How to have a MMF without including another Male

Fantasies can be tricky subjects especially with something like How to have a MMF when you have a long term partner who might not be as sexually inclined as what you would be. Sometimes if they are not as sexually experienced or sexually mature, your requests to try not so common things can come off as either an attack or something that might be ‘weird’ or ‘unusual’ to your partner. This tends to be a common theme when women ask their partners (most of the time they struggle to muster up the courage because they don’t want their partner to think that they want to cheat on him) to have a threesome that includes another male joining her and her male partner, making it a Male Male Female (MMF) threesome. This idea also plays on the sexual fantasy of Double Penetration which is a female being penetrated both vaginally and anally simultaneously. But how do you fulfil this fantasy when your partner doesn’t want to invite another male into the bedroom? There are a few things you can do to actually substitute the additional male out (although it won’t be the actual fantasy, this solution is a lot better than nothing at all). By substituting another person for multiple different positions and toys, you can actually have more fun for yourself and your partner. So here are a few steps you can take and/or do to get you close to fulfilling the fantasy without another man marching all up on your partner’s masculine territory.

COMMUNICATION

First things first, you have to communicate to your partner about your fantasy. This might be a tough conversation depending on who you choose to lay with. If you have experienced issues in the past when it comes to being open and communicating, then it might be best to really consider if this is the right person for you (Why do you want to be with someone who won’t even hear you out?). However, if you are with someone who is open to listening to you communicate then the first option would be to sit down and express to them what your fantasy is. It is super important in this conversation that you reassure him that it’s not about emotionally involving another man into the equation but rather the physical aspect. Explain that he is more than enough and that this has just always been a one off fantasy. By reassuring your partner that he is more than enough and he provides you with all the pleasure you need, this will heap him hopefully come to a decision to consider inviting another male into the bedroom. Also if he isn’t so comfortable with the idea and says he isn’t interested in doing it, he doesn’t walk away with a bitter taste in his mouth thinking that he isn’t good enough. In the case of the later option, this is where you can bring in a whole bunch of toys to substitute and fulfil.

As we all know, toys are a comrade for men rather than a competitor. They are designed to help increase pleasure for both partners and often help women reach climax. So what type of toys can you introduce to give you that MMF feeling? Well there are 2 different options that I would recommend.

DOUBLE PENETRATION

A double penetration dildo (Please see image for visual recognition). This toy is great for the exact same rhythm that the penis is doing when it comes to anal penetration. How it works is, it is held in place by 2 rings (One goes around the testicles and the other goes around the shaft of the penis). The dildo actually sits comfortably between the shaft of the penis and the testicles. It will move with your body when you thrust, giving the exact same motion of when you insert your penis. There are a vast amount of different positions you can use this toy with including the usual missionary, cowgirl and doggy. To really add pleasure to the experience, have a clitoral stimulator working the clitoris at the same time.

Suction cup dildo’s have always been an amazing addition to any single or couples toy collection. Reason being is that they are the closest toy that can simulate the real thing, especially when you’re using it on walls for doggy or on chairs for cow girl. How can you include it for your MMF experience? By using it on the glass you can either give the dildo oral whilst your partner pounds from behind, you can use the dildo anally whilst your partner is holding you up thrusting from the front vaginally. Switching up the different variants are very fun when it comes to involving both the dildo and your partner.

GANG BANG

These 2 options are fantastic if your partner does not want to include another Male. However, they can also be used if you’ve wanted to experience a multi-person gang bang also. Make sure to always look for ways to increase your pleasure. Have fun!

AJ is a consultant at the Oh Zone Adult Stores

6 Dating Apps to Fulfill Your Threesome Dream

threesomes

The advancement in technology has made it possible for users to have mobile applications for anything they want. No matter, it is finding a soul mate for marriage or looking for a threesome partner, everything is available on the internet.

We often receive requests from our viewers about which apps are the perfect choice for finding the right partner to enjoy a threesome. To help those readers, our team has researched and identified the top 6 dating apps to fulfill your threesome dream in detail. Let’s go through each option and install the one you like most on your phone!

  1. 3rder

It is one of the most exceptional dating apps for couples or singles looking for a threesome. 3rder is a fun application that can be installed on both iOS and Android devices. It is a special tool for open-minded individuals who are interested in doing something different. While visiting this site, you will find it is a playground for love where things begin with an awesome threesome sex chat.

 

  1. AdultFriendFinder

The next application we want to mention here is AdultFriendFinder having a pretty solid collection of swingers and sex lovers. None of the people will ever say something bad about this website thanks to its ability to make open sex enjoyable. Just try to stay away from scammers who make fake profiles on this platform.

 

  1. BiCupid

The main tagline of the BiCupid app is to let the users find bisexual and erotic people. They work for people who like to explore new things and fantasies to boost their pleasure levels. Stay honest with your needs on this platform while looking for a threesome, and we are pretty sure you will have a hell of a time.

 

  1. Get It On

Get It On is a very terrific app that gives plenty of group sex options in every city. Whether you are a couple or a single, this app gives liberty to explore new things hiding in your heart for a long time. Additionally, this app allows the users to post updates & stories just as Instagram.

 

  1. 3Somer

The fifth option we want to recommend to the users is 3Somer, specially made for those interested in threesomes. It is an easy-to-use application where making a profile doesn’t take much time. You will full liberty to give your preferences while looking for a partner on this mobile app.

 

  1. Fantasy Match

If you want to fulfill all your kinks & curiosities about sex, Fantasy Match is definitely a wonderful choice to make. The users get plenty of options while using this application that is exceptional for sure. Unlike boring mobile apps, it offers much more than just a threesome sex chat and makes sure you get the ideal partner for real sex.

Conclusion

These dating apps are very amazing options to transform your threesome fantasy into a reality. Whatever wish you have, we are pretty assured they will be very helpful for letting you move one step forward for an awesome pleasurable session.

Fetishes vs Fantasies.

fetishes and fantasies

Words are occasionally my favorite tool to use both in the bedroom and out. But today we aren’t talking about dirty talk, though we could. No today dear readers, we are talking semantics and comparing two of my favourite words and words that are often confused, confuddled and mixed up in many scenes, scenarios and interchanges between people when discussing kinks.

 

Fetish vs Fantasy.

 

Fetishes

 

A fetish can best be described as a strong desire or need for something be it an object or a person, an act or kink. There are those who can argue that a fetish could be categorized as an uncontrollable desire, the very opposite a phobia, in which a person has an uncontrollable fear, sometimes even irrational. Fetishes can sometimes be categorised as lust worthy, uncontrollable desires, perhaps even irrational to the rational part of a person’s mentality. But it still gives them sexual or pleasureable gratification.

 

Fetishes can be primal in nature and in some aspects some people have felt much shame in them. Finding safe and welcoming communities where they can find acceptance as well as safe spaces to safely explore, discuss and explore these fetishes is becoming more mainstream and is a joy to see as our society opens up and #breaksthestigma. Fetishes can be many and varied. To date there are over 239 fetishes but here are 12 of some of the most common sexual ones you may have come across

 

  1. Role-Playing – or dress ups. Just because we’re adults doesn’t mean we can’t play make believe sometimes. It can be fun to slip into a different person from time to time, try on a fun costume and pretend to be a different character.

 

  1. Anal sex – this one is a little bit of a grey area, some people enjoy anal sex as a sexul act while others visualise it as a fetish. As long as everyone is consensually enjoying it, who are we to label labels?

 

  1. Lingerie – being aroused by a certain type of lingerie is definitely a fetish and more common than people give it credit. Stockings. Lace. satin. Latex. These pieces of adorning lingerie can be wholeheartedly turn ons for people.

 

  1. Impact Play- spanking, flogging, paddling and other forms of consensual striking.

 

  1. Foot Fetish – the worship of feet through acts such as kissing, massage, smelling, licking, touching or just watching.

 

  1. Bondage – Being tied up or restrained. Bondage can range from very mild to very intense and is usually found in BDSM but has also been known to be one of the first things to try when spicing up things in the bedroom. Restaurants can be made from cuffs, rope, a tie, cable ties,…..many things.

 

  1. Group sex – threesomes and foursomes are the most common but group sex also extends to orgies involving multiple people and gang-bangs including one person of one gender and mutliples of the other gender.

 

  1. Sensory play- When we think sensory play we often immediately think of hot and cold, ice and fire, or in this case wax play. Sensation play also includes blindfolds, feathers and for the more experienced, electrostim play.

 

  1. Dirty Talk – I say Dirty talk but well, it’s not really more things like humiliation and degradation, being called names, talking down and dirty.

 

  1. Orgasm control – or denial. This is edging into BDSM and is a subsection of submission and dominance, bringing the submissive to the brink of orgasm and forced to stop. And doing so repeatedly. or , withholding sex or orgasms over a period of time as a form of teasing.

 

  1. Voyuerism and exhibitionism- watching people having sex, or having sex out in public ith the risk of being caught having sex is very common. WHo among us has not had sex in a car or sneakily in the cinema?

 

  1. Pornography – Watching, looking at pornographic material, before or during sexual intercourse or play

 

So

 

Fantasies.

 

I will admit. Fantasies and Fetishes are not all that different. But the difference is a big one. Fantasies are our respective, imagined scenarios that get us all hot and heavy. They are the screenplay in our minds that we make up, that may involve various fetishes, or wants or desires, but they do not necessarily control us.

 

AND

 

This is the big one

 

We may not want to play them out in real life.

 

Fetishes drive us. We want them. Some people need them.

 

Fantasies are exactly that. They are imaginary.

 

Staging a scene in real life to mirror your fantasy, while nice, will be hard, especially if it is a fantasy you have lived and re-lived in your imagination for years. You have built it up with such exquisite and erotic detail that that is a hard act to nail in real life to the exactness of the fantasy. The fetishes, sure thing, those can be met. But the fantasy is a construct of the amalgamation of the fetishes and how you have controlled them in your imaginatorium.

 

Another example is a real life example of a couple who divulged their fantasies that they masturbated to, to one another, and the husband thought it would be nice to organise his wife’s fantasy, not realising, that while she fantasised about it, when faced with it she had zero interest in fulfilling it with him.

 

I think an important takeaway is that fantasies are amazing, and that everyone should have them, talk about them if you’re open enough and confident to do so, but make it clear when you do, if your fantasy is something you want to try, or something personal you enjoy having a good solo session to when you’re alone.

 

At Your Service

Tiffany

Caringbah Oh Zone Sales Assistant, Educator and Linguist

How To Host A Swinger’s Party!

What is swinging?

Swinging is a form of open relationship where committed couples engage in non-monogamous sexual behaviour. This isn’t just limited to couples but also to singles who enjoy engaging in open sex and orgy-like scenarios. Swinging became more mainstream during the 60’s with the sexual revolution and as time goes on we see more and more people becoming involved in the swinging lifestyle.

Timing is everything

You’ll want to pick a date in advance to give yourself enough time to plan the party and give people enough notice. Ideally, you’d want to pick a weekend give yourself about 4-6 weeks to plan and prepare. Try to avoid long weekends or holidays as people may have other commitments and therefore fewer guests at your party!

Location, location, location

You could hire an external space like a hotel room (or a few) or even a hall. However, these options can be costly to hire and food options will also be an added cost. If you’re comfortable to do so you could host the party from your own home, just make sure you remove any breakables or things that you don’t want body fluid on! Once your date and venue are locked in you can begin the festivities.

Guest list and rules

You should allocate a set number of guest, many swingers clubs limit the number of single men but often encourage single women to attend by offering free entry. You will want to keep a similar approach in your party planning as more often than not you’ll find women are more incline to swing with other couples or seek a woman to join them. If you have a high number of straight men there is a decrease in swinging activities.

Snacks to spreads

No party is complete without food, and your swinger’s party should be no different. I am not suggesting that you need to serve a 7 course sit down meal. You could consider having a platter spread or bowls of snack food, this is a good chance to make people comfortable as a guest if they are hungry. This is also an excellent ice-breaker for people to meet over the snacks or platters, an easy option for people to suss out their next potential playmate.

Comfort is key

You should have designated sex areas such as: couches, beds, bean bags and thing cosy and where people can get their swing on. Should you not want guest getting it on in your kitchen – assign no sex areas in the house and be very clear if anyone breaks this rule they will no longer be welcome at your party. Like I previously mentioned make sure you remove anything you don’t want damaged during a sex romp or stained with the body fluids that COME with sex parties. (See what I did there?)

Plan your party with your planning style in mind

Make sure your guests have elected their playmate and that everyone is comfortable in their space before you all get busy; it’s easier to manage a party beforehand, otherwise you’ll be very upset if you don’t get an orgasm before you’re interrupted with something party related. If you’re like me, I find it easier to manage a party or event if I am not involved in the activities at all. There is nothing wrong with micromanaging if it’s your style, there is also nothing wrong with completely winging it and going with the flow, it’s your party, host it however you see fit.

To let sleepovers happen or not

You should decide before the party if you want guest to sleep over or not. Personally, as a party planner it is easier to manage if all your guests leave after the swinging is over. That way you don’t have to worry about guests needing to feed in the morning or having a guest potentially steal from you or other guests. Having an estimated end time to the party should prompt guests to leave and as host you can do a once over of the house before you go to bed to ensure everyone has left the property.

Hosting Swingers

The clean up

The worst part of hosting is the clean-up and I am sure you will have lots and lots to clean. You should try tackling a whole room of the house before you move on to the next room and having those sex free spaces will come in handy for the clean-up. Remember to wash all bedding, sheets, pillowcases etc. you will need to vacuum and mop and clear the dishes and left over food. Once you’ve cleaned your house, light a candle, sit down and relax – you did it, you threw a swingers party! If you enjoyed it you can start planning your next swinger’s party maybe you could post an ad in your locate OhZone centre and invite other local swingers!

The Do’s and Don’ts Of Group Sex

Group Sex Spongebob Image

Sexual fantasies involving multiple people are one of the most common fantasies for both men and women, it is also one of the reasons why people watch porn. I used to believe that only few people ever ventured into group sex territory and that it was a thing that happened behind closed doors at the end of a dark alley way guarded by vicious werewolves.  I am now a little older and wiser, my mind since expanding as to what is possible when it comes to participating in sexual experiences with multiple people all at the same time. I now realise it can occur in so many different ways and is extremely common. Just to paint a picture of the extent of group sex, here’s a few fun facts:

  • Cuckholding is defined as a man seeing his partner/wife having sex with another man. It is the second most commonly searched heterosexual internet porn categories worldwide.
  • An estimated 15 million Americans engaged in swinging in 2011 (That’s 4% of the population!!).
  • In Japan, Bukkake parties, where multiple men masturbate and ejaculate onto a woman, are held regularly, with establishments openly advertising these parties in very public places.

Through my experiences, I’ve realised that group sex can be challenging to negotiate either as a single person or when in a relationship. It is for this reason I am sharing some advice for group sex newbies and people looking to open to this wonderful and exciting field of possibilities.

Communication

If this is not present then challenging issues may arise. Communication needs to be open throughout any sexual experience and with more then two people involved, it is especially important that everyone involved feels comfortable communicating. If you can’t communicate with one partner, you’re going to struggle with more so I recommend having this down pat before experimenting with multiple people at once. There are some really important things to discuss prior to engaging in a group sexcapade that will mean a healthy and fulfilling experience.

  • Boundaries: What is not ok, what behaviours are you not willing to engage in, what are your limits? When this information is known, the people you are engaging with can feel more at ease knowing your limits and what is ok to do. Obviously, things can change throughout the experience and it is important that all people involved are empowered to speak up throughout.
  • Desires: Speaking your desires and voicing what turns you on can be a really juicy way of letting everyone involved know how best to pleasure you. It means that you get to receive exactly what turns you on

Sexual Health

Taking the right precautions to stay physically healthy is crucial and having more sexual partner’s means you’re at a greater risk of contracting sexually transmitted infections. In order to make sure that you’re safe when engaging in group sex, condoms are a must. This also means using a different condom for each partner. Getting tested for STI’s is important in order to keep everyone safe.

 

World Ending Group Sex Question
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Eliminate Expectations For It To Go A Certain Way

Like any sexual experience, trying to stick to a plan is a libido destroyer. Adult movies demonstrate threesomes, foursomes and moresomes in a way that is intended to entertain the viewer-it is not for educational purposes. So don’t be concerned if your experience doesn’t look the way you thought it might. Group sex, like any other sexual experience, can be messy and awkward at times. I mean, for a start, an extra set of limbs is guaranteed to make for some logistical concerns! I find that approaching group sex with a sense of playfulness without trying to get it “right” is a sure way of making it a memorable experience for all the right reasons.

Must Be An Authentic Mutual Desire Of All People Involved

No matter if it involves 3, 4 or 10 people, having all people on the same page is vital in order for the group experience to be enjoyable. If you are going along to fulfill your partners desires and they are not your own, issues are sure to arise. I can’t stress this enough, only partake if it is your own desire to do so!

Jealousy Is A Normal Emotion

Speaking to friends about polyamory and sex with multiple partners, I hear the same thing “I couldn’t do that, I would get too jealous.” Now maybe I am wrong here but I believe that no matter what kind of relationship you are in or what kind of experiences you partake in, jealousy is probably going to come up! It may be that you’re jealous because your boyfriend has an attractive work friend who he spends time with. Or it could be that you get jealous when you saw your girlfriend checking out the cute bartender. In fact you may experience either emotional jealousy or sexual jealousy, or maybe you’ll experience both at the same time. Often the stories we create to justify why we feel jealous are unfounded however it is a strong emotion that brings out very intense feelings which is why people avoid situations where it may be felt. My advice to you is to openly discuss these feelings and fears with your partner without projecting it on them or blaming them for your feelings. If facing is jealousy is completely out of the question then maybe group sex is not your cup of tea. However if you can see it for what it is-an emotion that will pass-and you’re prepared to possibly feel it then group sex may be the best thing that’s ever happened to you.

Have Fun!!

I think the main point to remember when participating in group sex is that it should be an overall fun, pleasurable and playful experience that allows you to connect with different people. I have spoken to many people who swear that opening their relationship was the best thing they did. I understand it is not for everyone but any shame surrounding a mutual desire to participate in group sex in the context of a relationship needs to be eradicated. Also any single people looking to explore with multiple people should be proud of their willingness to explore the possibilities of this awesome activity

Author: Stephanie Curtis- BA NursingSave

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