Is It An Electric Toothbrush Or Clit Annihilator?

Woman Wearing Heels On Bed

So my first day in the Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centre at Kogarah I walked into the store and although I had been in there before I was still amazed by the sheer size of the shop! Not to mention how many products were in there, anything thing you could possibly think of!  I walked around to familiarised myself with all the products in the store, I looked at all the cabinets and this is one of the products that stood out that very first day. My first thoughts were:

“Haha… that looks like my electric toothbrush”

I then thought about it some more and my initial opinion was,

“My god that would annihilate your clit!”

Zumio Clitoral Stimulator
Sex Toy: Zumio

Fast forward to a few weeks later and I was given this “Annihilator” to review. Reading the packaging as I do normally just to sus the whole thing out, opened the box and my first thought was still how much this thing looks like my electric toothbrush!

Due to my insane trust issues! And I mean insane! I don’t believe anything! I was reading all the quotes on the box;

“Join the pleasure revolution”

Yeah right!

“60-second quickie, mind-blowing multiple orgasms”

Pfft yeah right! Good one marketing team! I turned this “thing” on (I refer to it as a thing because I am still sceptical at this point in time). Put the speed up and down, put it in its charger plugged it in and left it on my coffee table. I started to read the instructions and leaflet it came with, I came across a little orgasm challenge, again thinking to myself how creative the marketing team at this company is!

Zumio Is An Award Winning Product
Photo: Zumio Adultex Winner 2017

As I have just gotten a rather large tattoo and sat for 7.5 hours my whole body is fairly used to vibrations so how is this thing going to compare? And isn’t the cliché the bigger the better? This thing is tiny! My normal vibrator goes alright I don’t suppose they are much different from one to the next, but still a little curious; this little contraption could it really be all the hype?

I Always Draw On My Past

I always draw on my past and the fact that for over five years my body was numb from anti-depressants so everything I feel is a new experience. After trauma your body changes, your nerves and sensations change as well as your emotions, things don’t feel the same as before.  And as for being “turned on” forget that! You don’t even have saliva let alone anything else! It takes a long time for your body to start doing “its thing” and acting somewhat normal with normal bodily functions and reactions! So, as you can imagine when my body decided to produce saliva again I woke up thinking I was drowning, and as such the rest of my body followed suit.

3 Steps To Use A Zumio
Buy Now | Luxury Sex Toy Shop

Now, Where Does The Zumio Fit Into All Of This?

If you noticed I have now called it by its name! Why? Because it is a little annihilator! This little, compact, slimline, concentrated annihilator just woke up my entire body in less than thirty seconds! “Go hard or go home” well this Zumio definitely knows the definition of that! Wow, that’s all I can begin to say! It awakens all your pleasure zones and with some teasing, you drip! I mean your whole body is on a whole new level, every slight vibration is intense and powerful. It’s tailored to explore and that you can do with all the pleasures in the world with only your imagination as your weakness. Apart from the weakness in your legs if you try to stand up too quickly.

Now when you read the box and the website it explains how and why this product was made and it’s definitely going back to basics. It’s also invented by women, I am not one to bag out the opposite sex and their ability to design vibrators for women. I mean I will proudly admit I can’t make decisions to save my life, let alone pick my favourite toy! But right now, the Zumio is my front runner!

The Reason Why This Annihilator Is So Perfect

The reason why this annihilator is so perfect is that it has localised nerve stimulation messages, with very efficient energy transfer; which is why the Zumio feels so intense! It is isolated and concentrated and you have perfect control to each individual area you are exploring. The Zumio was designed to automate the tried and tested true circular fingertip motion; during manual clitoral masturbation for women instinctively randomly change finger pressure, slow down, speed up and move their finger location as they need to increase arousal. The Zumio’s unique tip and stylus simulates the same natural fingertip motion and allows users to dynamically go from high speed and intensity down to low speed and intensity by simply applying varying pressure to the tip. This is because like a clutch in a car it disengages the transmission even though the motor is running, Zumio’s patented motor clutch drive system enables you to control Zumio’s intensity manually just by applying pressure. This means there is no need to touch a control and it becomes a much more manual approach.

Zumio also is made from medical grade silicone/abs plastics, it’s washable, waterproof and durable! The handle doesn’t vibrate unlike most vibrators so it is quiet! The charging dock is very simple to use and basically a plug and play method.

So really this machine is up to your own imagination and pleasure zones, where this excitement takes you it is tailored to your imagination and your willingness to explore! Where’s your Zumio journey going to take you?

Go hard or go home!

About the author: Morgan is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres

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Jennifer works marketing at Adultsmart an online sex toy shop. She has a non-judgemental approach to sex, sex toys and sexuality. Her favorite saying is if it feels good and right and is not illegal then why not!

Top 4 Budget Friendly Orgasms For First-Timers

Woman Making Orgasm

Working in the Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres, I get so excited when women come in buying their first vibrator. There is an enormous range of vibrators to choose from which means that many people can become overwhelmed with the options- different shapes, sizes and functions all ranging in price from $20 all the way up to more than $300.

I love when people can come in and be really open with what they are looking for because it means that they are more likely to walk away with a toy that is just right for them and their unique needs. When women have no idea what they are seeking, there are a few questions I like to ask to ascertain what will best suit them.

Upon asking them if they are looking for a clitoral or vaginal stimulator, many women can be unsure of what they like but are after something inexpensive. In this case, my go-to vibrators are the Fun Factory Mini Vibrator range. The Fun Factory Semilino, Amorino, Pearly & Cayona are in my opinion some of the best first-timers for women looking for a good quality toy.

These toys are a great size for newbies as they have enough length to use internally for vaginal penetration yet are small enough to use for clitoral stimulation. Trying to use something big and bulky for your clitoris can be very annoying and having a bullet sized vibe when you really want to have something inside you can be extremely frustrating!

Semilino

The Semilino is a ribbed, slightly curved dildo vibe with powerful vibrations. It features a grooved head on the end which can be bended for G-Spot stimulation. The Semilino is perfect for those who like a textured feel. It is available in black and bright pink.

Semilino By Fun Factory
Sex Toy: Semilino

Amorino

The Amorino is a very interesting vibrator, similar in shape to the rabbit style vibrators, featuring a unique silicone band around the shaft and clitoral stimulator. The purpose of this band is to provide greater external stimulation to the vagina and vulva as the powerful vibrations travel through it when turned on. The band can also be removed making this toy perfect for anal penetration due to the clit stimulator being a safe stopper. This toy features some gorgeous detail and is available in Aqua/Yellow or Pink/Yellow.

Amorino By Fun Factory
Sex Toy: Amorino

Pearly

The Pearly is a cute looking toy with an equally cute name. The Pearly features a round stimulator which I am guessing is for the stimulating the entry to the vagina as it would require a bit of manoeuvring to get it to stimulate your clit due to its short length. The insertable part is slightly curved and measure approximately 7cms in length. For women who may not like something very long, this would be a great option. The Pearly is available in purple or green.

Pearly By Fun Factory
Sex Toy: Pearly

Cayona

Saving my favourite till last, the Cayona is a playful looking toy, with our display version likened to a banana due to its unique pastel yellow shade (Also available in pastel pink, blue and green). The Cayona has a curved tip perfect for direct internal G-Spot stimulation or clitoral stimulation when used externally. The Cayona features grooves on the underside which adds a unique texture to your self-pleasuring experience.

Cayona By Fun Factory
Buy Now | Fun Factory Adult Store

All Fun Factory toys are made from medical grade silicone which has a slightly textured feel to it. When used with a good quality water based lubricant such as JO Agape, this is a very welcome sensation.

Do not let the word Mini confuse you – the vibrations are powerful and deep with adjustable speeds and patterns controlled with the 2 buttons. The On/Off button is simple to use-unlike other vibes it requires one press to turn it off. They also feature a travel lock which means they are great toys to travel with or to keep in your handbag (You know, just in case!).

These Fun Factory vibes are rechargeable with a magnetic USB charger. I’ve found these chargers can be slightly annoying to use so just make sure you have it on a flat surface when charging where you will not knock it. The toy is 100% waterproof making it great for play in the shower or bath and very easy to clean under the tap. I’d recommend using a foaming toy cleaner such as Wicked Foam n Fresh Cleaner for a really thorough clean. A well taken care of toy lasts a lot longer so keep this in mind.

The Fun Factory Vibrators feature a 2-year warranty which covers the toy against any manufacturing faults. I have constantly heard amazing things about the quality of Fun Factory vibrators so this is just an added reassurance that these toys will stand the test of time.

I believe these toys are perfect for vibrator newbies especially considering the affordable price and high quality. Definitely a big thumbs up from me!! For more information, be sure to read our exclusive interview with Laura Von Der Brelie from Fun Factory.

About the author: Sophie is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres

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Jennifer works marketing at Adultsmart an online sex toy shop. She has a non-judgemental approach to sex, sex toys and sexuality. Her favorite saying is if it feels good and right and is not illegal then why not!

JoyDivision BIOglide Making Love Naturally – A Different Type of Review!

Water Based Lube

Chapter One – The Stitch Up!

Thanks JoyDivision for sending this product for review – somehow I got wrangled into receiving it as a bit of a stitch up.  Yesterday morning I walked into my office to see a cute little tube of BIO Glide on my desk with a post it note attached ‘Product to Review – Minimum 800 words’.  Heck I write a lot, I write articles for other blogs, I write content for websites, I write product descriptions and I send out products to our reviewers who will then look, feel, see the product and write an instructive review.  Up until now though, I have never been given or taken a product.

As I picked up the cute little tube I could see across my desk Stephen having a bit of a chuckle – possibly at my expense!

I said, ‘Stephen who put this on my desk this morning?’

He said, “Your wife.”

I said, “But Stephen this is not my wife’s writing.”

He said, “Oh Yeah, it was Belinda and Maria.  They were laughing whilst they were doing it.”

I said, “Right, Ok then.  I had a bit of an argument with Maria last night.  Hmmm.”

He said, “I thought it was something like that the way they were laughing.”

Hmmm, I thought!  As I picked up and looked at the bottle.  My eyesight is not that great anymore and I could not read the smaller writing so I asked, “Is this a personal lubricant or a massage lotion or both.  I can see it is water-based but if I am to do a review of the product, I guess I should know where to use it.”

Stephen took the bottle from me, examined it and said, “It’s a personal lube.”

I thanked Stephen and carried on with my work until the early afternoon when Belinda entered our office with a big smile on her face – making a surprising impression of a Cheshire cat.

I said, after picking up the BIO glide, “Did you leave this on my desk?”

She said, chuckling, “Mrs. V asked me too.  She said it is something that she would really like as it is made organically”

I said, “I have no problem doing a product review and will make sure it is over 800 words but obviously you are aware that Mrs. V and I had a bit of a spat last night so I am not sure if this is the right product that either you or she wants reviewed at this particular time”.

Belinda laughed and we discussed issues relating to business.

My wife is a lover of all things natural, organic and holistic – however those words to me often mean more expensive, deceptive and no better.  That is not to say that some products that are produced in their purest sense do not have health or other benefits but generally there is little oR no difference.  The body naturally produces toxins that will kill you.  There are over 75 chemicals that are approved to use on certified organic foods and eaten by free range animals.  Of all the certified organically produced there are basically none that have not been in contact with pesticides or chemicals, however these pesticides and chemicals are restricted to a standards list both in Australia and the United States.  Organic foods generally will not be processed using irradiation, industrial solvents or synthetic food additives.

Sorry I went off on a tangent then – but basically as far as foods are concerned there is little evidence to suggest that eating organic is better for you in fact Associate Professor Samir Samman, from the School of Molecular Bioscience at the University of Sydney, says

“there is little evidence to suggest that organic food is nutritionally better than conventional food, especially in relation to fresh fruit and vegetables.”

In a major study that has been accepted for publication in the international scientific journal Critical Reviews In Food Science And Nutrition, Professor Samman and his team

“surveyed the international literature and critically evaluated the results”

and they aren’t heartening FACTS that the organics industry wants to hear.

In fact reviews and tests have shown that many non-organic and even synthesized products contain more vitamins, are more nutritious than their ‘organic’ counterparts.

Ethical lube
Natural lube

Chapter Two – BIOGlide Lubricant

So after Belinda left and with the word organic running through my mind I decided to do a bit of research on BIO Glide.  This product is made by JoyDivision, not the English Rock/Pop Band of the 70’s, but the German sex toy company that has been around for over 20 years producing products for great sensuality.  JoyDivisioin takes the manufacture of their products seriously and dermatologically and clinically test all their products before release to ensure they are body-safe and skin friendly which is good to know.

Presently they have over 250 premium products in their brand that are sold in over 60 Countries worldwide.  Positive social and environmental impact is at the forefront of their mission statement and they are official members of Unicef, Aidshilfe and Terre Des Hommes all organizations that ethically try to better the planet.

So the first thing I noticed on the bottle was a label saying CO2 Neutral sticker.  Mmmm, this is one I had not seen before so a quick bit of research informs me that this is a voluntary commitment by a manufacturer that due to unavoidable CO2 emissions made in the manufacture of this product that they will compensate by supporting a climate protection project in Bolivia.

-Rick thinks to himself!!!- (you gave this product to the wrong person Mrs V and Belinda).

So I research this further and the only reference to this project I can find is on the JoyDivision website from which I quote –

“Sustainable trading and a voluntary commitment to preservation of the climate are a matter of course for JOYDIVISION. Unavoidable CO2 emissions from manufacturing and transport are compensated by a climate protection project in Bolivia.
JOYDIVISION is investing there in the reforestation of native species of trees with an added social and ecological benefit. This benefits not only the climate, but also the biodiversity and the local people.”

So the CO2 sticker basically means that the manufacturer voluntarily is sending an undisclosed amount of money, or resources to reforesting Bolivia.  OK, I guess that’s nice!

BIO products are said to be made of the highest standard being a 100% natural vegan lubricant suitable for vaginal and oral intercourse (am not sure why it cannot be used for anal sex?).  It is safe to use with all sex toys and condoms and is highly effect – the catch phrase of 90% of all lubricants –

“with a little going a long way”.

What is interesting is that it is naturally certified by the BDIH.  To give you a bit of a background there were all sorts of certifications going around for sex toys and lubricants but in 2014 the German Institute of Dietary Supplements and Cosmetics developed the ‘Natural Product Standard’.  This certification offers the consumer a guarantee that the product is natural and also makes BioGlide the first lubricant classified as a ‘natural medical device’.

Additional information about BIOglide lubricant is that it is pH-optimized, developed with no animal testing, has no synthetics or chemicals in it.   It has supposedly won first place in Men’s Health magazine but I could not find out what the competition it won or anything related to BIOglide’s win online and a search on the Men’s Health site for bioglide came up with no results.

Best Glycerin
Why glycerin

So let’s get to the ingredients of BIOglide.  All water-based lubricants main ingredient is glycerin which is made from animal or vegetable fats.  This is the main ingredient of BIOgllide and the others are

Aqua – Water

Sodium Lactate – Saline

Xanthan Gum – Food Additive and Thickening Agent

Levulinic Acid – is an organic compound with the formula CH₃CCH₂CH₂CO₂H. It is classified as a keto acid. This white crystalline solid is soluble in water and polar organic solvents.

Sodium Levulinate – Is the salt produced by Levulinic Acid and used as a preservative and for skin care.

Lactic Acid – is an organic compound with the formula CH₃CHCOOH. In its solid state, it is white and water-soluble. In its liquid state, it is colorless. It is produced both naturally and synthetically.

So now I had researched the product and the claims that the manufacturer it was time to do the touch taste so I removed the seal and placed the lubricant between my thumb and other fingers.  It was soft and silky the way a personal lubricant should be.  Having worked in the adult industry for close to 30 years now I have tested a few and this one felt really good.  Then I dabbed a little on my tongue and it was slightly sweet – not sickly so – and certainly not unpleasant.

 

The next test I find the most important and that is rubbing it away with a paper towel.  If it is a good lubricant there still should be a residue and surely enough the residue remained so it certainly ticks the boxes in those three tests.  So there I was looking forward to going home and as soon as we put the kids to bed taking BIOglide on a road test with Mrs. V.

Chapter Three – The Train Wreck

Getting home at 6.30pm I made a bit of an event in asking my wife how her day had been and letting her know that I had taken home the product that I had been told to review.  Intimating how exciting it would be to road test a new lubricant.  We had dear friends and their family over and it was Pizza night.  They left about 8.20pm and we then powered through ‘The Block’ having pre-recorded it -for those readers not in Australia it is a type of home renovation series and by 9.40pm the kids were doing zzz’s in bed.

Excitedly I reminded Mrs. V about the product for review and she replied, “I’m too tired. Going to bed!”

Train Crash
Train Wrecked

With a quick peck goodnight, I poured myself another drink and watched the idiot box for another hour or so and then went to be as well.

 

So unfortunately Belinda and Mrs. V I am unable to present you with a full product review at this stage but await in anticipation to be allowed the avenue to fully test it.  That will make Chapter Four of the BIOglide review for the adultsmart blog.

Chapter Four – The Pre Test

So the following night – having presented Belinda and Mrs. V with my half-completed review via email I returned home after work at about 6.15pm in the evening.  Dinner had been prepared and was awaiting serving in the oven,  Mrs. V was with a friend on the balcony and I said ‘hello’ to them both giving my wife a quick peck on the lips.

I began walking back to the lounge-room when Mrs. V called out, ‘I have been getting phone calls from people telling me to read your review.”

I said, “Well you would have received a phone call from only one person as I only emailed the non-complete review to Belinda and you.  So what did Belinda have to say?”

She said, “That I have to read it!  I haven’t had the chance as I have had people with, all day.”

I said, “No drama.”

I played with the kids, and then we had dinner about 7pm. Just for some irrelevant information it was oven baked Chicken and baked lemon potatoes.  Actually quite yummy.

After dinner and washing up Mrs. V said, “I read your review. ”

I said,  “Did you like it?”

She said, “Sure, I guess we better road test the product so you can complete your review!”

I said, “That sounds like a plan.”

Chapter Five – The Road Test

After we put the kids to bed we lay on the couch and watched a mind numbing movie that Mrs V for some reason enjoyed.  It was called Due Date with Robert Downey Junior and the guy from Hangover.  I was not a great fan of the hangover series of movies and found this one even less impressive, but the wife liked it, so I tolerated it as it gave her some joy and laughs.  It finished at 10.30am and we then sat on the balcony and chewed the fat for about 30 minutes and then went to bed with my trusty container of BIOglide by my side.

 

After doing the mandatory brushing of teeth and other functions for hygiene and the body we went to bed and I asked, “Have you got one of your friends handy”.

lube test
testing lubricant

Look, I am a firm believe in sensual foreplay, giving a gentle erotic massage, some passionate kissing, exploring each others bodies so that both our desires are raised when the actual act takes place.   However, this we do when we have an hour (or a couple) to spare and explore each other to become more connected.  Sorry, after 11pm, and after a hard days work I am not that romantic person and will call in the big guns to help in the foreplay department.

Incorporating sex toys into our foreplay and love making techniques allows us to have fast sex without it feeling like a

‘wham bam, thank you ma’am’!

So Mrs. V grabbed one of her favorite Romant toys.  I grabbed the BIOglide and liberally applied it to the toy and gently lubricated her.  Maria likes mostly to use sex toys externally and is not big on inserting them, so my mate Romant went to work whilst I enjoyed the show.  After she was suitably turned on I applied the BIOglide to myself and we were intimate with each other.

Personally I am not a big fan of water based lubricants and I will tell you why.  Recently I read the results of a survey – it revealed that men that orgasmed during sex in under 4 minutes are said to have premature ejaculation problems.  Those that lasted between 4-12 minutes are considered normal.  Personally, I very rarely ejaculate in under 12 minutes and when we have time (and are not tired) enjoy have marathon sessions.

That being the case most water based lubricants dry up within a ten minute period and need re-application frequently thereafter.  As you reapply it dries quicker and becomes sticky, a feeling I find a total turn-off and to be quite honest quite disgusting.  We tend you use silicone lubricants as they

“last and last, and a little goes a long way”

as most lube product claim to – silicone actually does. But I have digressed again.

On application, like my previous test it was silky smooth – and to be quite honest was almost as good in feeling as a silicone lubricant.  It felt good and natural on the skin and it was all thumbs up from the starting point.  Unfortunately come around the 8 minute mark it began to become sticky and glammy and by the 10 minute mark we were re-applying.

This is a perfect lubricant for those that want to be intimate for 10 minutes or under.  For anybody that likes longer sessions I rate it 3 out of 5 because of the initial feeling and it is what I have come to expect from the majority of water based lubes on the market..

Mrs. V comments were, ‘It was really sticky – I don’t rate it.”  So I guess she is a harsher critic than me – or she has been spoiled too long with the use of Silicone lubricants.  Surprising though as it was ORGANIC!

Rick is the owner of the Adultsmart, an online sex toy shop that stocks over 13,000 products. He has been involved in the adult lifestyle industry for more than 25 years. Rick is an active sex blogger who provides a wealth of information and experience. He is an advocate of equality for gender and sexuality.

My Big Daddy’s Girth Dominates

Man Showing Off His Big Penis

As a self-love advocate, I love to encourage women to nurture the relationship they have with their bodies and strongly support the need for women to love and accept their genitals just as they are. A recent customer coming into the Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centre highlighted something I have noticed for some time now and that is the shame many women carry when it comes to the size of their vagina.

(Anatomy lesson 101- The vagina is the canal in which sexual intercourse occurs –  The vulva defines the outside genitalia of a women i.e. the inner and outer labia & clitoris – There are different types of vaginas)

This female customer bought a reasonably sized, girthy dildo and came back not too much later in the evening to purchase a larger one. She was embarrassed to ask but eventually opened up discussing having children and needing a big toy to experience greater pleasure with her partner.

Now this certainly was not the first large dildo I had sold and I highly doubt that she is the only woman to have a vagina that can take a girthy cock. I assured her that I carried no judgements but felt bothered with the fact that she believed she needed to be embarrassed admitting this.

Claiming someone is “loose” or has a “loose vagina” is often said in a derogatory manner with the intention of shaming someone either for the shape of their body or for their sexual behaviours. I cringe when I hear insults related to women’s’ bodies as whether we are conscious of it or not, it buys into the idea that our bodies are something to hide and feel bad about (Calling a weak man a “pussy” for example- If you ask me, I think they should be proud of being referred to as a pussy). I think many people forget that because of the capacity of the vagina to expand they could be birthed into this world!

Side View Of Big Daddy By Mr Hankey Toys
Sex Toy: Big Daddy Side View

Receiving a Mr Hankey Big Daddy Dildo to review reminded me of the customer who had shame around buying a large dildo mainly because I would have loved to have sold her one of these amazing toys! I don’t think there should not be any embarrassment in buying larger dildos’, with different body types meaning some people are more suited to using them then others-simple as that!

Mr. Hankey’s Toys specializes in large, huge and giant silicone dildos, with a variety of extremely unique toys in there range. The Big Daddy comes in four sizes, the small (if you can call it that) coming in at 10 inches of insertable length, the medium 11.5 inches, the large 13 inches and the XXXL 14.5 inches.

These dildos are made from platinum silicone which is a non-porous and body-safe material. Many of the large realistic feel dildos are made from PVC or TPR which, as well as having a horrible plastic smell, are porous materials and will break down over time. Platinum silicone is very easy to clean with spray or foam toy cleaner and can be used with silicone lubricants, not just water based like many other toys. The feel of these toys is extremely realistic which is different than many of the other silicone toys in store. It is squishy with a slight drag to it and can be bended to hit the right spots.

Size Range Of Big Daddy By Mr Hankey Toys
Buy Now | Adultshop Online That Stock’s Dildos

The base on the Mr Hankey Big Daddy is round and wide which is easy to hold onto and safe if used for anal play. This toy is available with or without a Vac-U-Lock hole so is compatible to be used as a strap on or with a suction base. The only thing I would say about using it as a strap on dildo is that due to the size and weight of these toys, you would need quite a sturdy strap on harness to keep it in place. There are larger metal rings compatible with these larger toys to purchase on The Mr Hankey website and they also have a link to purchase custom made harnesses. In case you forgot how to access their site, it is printed on the base of the dildo!

The Big Daddy is available in 3 colours, Natural Tan, Deep Brown or Black, suitable for a range of unique tastes. These colours come in a medium firm texture, with the Natural Tan also available in 75% Soft texture. The 75% Soft texture is described as similar to a penis that is 75-85% erect whilst the Medium Firm is fully erect.  The realistic detail of this dildo is amazing, with the pronounced head and veins creating a texture for increased stimulation.

I think it is so great to have large realistic dildos made from quality materials like this platinum silicone and couldn’t recommend Mr Hankey toys enough because of this. If you are looking for a visually appealing range of huge dildos then Mr Hankey have you covered.  And if there is desire for a dildo of this size to be used for sexual play, I say shift away from that shame and embrace your body just as it is!

About the author: Sophie is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle CentresSave

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Jennifer works marketing at Adultsmart an online sex toy shop. She has a non-judgemental approach to sex, sex toys and sexuality. Her favorite saying is if it feels good and right and is not illegal then why not!

Deciding To Touch – A Personal Story

Sexual Assault Teal Ribbon

*Disclaimer- assault may trigger some readers please be advised*

Here we go, my personal story of how the me of today came to light. Not all of us come into this world of sexual excitement and enticement with a “bang”. A one in which magical arousing confetti erupts into the air as the “to be” most enchanted moment arrives. Some start off with fear, caution, and betrayal, that “thing” that everyone says won’t happen to them happens.

You don’t have to be drunk at a party or be put in a dodgy situation for this to happen, sometimes just walking your dog in a friendly neighbourhood can become a crime scene. We all utter the words “I won’t put myself in that situation for that to happen” but it’s not always our choice.

Choice is my most used word in my vocabulary, choice is the motto of my life. My choices are what got me to where I am today, although that road was a rough ride with many mistakes I am proud to say they were all because I chose.

Not all those who are assaulted go out into the big bad wide world and to put it bluntly “sleep with everything that moves” to fill that void and numb the pain. Don’t get me wrong it works for some but for me, this wasn’t an option I was willing to take. I chose to choose my emotions over my body, and it’s a choice I’ll never regret. The body never forgets and it’s the fault of the mind, simple touches that should be arousing and intimate become triggers for pain and emotion. Flinching is normal, flinching at the most normal touches almost become unbearable. Hugging is a huge one for me, a simple hug is not easy because you are allowing someone into your personal space and your body.

Quote by imom.com
Image: Good Sex Starts With Good Conversation

The body recalls a touch that was once sensual and arousing and turns it into a trigger to shut off and become numb. I chose to handle myself the best way I knew possible, I chose to choose. My first time was taken with scares as a memory every single day. I had to teach myself to feel again, I had to learn to not block out my emotions and to become myself again. I had to learn not to shower five times a day because I constantly felt “dirty” and I had to choose to stop getting embarrassed about a huge scar that runs up an intimate part of my body and warning people to stop them from being shocked by it.

For me, this was a long journey in which I have lost and found myself many many times, but finally, sex became meaningful, intense and powerful. For me, I became more open and willing to try things that before this happened I would have never even considered. I explored myself first, I learnt what I liked about myself and how my body reacted, I learnt to love myself first not in the sense that I liked the way I looked but in the sense that I listened to my body and emotions. My self-discovery is where I learnt to trust my gut feeling and to never let what I went through dictate the rest of my life. I chose to not hate all men but to trust my own instincts, which might I add didn’t have a 100% strike rate! But I learnt and that’s the main thing!

Trust exercises, goals, boundaries these are all the things in therapy you are told to write down and think about. These don’t mean just with a partner these also relate to yourself, and how you build your journey into intimacy. Sexual healing takes patience and don’t ever do something until you are ready for it emotionally and physically. For a very long time my mind and my body were disconnected, every time I chose to have sex I did not enjoy it because my body and mind would constantly disassociate. This was my greatest hurdle because feeling meant triggering “that feeling” and I can’t tell you how many times I burst into tears during and after sex. But each time I did I grew and I evolved and I became stronger!

Loving Couple Hugging
Photo: Couple Touching Each Other Passionately

There are plenty of supportive, understanding partners out there, but there are also people who are going to make you feel like their sexual needs are more important than your safety needs. Being able to address your history on your own timeline, without having to even consider anyone else, is a wonderful benefit. It may take you some time to fully process this experience, and it may continue to surface in surprising and frustrating ways. But don’t let this person steal your chance for joy and intimacy. If you have the desire to learn how to enjoy sex (and again, you don’t have to), you can get there.

My most favourite quote which I tattooed onto my body is “you never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have”.

Learn, grow, feel, and most importantly discover yourself first!

About the author: Morgan is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres

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Sexpert is our resident full time sex blogger. Having successfully owned and managed a number of blogs relating to women's lifestyle, she easily blended into her role as chief blogger of the Adultsmart Blog. She is in a long term relationship with her boyfriend. She also runs Good Girl Guide, a sexual lifestyle blog.
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