Sex During Pregnancy: A Complete Guide to Pregnant Sex

It’s easy to forget sometimes the reason we have sex. Nature wants us to procreate and have babies. Unlike most living things on the planet though, nature made it fun for us too and extremely pleasurable. Nowadays thankfully we can make the most of our liberal societies and science and have as much of it as we like without necessarily ending up with a baby at the end of it. Most of us though at one point in our lives will follow the action through to its natural consequence and decide to actually have one. What happens then? When you are pregnant, is it OK to carry on having sex during pregnancy?

Yes and No and Here’s Why 

I thought the answer to that would be yes, but I found out occasionally that isn’t true.

In general though it can be a great time to have sexual intercourse. The pressure is off for one thing. No more need for contraception.  It maybe the case that sex has been all about having babies. And not so much about the fun part, so it can be better because of that too.

Men can feel a bit left out at this time when it is all about the pregnancy and the woman. So it is good to make a bit of extra effort to keep that side of things alive in pregnancy and sex.

Sex during Pregnancy 

It’s a bit different for lots of reasons. A pregnant woman’s blood volume increases and engorges the sexual organs increasing sensitivity and improving orgasms.

And obviously, breasts can grow to gargantuan sizes. Libido is something that will definitely have an impact, your man might be constantly horny because of your huge breasts and a lot of men find pregnant women very attractive.

Pregnant women can positively bloom, with brighter eyes better skin and thicker hair. The fluctuating hormones can make a woman’s sex drive go through the roof once the first months are over. Couples report having more sex in the last 6 months of pregnancy than they ever had before. Lots of women experience very vivid erotic dreams too.

sex during pregnancy
Photo: Sex & Pregnancy

It isn’t his way for all couples though.

58% of women suffer with decreased sex drive and are nauseous and tired for the first months. Often men either find the pregnant body non-sexual. Many even feel strange going near the baby with a penis in any way or else feel the baby is somehow watching.

Worries about somehow hurting the baby are common.

It is impossible, the baby is not in the vagina and there is a cervix and an amniotic sac of fluid between everything. No matter how well-endowed a man is, he is never going to bump the baby.

They do say that although oral sex is fine you shouldn’t blow air into the vagina as it may cause an air embolism in rare cases. Sex toys and lubricant’s are all fine just be extra careful when it comes to hygiene as any kind of infection can be bad news for a developing baby. Oral sex with someone who has had a cold sore is out in the last three months as if the mother is infected she will need a C-section.

Some Reasons to Lay Off Sex During Pregnancy

There are as I mentioned a couple of situations that may mean laying off sex altogether. If there is a risk of miscarriage or preterm birth or a doctor puts the mother on bed rest, then the contractions and hormones produced while actually orgasming can bring on labour. They use the same chemicals to induce labours in hospital as the body naturally produces during sex. If the baby isn’t ready to come though, you can go at it like rabbits and not worry.

Positions to Have Sex in Change

Sex positions for pregant women will change too because of the shape of the woman and the weight of the stomach. Doggy style, side by side and woman on top are probably most commonly used. As well as the exterior shape the cervix maybe lower down and deep penetration might be uncomfortable. Doctors don’t usually advise a woman to lay for long on her back in the later stages as the uterus can press against the heart veins and restrict blood flow to the baby.

Once the baby arrives

You will be able to resume your usual habits after the 6 week check-up. Some women feel like it will hurt their traumatised vagina which is completely understandable and the extra oestrogen produced for breast-feeding can dry out the vagina. Although you can buy creams to help that.

On top of all this there is the stress and inevitable fatigue that go hand in hand with any new baby. Post-natal depression is also a reality for some women.

All a couple can do is wait until everything feels OK again.

There is no normal time for that to happen. Nothing good will ever come from putting pressure on each other and it will eventually all be back to normal, it has to be, otherwise we would all stop having babies and nature doesn’t want that to happen.

A Guide to Better Sex During Pregnancy

Pregnancy is a unique and transformative period, teeming with physical, emotional, and hormonal changes. While some women might experience a heightened sex drive, others may observe the opposite.

This comprehensive guide seeks to demystify the concerns, misconceptions, and benefits of sex during pregnancy.  Empowering prospective parents to navigate the realm of intimacy with greater confidence and understanding.

First Trimester: Understanding Your Sex Drive

During the initial phase of pregnancy, a woman’s sex drive can fluctuate unpredictably. Primarily due to hormonal changes and pregnancy symptoms. Some women might experience an increased libido, while others may notice a decline in their sexual interest.

Factors Affecting Sex Drive

Several factors can impact a woman’s sex drive during the first trimester of pregnancy:

  1. Nausea and Fatigue: The common pregnancy symptoms of nausea and tiredness can diminish a woman’s interest in sex.
  2. Fear of Miscarriage: Some couples might abstain from sex due to the fear of harming the unborn baby or causing a miscarriage.
  3. Body Image Concerns: Changes in the body can impact a woman’s self-perception and potentially affect her interest in sex.

However, it’s crucial to note that, unless explicitly advised by a healthcare provider, sex during pregnancy is generally safe and does not increase the risk of miscarriage.

 Second Trimester: A Time of Rekindled Intimacy

As pregnancy progresses into the second trimester, many couples experience a revival in their sex life. Women may find that their libido increases as they become more comfortable with their changing bodies.

Benefits of Sex During the Second Trimester

Sex during the second trimester can offer several benefits:

  1. Increased Libido: Some women might experience a heightened sex drive during this phase of pregnancy.
  2. Boosted Self-Image: Sex can help pregnant women feel more comfortable and confident in their changing bodies.
  3. Enhanced Intimacy: Sex can foster a deeper emotional and physical connection with your partner.

Experimenting with New Sexual Positions

The second trimester can also be an opportune time to experiment with new sexual positions that accommodate the growing belly. Some potential positions include spooning, with the woman lying on her side and her partner behind her, or the woman-on-top position, offering more control over the movements and depth of penetration.

sexual health in pregnany and beyond
Women and Sexual Health

Third Trimester: Adjusting to Your Changing Body

As pregnancy advances into the third trimester, couples might notice a decrease in their sexual activity. The growing belly can make certain sexual positions uncomfortable or even unfeasible.

Adapting to New Sexual Positions

During the third trimester, women might find certain positions, such as side-by-side or rear entry positions, more comfortable. These positions allow for shallower penetration, which can be more comfortable as the pregnancy progresses.

Non-Penetrative Intimacy

Remember, intimacy during pregnancy doesn’t always have to involve penetration. If intercourse becomes uncomfortable during the third trimester, couples can explore other forms of intimacy such as kissing, cuddling, massages, or mutual masturbation.

When to Avoid Sex During Pregnancy

While sex during pregnancy is generally safe, there are certain conditions where a healthcare provider might advise against it:

  1. High-Risk Pregnancy: If the pregnancy is deemed high-risk due to factors like a history of preterm labor or miscarriages, sex might be discouraged.
  2. Placenta Previa: In cases where the placenta covers the cervix, known as placenta previa, sex should be avoided to prevent potential complications.
  3. Premature Rupture of Membranes: If the amniotic sac ruptures prematurely, sex can increase the risk of infections.

Using Sex for Natural Induction

Some couples might use sex as a natural method to induce labor, although there’s no conclusive evidence to support its effectiveness. However, unless advised otherwise by a healthcare provider, couples can continue having sex throughout the ninth month right up until the onset of labor.

Protecting Your Baby and Yourself

Even though you’re pregnant, it’s still crucial to protect yourself from sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) that could potentially harm you and your baby. If you or your partner has multiple sexual partners, using condoms or other barrier methods can provide protection against STDs.

Final Thoughts

Sex during pregnancy can be a sensitive and often misunderstood topic. This guide aims to provide clarity and alleviate any concerns prospective parents might have. It’s crucial to remember that every woman’s experience with pregnancy and sex is unique.

Always listen to your body, communicate openly with your partner, and consult with your healthcare provider to ensure a safe and satisfying sex life during pregnancy.

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