20 Benefits Of Sex Toys

If you have never experienced a mind-blowing orgasm at all or if you have but you still feel unsatisfied with your sex life, you will love using a sex toy. A sex toy is a device used as a sexual health aid to facilitate sexual pleasure. The first known sex toy was excavated from the ruins of Pompeii in Rome which was a hand-carved dildo. This means that sex toys have been used for well over 2 thousand years.

In the 19th century sex toys were used as a way to treat sexual health problems in women which was known as “female hysteria”. They were publicized in the Sears and Roebuck as a “woman’s guide for female issues”.

The popularisation of sex toys

Acceptance of sexual freedom sprang from the sexual revolution of the 60’s and 70’s and then in the 90’s one of the most infamous scenes on TV in the series Sex In The City had the character Charlotte being taken to a sex shop and purchasing her first Rabbit Vibrator.  Once she became acquainted with the toy she could not drag herself away from using it.

Over time sex toys have become extremely popular and are now available in various shapes, sizes, materials and colors. They are also recommended by medical health specialists like doctors, psychologists and sex therapists for people to achieve sexual wellness and maintain a healthy lifestyle.

A survey of 2056 women between the ages of 18 to 60 showed that 60% of them owned a sex toy.  The use of sex toys for solo masturbation and during couples play has now become socially acceptable with people openly discussing the topic in a sex positive manner.

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Benefits of using sex toys

Have you ever asked yourself the question:

“Why should I use sex toys?”

Using sex toys could be the next step to making your sexual lifestyle that much more pleasurable. In fact, sex toys have many benefits including:

Sex toys improve personal health

Scientists have proven that when a person orgasms hormones which are responsible for controlling mood like oxytocin and dopamine are released into the body. These hormones activate reward systems inside your brain.  Orgasming boosts the immune system, reduce pain, depression, tension, restlessness, lethargy and stress which all help to improve sleep and mood. In turn you will also experience a heightened mood, an improved sense of well-being and increased levels of sexual satisfaction. Not only is it fun and pleasurable but it is also healthy. When you feel relieved without any stress pulsing through your body, you can begin to relax and unwind after a stressful day, week or month.

Men can learn how to increase their sexual stamina

When a man uses a masturbator he can teach himself how to slowly increase his sexual stamina so he can last for longer periods of time during masturbation or sex. He will gain the confidence that he can make sex with his partner a more enjoyable experience and this will make him and his partner happier in the long run.

Women can learn how to have multiple orgasms

It is no secret that women can have multiple orgasms in a row in a short period of time. Women can use sex toys so they can get pleasurable stimulation for a higher chance of giving themselves multiple orgasms.

Women can build their pelvic floor muscles

There are also sex toys which are used a sexual health aids like Kegel Exercisers. Kegel Exercisers are used by women who need to build up their pelvic floor muscles. Some Kegel Exercisers also vibrate for added pleasure.

Sex toys help people achieve orgasms without the effort

Whether you purchase a sex toy which is battery operated or rechargeable, they will do almost all the work for you. Sit back and relax as you allow the stimulation of the sex toy to please you, with simple movements of your hand you will be in 7th Heaven. As you build up your orgasm you are able to increase the strength or change the modes so that it best suits what you need. You also don’t have to worry about finishing your sessions faster as the sex toy will help do most of the work for you.

Sex toys build your personal autonomy

Sex toys can help both men and women achieve orgasm through solo masturbation without the help of another person. Learning the how your body work and the best way to orgasm can give you confidence. Sex toys are a powerful way of achieving orgasm and can easily match the pleasurable experience of a real sexual partner.

There are lots of situations where one person may ‘want to’ have sex but the other person ‘cannot’ or ‘does not’. In these circumstances the sex toys can be used for solo masturbation.

Sex toys help people gain the self confidence to experiment

When a person understands how their body functions they are more likely to experiment. If you find that your lover could use a little bit of self-confidence consider buying him or her a sex toy as a perfect gift.

Sex toys help to increases sexual arousal

Watching your lover use a sex toy and seeing their sexual desire grow is a major turn on for a lot of people. A survey conducted by the Cosmopolitan magazine states that most men love to use female vibrators on their female counterparts. They find it hot and kinky. Using sex toy’s on their sexual partner can be super exciting especially if the sex toy is sending heightened amounts of stimulation. Sex toys will build up the ultimate type of climax which will be visually appealing towards their partner. There are concerns that sex toys have a desensitizing affect on women. Again, this isn’t true. Think of sex toys as a tool to use to improve your orgasms.

Sex toys make sex amazing

The act of sex is about as old as time and a part of human nature. It goes under many names including “making love” and “hooking up” . Sex is no longer considered only an act for mating and reproduction but is also seen as something fun and exciting. What couple doesn’t want to experience amazing sex? If you are having amazing sex, you will probably end up having more sex to which means you are gaining something no matter which way you choose to look at it! Stacy Rybchin of My Secret Luxury said:

“Everybody could have more sex — it really is great!”

Sex toys are great to add to sexual intercourse and can be used in different sexual positions. Although some people worry that their partner will find sex toys threatening and may feel inadequate when they compare themselves to the sex to. It doesn’t have to be the case if you don’t allow it. Make the sex toy a tool that the both of you can share and use in your sexual experiences. They can actually help couples enjoy an adventurous sex life and enhance pleasure to levels you never thought possible.

These days, you are also able to purchase sex toys specifically made for use during penetrative sex. One of the most famous couple’s vibrator available is made by adult lifestyle company Standard Innovation Corporation who produce a product known as the We-Vibe Sync. The We-Vibe is worn during penetrative sex by the woman, it allows the man to freely penetrate the vagina as it delivers different strengths and patterns of vibration.

You can also use a men’s masturbator during foreplay. Allow your lover to take complete control of the men’s masturbator so they are in charge of the pleasure. Stacy Rybchin said:

“Male sex toys will help a man or couples to flavour things up and have an assortment of intimate encounters in the bedroom.”

Likewise, you can also purchase vibrators for women too!

Sex toys bring new experiences to the bedroom

Sex toys will enhance your sexual lifestyle and allow you to try something new. Having a great sex life means being open to the idea on trying new things. Even great sex can get boring if you stay in a repetitive routine. Using sex toys in the bedroom is one way to spice up your sex life, they will add a sense of adventure and excitement. Sex toys are an excellent option because they enable us to explore our sexuality on new levels and find new ways to experience pleasure. Naturally new experiences with a lover will strengthen the relationship to become much stronger.

You don’t have to use sex toys every time you have sex but doing so it can excite your imagination and make things better. Sex toys can do things that body parts can’t do. For example, if you get a dildo with a harness, you can penetrate your lover and at the same time use your hands on other parts of her or his body.

With experimentation there is not a wrong way to learn, you just have to give it your best and see how it goes. You can not fail when you are experimenting. You are just learning how things work and how things don’t work which will improve your sexual techniques over time.

Sex toys don’t run out of breath

It doesn’t matter how many times you orgasms your sex toy won’t run out of breath. It also doesn’t matter if you are tired or orgasms quickly, you can use a sex toy on a lover during foreplay which will make sex last for a long period of time. Use the sex toy to take frequent breaks so that you are able to relax, prevent fatigue, prevent cramping and delay orgasms.

Sex toys take away the pressure to perform

Did you know that around 75 percent of women can’t achieve climax through penetrative sex and almost 50 percent of women have faked an orgasm? Men are said to have higher levels of sexual satisfaction when compared with women. These statistics are quite shocking and are one of the very reasons why sex can become so stressful. Let’s face it, the best type of sex ends in a wonderful and blissful orgasm. Stacy Rybchin said:

“In the event that you utilize sex toys, your odds of achieving a climax increment significantly. Most ladies need clitoral incitement to climax. That is the reason sex toys (vibrators particularly) are a brilliant approach to help you peak.”

Sexually fulfilled happy couple
Image: Happy Couple

Sex toys assist in long distance relationships

Sex toys are great for experiencing phone or internet sex. You may be far away from your girlfriend but you want her to feel your touch. You can talk over the phone or through the internet and the same time share a fantasy with each other. Use the sex toys to feel the touches and imagine that she is touching you.

Sex toys assist people with disabilities

Sex toys are often used as a sexual health aid by people who have a disability. They help to improve a person’s quality of life

Sex toys make masturbation easier as they are designed to find your erogenous zones

Sex toys are ergonomically designed to find the pinpoint location of your erogenous zones. For example, if you buy a g-spot vibrator or a prostate massager it will be curved to find that precise location so that you don’t have to spend too much time fumbling around looking for it yourself.

Sex toys can help you achieve different types of orgasms

It you can easily experience multiple orgasms (if you use them creatively). You can achieve almost any type of orgasm available. Sex toys are able to help you to know you more about your inner self! You may not know your real sexual power until you explore your body for yourself.

Sex toys assist people with sexual dysfunction

Sex toys are a temporary tool to support sexually dysfunctional ladies attain climax.

Sex toys are easily transportable

There are sex toys that are travel sized and lockable so they don’t accidentally turn on when they are in your bag. You can take sex toys when you are on holidays, traveling on a business trip or going over to someones house.

Sex toys help your lover explore your body

If you allow your lover to use a sex toy on your body, it gives them the time to find out what really turns you on. Some people learn faster when they have practical experience and can see visually what turns their lover on. You can also show your lover the best ways to use the sex toy, he/she will be able to replicate the experience in no time, causing you to moan in pleasure. On the other hand, when you choose to experiment together, you might discover new ways on how to use the sex toy to experience even more pleasure.

You can find affordable and high end sex toys

There is a massive range of selection of sex toys that have different qualities and functionalities.

How do I choose a sex toy?

There are so many sex toys out there, choosing the best product for you can be a challenging task. Here are some questions you will need to ask yourself so that you are able to find a sex toy which suits your personal needs:

  • What erogenous zone/s would you like to stimulate? There are sex toys designed to stimulate different erogenous zones like the prostate, perineum, penis, g-spot, a-spot and u-spot. Your very first step is to determine what erogenous zones you would like the sex toy to stimulate.
  • Who will you use the sex toy with? There are sex toys which are made for solo masturbation or for couples play.
  • Would you like it to look realistic? There are sex toys which are designed to look like realistic body parts and sex toys which are ergonomically designed to look like a modern product.
  • What is your budget?  You should choose a budget that you would like to spend on a sex toy.
  • What functions would you like the sex toy to have? Would you like your sex toy to vibrate, pulsate or rotate. Other functions include warming, massage beads, dual stimulation, suction cups and whether it is battery operated or rechargeable.
  • What brand would you prefer to own? Do thorough research on the top selling sex toy brands and read product reviews before placing your order. Some popular brands include LELO, Fun Factory, JimmyJane, We-Vibe and Fleshlight.
  • What’s your size preferences and skill set: For some sex toys like butt plugs you will need to define what size sex toy you would be most comfortable with. To do this you can compare the sizes of the current sex toys you use or if you are a beginner you can use smaller sized sex toys and work your way up to bigger sized sex toys.
  • What material would you like your sex toy made with? When you are choosing your sex toy ensure that you choose a product that is body safe and does not contain toxic chemicals. When choosing your sex toy’s material you will need to also consider whether you have any allergies.

Other products you may need with your purchase

  • Personal Lubricant: You will need to find a sex toy friendly lubricant. Water-based lubricant can be used with almost all sex toys whereas other products like Silicone-based lubricant may deteriorate sex toys that are made with silicone.
  • Antibacterial Sex Toy Cleaner: A lot of people may rush to buy a sex toy but it also needs to be properly taken care of. After you have used your sex toy you will need to clean it. Antibacterial sex toy cleaner is a safe option to use on your products to keep them hygienic especially if you are using sex toys that are made with materials that are considered to be porous like cyberskin, rubber and jelly.
  • Mild Antibacterial Soap: Some people may choose to use mild antibacterial soap and some luke warm water to clean their sex toys. After you use the soap and water, ensure that their is no residue left behind on the sex toy from the soap. This will prevent any irritation to your body during use or damage to the sex toy’s material.
  • Condoms: If for some reason you do buy a toxic sex toy it is recommended to use a condom on the sex toy to prevent any harmful chemicals getting in contact with your skin.
  • Arousal And Excite Sprays, Creams And Ointments: If you need some help becoming aroused or would like some extra stimulation investing in arousal and excite products can help build your levels of sexual arousal naturally.
  • Adult DVDs: If you are a person is more likely to orgasm through visual stimulation or by listening to dirty talk or sounds you can invest in an Adult DVD.

Where do I purchase sex toys?

Sex toys can be purchased online or at online sex toy stores or at physical sex toy stores like at an Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centre.

Online sex toy stores and privacy

The big concern for sex toy shopping is privacy. Most people don’t feel comfortable buying sex toys in front of other people. To overcome this situation, online shopping would be one of the best options for them. Shopping  online allows you to browse their products in complete confidentiality, no one will know that you are looking at, except for you. You are able to read the descriptions of the products and the features that they offer, this way you can pick something which is best suited to fit you personally or your relationship.

Purchasing them is a simple process, when you are ready add the products to your shopping cart. Fill out your details and process the payment. Your order will then be sent to a warehouse, packaged and sent out through their shipping services like DHL or Australia Post.

Physical sex toy stores

You can travel to a  physical sex toy store which is nearby to where you live. Adult stores are no longer located in dark alleys but they are found on main streets and even located in glitzy shopping malls. Most places have a sign or banner outside which let you know that it is a sex toy store and a staircase which leads up to the shop itself, this way the public cannot see who and what is inside. You are then able to freely shop and ask the consultant any questions about the products that you come across.

How do I introduce sex toys to a relationship?

Having a conversation about intimacy and sexual performance is almost always a sensitive topic especially when people’s egos can be quite fragile. Many people are scared that sex toys will replace them during mutual masturbation or sex. This however is not true, sex toys enhance people’s sexual lifestyle making the act more enjoyable, they also assist both lovers to reach climax and orgasm.

It most likely will probably not be an easy chat but when two lovers engage in an honest and thoughtful conversation the chances of improving your sex life and the quality of your relationship will increase. If you are planning on introducing a sex toy into a relationship, April Masini a relationship specialist who is also the founder of AskApril recommended:

“In the event that you think your accomplice will be anxious or reject your proposal of utilizing a sex toy, don’t pop it out of a container after you’ve both stripped. Begin discussing it little by little in non-sexual situations, as over espresso in a café. What’s more, don’t present it as a win big or bust suggestion. There is nothing that feels more like sexual weight than an accomplice who says, ‘alright, this is what we’re doing next.’ For instance, when your accomplice is in a decent state of mind or cheerful about something you’ve been liberal about, remind him or her that you’d truly get a kick out of the chance to attempt a specific thing.”

Talk with your lover and decide on what types of sex toys you both would like to introduce into the relationship. Find sex toys that you both agree on and feel comfortable with. When two of you decide to buy sex toy, it will be good to start with something simple. For example, if you are a woman you can use a vibrator or if you are a man you can use a masturbator. Using something without to many functionalities will help you to discover and explore each others bodies.  Start slowly with sex toys to give you an idea of what you like and how far you want to go with them.

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Roulla was a contributor on the adultsmart blog in 2014. She has since returned to her homeland in Greece where she has taken up a career in hairdressing. We wish her well.

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