Cuckoldress Training Essentials

I’ve mentioned in a previous article about how masculinity is synonymous with having a larger dick – which actually, in a round a bout way, brings us to a new kinky fetish called Cuckolding. If you’ve never heard of it, I’ll be surprised as cuckolding is actually in the top three searches of porn and sexual fetishes. However, despite it being an ancient kink, it is actually quite misunderstood. Cuckolding is specifically described as a male partner becoming aroused and stimulated by the idea or act of his wife enjoying sex with another man. Indeed, it is primarily around this idea that defines cuckolding. The male is not able to participate into the sexual events happening in front of him which forms a sexual denial of sorts. Cuckolding and the act is about producing a particularly psychological feeling. This can be tied in with notions of masculinity and the idea that the husband is fulfilled by having his wife sexually fulfilled by a more masculine man with a larger penis.

It can take on various forms, whether the husband is present in the room or able to witness the act either live, or after the fact, to the slightly more tame version where the wife will retell the story to the husband about how her man-toy fulfilled her in ways her husband could not. In this situation the wife is usually dominant over both of the men and ‘controls’ her husband to the extent that she dictates when and where he will obtain his sexual release. In some cases, cuckolded men will wear chastity devices, and in others she will simply control his ability to be able to sexually relieve himself.

Cuckolded relationships may seem like swingers or open relationships, but they are not. Where as swingers and open relationships allow all partners to develop emotions and feelings towards one another, the expectation within a cuckolded relationship is the separation of sexual pleasure and love. That being, the husband is the sole lover of the wife, whereas she gets her sexual pleasure from someone other than whom she loves. It can be a difficult field to navigate and it primarily relies on the idea of the separation between love and sex. Cuckolding also relies on the emotions and specifically, the emotions that it conveys to the husband of shame and humiliation.

As with any kind of fetish, if it’s something that appeals to you need to carefully approach your partner with your intentions. Whilst looking at cuckold porn might be beneficial, it’s really not going to explore or demonstrate the psychology behind being cuckolded and that’s certainly something you’re going to need to answer in order to successfully incorporate this into your relationship.

Transforming your partner into a cuckold can be one of the best things you ever do. An effectively cuckolded spouse will be totally meek and mild towards you. He will fulfill all your sexual yearnings, deal with all the ordinary tasks of your life, permit you to lay down with whomever you wish, subject himself to any measure of embarrassment you demand, and obviously, adore you unequivocally.  Training a cuckold may also be one of the most difficult things you ever do in your life. The procedure is, convoluted, vitality devouring, and in no way, shape or form beyond the realms of failure. The strain on your relationship initially will be incredible, and it might be weeks or months even years before you succeed. At last however, it will be justified, despite all the trouble of cuckold training.

This is a guide to instruct ladies on the most proficient method to start the grand trip of female mastery and to ideally assuage a percentage of the fear that may keep a lady from attempting this training. You may find after reading this it will be clearer that cuckolding your spouse is not as hard as it appears, and that finishing this accomplishment is more than conceivable, more so than you suspected.

The most well-known reason ladies don’t cuckold their partner is that she supposes he’ll never put it all on the line – that he’s not the sort. This is such a myth, to the point that it must be debunked instantly. Numerous cuckolds start as normal spouses. Your spouse may even be as masculine as men come, yet don’t stress, cuckolding is regularly simply a question of helping your partner find his accommodating side. Take heart in the way that underneath all his machismo and pride, there is a weakling that is beseeching you to drive him to do a wide range of things that will undermine him and empower you.

Consider cuckolding an aptitude, a skill. For the wife who chooses to cuckold her spouse, she must have complete authority and specific abilities. Much like in any calling – she must go to class, read, and practice. So like an expert, before you ever start preparing your spouse, you should first prepare yourself. You’re going to go on an inconceivable adventure; you need to be fully prepared to undertake the journey otherwise you will just not make it and it could be the failure of your relationship, isn’t that so?

The universe of cuckolding is not at all like the ordinary world. It has different standards, rules and traditions that are not the same as ordinary life, of which you must be mindful and aware. You must submerge yourself in this new culture. To start, begin perusing stories involved with cuckolding. There are numerous articles and stories of those who have cuckolded their spouses and recorded their encounters. Men also write about how becoming cuckolded has made live easier know that there is a female in command. Gain from them, learn from them. These stories will familiarize you to the new universe of cuckolding and will keep you from making mistakes along the way. There are books on females in command, and purchase books or videos of dominatrix’s embarrassing men.

Likewise prepare yourself to be sexually free. In the event that you need to control your spouse you have to not require his penis. Later on you should deny your spouse the joys of your body and this will ensure that he becomes enslaved in your essence. Sex with your partner will be presumably really vanilla at any rate in case you’re going to be cuckolding him, so it shouldn’t be too hard. Masturbate regularly. Spend lavishly on vibrators, dildos, salves, attire, and erotica. Have good times! Visit your neighborhood sex shop and request their thoughts and advice. You might likewise need to consider purchasing toys that after you satisfy yourself, you can use on your spouse once he’s legitimately prepared. The key is at whatever point you truly have the inclination for a fucking, prepare yourself to look for fulfillment from a source other than your spouse initially. Case in point, when you’re horny, take out your vibrator. His chastity is part of your supreme power.

A decent approach to assist your preparation is to change your appearance. Make it your objective to turn into a hot wife. The prime center of a hot wife is communicating her sexuality in all conduct, from the sort of shoes she wears to the way she shaves her pussy. A hot wife wears tight fitting garments as much as she can. She wears short skirts, scent, and high-heels constantly. She does her hair and wears cosmetics day by day. During the evening she wears hot unmentionables. She goes out frequently. When she goes to the market she doesn’t wear underclothing. In the event that you begin doing thing like these, not just will you be sending a sign to your partner that you’ve changed, you’ll also be sending a sign to yourself. Since you resemble a hot wife, you’ll believe you’re a hot wife, and after that you’ll be a hot wife! The points of interest to being a hot wife are various. You’re partner will desire for you significantly more and other men will murmur over you and your sexual vitality will build, all of which you can channel into brute force. You will be one step further to being a true cuckoldress.

Likewise don’t hesitate to begin being a tease. It’s most likely been quite a while since you’ve played with another man, so you’ll need practice. Look at men without flinching and grin. Drop something in the workplace, twist around without bowing your knees, let others see your perfect ass and G-String or better still with no panties. During the evening go out with lady friends that like to pick-up. Make it an objective to play with the desire of men each day. Not just will it be extremely fulfilling to realize that there are other men out there who lust on you, you will also note that in the back of your psyche you can utilize this information as influence against your spouse.

Once you’ve legitimately taught yourself the correct way to behave yourself as a cuckoldress, finding freedom from your partners cock, and ensured that you are committed to cuckold training, it’s now the opportunity to start.

 

No Sex
Quote: There is No Sex in Heaven

 

Like most things it is the beginning that is going to be the most difficult and your future cuckold may initially give you resistance. Regardless of the admission that he needs to be your slave, he will initially stand up to and test your resolve and his boundaries – this is a natural thing to do. There are reasons he will do this like the years between you that he has been the alpha bull, what society has made him perceive as normal in a relationship, yet most importantly he will need let go of his dignity when in your company allowing him to be totally dominated by you. Not just would he be able to not admit to you that he needs to be your cuckold, he will resist admitting it to himself. He will never simply give you control over him despite the fact that he needs to and wants you to. This would damage his previous role as the masculine or alpha person in your relationship. You have to train him – take it from him – it’s the correct and only way that you can achieve full control of your cuckold.

The initial training may be fiery and difficult but good things often do not come easily. You have to know what your rightful place is and let him know where he is expected to stand. Failure to do this will result in unnecessary turmoil and prolong the training period that is the most painful. Both he and you may feel uncomfortable and vulnerable as you are changing the way previously you saw the world and how relationships were supposed to be. You may double yourself thinking you may be too hard on him but remember it is better to be cruel to be king than allow doubt and turmoil to fester and continue. To have doubt initially is totally understandable and most dominatrix’s and cuckoldresses will experience this. However you must realize that your doubt and instability is half of what he may be feeling so an iron fist and resolve is required for ultimate clarity of what your relationship is expected to be. You cannot share any doubt with him as that will cause uncertainty in his mind and make your position vulnerable by showing weakness. That is not to say that you cannot on occasion be kind to him or reward him for proper behavior as all training requires rewards and punishment.

Remember that all things in the future of your relationship will be at your suggestion or command. Your cuckold’s input should not influence your decisions unless they complement them or you agree with them. At the commencement of cuckold training your cuckold should be required to go through a period of chastity so you can reinforce that you do not require his cock. That your supreme womanhood would not be given to him, that he will only ever experience as a reward for performing all his cuckold duties or when you require to be serviced.

Also remember that you have to train him that your needs are more important than his. A good way to reinforce this and display this to him is to introduce a bull or other cuckoldress into your relationship. It is so important that when this first happens you explain what is required of him – full male chastity. You may or may not allow him to watch you but he cannot participate – at first – so that he knows his position in the food chain. If you introduce a bull into your relationship he must treat them with respect and an appropriate reference such as master or sir should be used by him when addressing him.

It is so important that total male chastity be adhered to in these initial stages and if you believe he is secretly stroking off a suitable male chastity device should be placed on your cuckold. He must understand that his sexual needs or wants are not important – that he is there to service you and nothing more.

Once he has realized that his needs are no longer important in your house you need to re-enforce this by being mean. This is an important stage of the training as he is not simply going to give you complete control of himself. Basically you are going to be so mean to him that you will break his spirit and once broken you can rebuild it with rewards into exactly what you desire from him and the relationship. This is actually the hardest part of training as society has taught you to be nice to others, to be fair, to respect others and now you are going to break down these barriers. To be honest most cuckoldresses find this the most difficult part of the training and the part that self-doubt rears its ugly head – but you need to finish this portion of the training so that your future relationship will be successful.

Begin by demoralizing him. Tell him that you no longer need his cock. Tell his cock is too small or smells or is ugly. Feminize him, is his name is Robert call him Robina. Make him wear woman’s lingerie under his clothing. Babbify him. Point out all his shortcomings, call him names, emphasize that no other woman would ever want him, tell him how lucky he has to have you. Explain to him that for you to have any foreseeable future he must totally obey and give himself to you. He must no longer call you by name when you are not in public. He must call you Ma’am, Mistress, Queen or Goddess. He must ask permission to speak with you and if he is commanded to answer you he must use your appropriate title. This will emphasize to him that he is the cuckold, slave, subordinate in the relationship.  Make him do things that are gross or he does not want to do. Do not shower for a number of days and then make him go down on you, licking your aromatic womanhood clean. Make him lie on your bed to warm it up and then when you go to bed make him sleep on the floor next to you or in the spare room. Get him to make the bed in the morning and the pull of all the sheets make him do it again. Point out all his imperfections in his chores. Break him down so that you can then build him up with rewards.

Don’t rush the being mean process it is essential that you become comfortable and it become second nature to you. It will assert your position in the relationship and reinforce his. You are equally training yourself to be a dominatrix, terrifying, unattainable, beautiful to your partner. Make strict rules and enforce them ruthlessly, eventually your man will beg to please you in each and every way. If he fails you or his task in any way be ruthless, punish him so he realizes that not taking on his role seriously will eventuate in consequences.

Punishment can take many forms dependent on what is comfortable to you. You can be passively aggressive by denying him all forms of contact including sexual. Sending him to Coventry where there is no allowed communication from him. Make him voiceless and powerless. Or you can be aggressive – you may choose to spank him or bind him or other forms of physical punishment. Finally you can punish him by having him carry out demeaning acts. Make him masturbate in front of you and then eat his own semen, go to the toilet and make him clean the scat from you ass when you finish. You can take punishment to any extreme you want – remember you are in control and again you must rule with an iron fist initially until you have the boundaries you require set.

Equally it is important to reward your cuckold when he does all the things you require of him well. There must be benefits in the relationship to your partner. However you will notice that the positive impact of you being nice will be vastly different as in a regular relationship. Your cuckold will become excited, he will beam with pleasure, his attitude and demeanor will shine. He will be more willing to perform all tasks correctly in the hope of more rewards.

Rewards could be as simple as removing a previous punishment. For example if you have required him to a long period of male chastity you can release his chastity device and allow him to self-pleasure himself for 24 hours, or if you so desire you can allow him to have sex with you. You can allow him special treats like sleeping beside you one evening – it may be as simple as allowing him to eat with you. Your being mean to him will lower the standard he requires you to be nice to him. It will become easy to please him and reward him if you have carried out the being mean training period proficiently.

 

Cuckold Fetish
Photo: Cuckoldress

 

 

You cannot be nice to your cuckold until you have fully developed the grounds for meanness that can take anywhere from a few weeks to months depending how easily your cuckold is trained and how mean you are. The stricter and meaner you are the quicker this period of training will be completed. When you graduate to the being nice stage never allow the boundaries placed in your relationship to change – he will still address you in the correct manner by saying Maam, Mistress or whatever term you have required. You can be nice ‘in the future’ as well to ensure correct behavior is followed. For example you may offer him a blowjob at the end of the week if he behaves appropriately and carries out all his tasks. You will be surprised how enthusiastic he will be at doing the most mundane of tasks.

The value to him of your rewards will grow in significance to him as your cuckold relationship ages. It is all about vinegar and honey. He needs to be rewarded for good behavior and punished for bad behavior. One word of warning though, you must ensure that your cuckolded male is not actually enjoying the punishment you are inflicted and must identify this quickly if it is becoming the case. Some men enjoy being beaten so this may actually be a reward not a punishment. But always you must be in control and the dominant in the relationship. Once you have mastered his punishment and his reward you must identify how to pleasure yourself.

By now you should be ready to progress to the next and possibly most important lesson. By now boundaries and understanding should be in place so now it is time to train your cuckold to understand his purpose in life. His purpose is to obviously please you. The reason for his being is to please mistress above anything else. Going out with his friends should be discouraged, buying things for himself like that new car should be tailored to buy a new 3 carat ring for you. Going out fishing forget about that it is time to put another load of launder on. His drive should be for your pleasure.

Take advantage of him, it will give you more time to have your hair and nails done. If you have kids you no longer have to worry about them as your cuckold will look after them whilst you go out on dates with other men. Now he is not buying any mens sex toys you will have more time and money to go shopping and enjoy yourself. Make yourself that hot wife he always desired.

It is now time to set the conditions of your relationship. In cuckolded relationship you can make ‘trades’ for rewards as nothing should come easily to your cuckold or he will not appreciate it as much. For example if your cuckold has done all his chores for the week and his reward is to be able to let him eat your pussy. You can add a further condition to this reward by indicating to him that although you know his reward for good behavior is to eat your pussy but the added condition to this is that he fuck you but after he fucks you he has to eat all his own cum out of your pussy. By implementing additional conditions it will allow him to see that there is more involved than his momentary pleasure, in that he has to perform another task for you. So it is never about him, but about your pleasure, your terms and your conditions.

After the first time you implement conditions you will find it is easier each time to do it and to force him to do degrading acts. It is also always good to have your cuckold fucked either by you wearing a strap-on or getting one of your bulls to take him. He must be made to understand that he no longer is a bull and can be used as a implement for others pleasure. This is the final training step and milestone to reach. You may do this in tandem with getting him to dress as a woman or babbify him. Fucking him in the ass will be the final barrier to a complete surrendered cuckold.

Conditions should only be used for a period of time necessary for him to surrender himself totally to you. Once he has given up his ass you know you are in complete control and then the boundaries are set forever. Overuse of conditions may have the opposite effect of strengthening your power position.

All your hard-work should now have paid off and have him trained as a true cuckold. It is now time for you to put your feet up and enjoy the relationship. Knowing that your each and every whim will be catered for and like is only about your enjoyment. He will never want to stray from you, he will adore and glorify you. But remember also that that comes with a cost. You now have the responsibility of another human being and all life decisions have been passed onto you. His sole purpose is your happiness so you must give him every opportunity to provide him the ability to do this. This will mean that you will be continually looking for new opportunities for him to do this. You must make him grateful to serve you.

 

About the Author:  Stephen is a consultant at the Adult Lifestyle Centre, Caringbah.

Stephen is a cis-gendered gay male who spends far too much time with his two cats and eating tim tams. A self-identified sex-positive advocate he cares deeply about gender equality, disabilities, sexual education and social issues. Opinionated and bold he isn’t afraid to speak his mind and say what others won’t. With a yearning for knowledge and experience in all things relating to sex, he is a prolific writer that has developed the content for a myriad of informative Sexual Health and Wellness websites.

Stephen’s articles and writings tends to focus on social issues, sexual education, queer issues and all things fetish and absurd. He comes qualified with the completion of a double Bachelor degree in Social Sciences and literature, and a Masters in Education.

JOIN OUR NEWSLETTER
Join over 3,000 visitors who are receiving our newsletter and receive a FREE ebook on the Top 10 Sex Toys For 2017.
We hate spam. Your email address will not be sold or shared with anyone else.

One Reply to “Cuckoldress Training Essentials”

Leave a Reply