New to BDSM? Here’s what you should know

bdsm novice

So you’ve read about it, seen it in a movie, or heard a friend talk about their experience. It doesn’t matter how you first encountered it — BDSM is bound to inspire curiosity in everyone who comes across the concept.

 

The truth is, few things in the world are as misconstrued as BDSM. Factors like misrepresentation in movies and the lifestyle’s reputation for being extremely taboo contribute to many misconceptions about it. 

 

If you’re planning to try BDSM yourself, we strongly caution against going into it blindly. Trust us. You want to be as prepared and knowledgeable as possible when you dive into the exhilarating world of BDSM.

 

So before you press check-out on that cart full of naughty costumes and BDSM gear, make sure to read this newbies’ guide.

What is BDSM?

BDSM stands for “bondage, domination, sadism, and masochism, and is an umbrella term for just about any type of power dynamic in the bedroom.

 

So depending on who you are and what types of sexual adventures you’re into, BDSM can mean many things. It can be as simple as light spanking, or it can go as far as elaborate bondage and strict obedience.

 

If you’ve always been dominant in your everyday life, BDSM can offer you an alternate world where you allow someone else to call the shots (and vice versa!). BDSM is big on freedom, experimentation, adventure, and fun. As long as you keep in mind the tips below, you’re bound to have a great experience.

Tips for a great BDSM experience

Discuss consent and boundaries.

What’s the key difference between BDSM and straight-up sexual assault? Consent. Intimate activities should always stem from an agreement regardless of context. The beauty of BDSM is you get to experience things that are considered by many as too taboo. Truly, it’s a judgment-free lifestyle. You can do pretty much anything as long as all participants willingly and explicitly consent to it.


A discussion about personal boundaries is essential to safely enjoy BDSM. Establish what is allowed and what is off-limits before getting frisky with your partner, and make sure to always respect each other’s limits.

A safeword is essential.

All parties involved should understand the risks and take all necessary precautions. One non-negotiable safety measure is the use of a safeword. This word, which is agreed upon beforehand, will serve as a signal to either tone down or completely halt activities if things go too far. 

 

Most suggest using words that you wouldn’t typically say in a sexual situation. For example, people want to be able to say ‘’stop’’ and ‘’no’’ as a part of role-playing without spoiling the fun. 

 

That said, choose your safeword wisely. It can be something as mundane as “yellow” or “noodles” — really, it’s up to you!

Be open and honest.

Communication is vital in BDSM. You should be comfortable enough to talk about your desires and fantasies. Conversely, no-go’s and turn-offs should also be discussed. BDSM needs openness and honesty to be fully enjoyed.

 

One common mistake we often see beginners make is compromising on their comfort. They allow themselves to be pushed to do things they’re not 100% comfortable with out of fear of being branded a buzzkill. But really, you shouldn’t be engaging with anyone who judges or shames you for your boundaries. 

Start small.

When you’re planning for your first ever BDSM session, it can get tempting to go all-out. Blindfolds and handcuffs? Check! Dirty talk? Check! Whips and lots of rope? Why not?

 

While there’s nothing wrong with pulling out all the stops, we recommend starting small — especially if it’s a first time for both you and your partner. Allow yourself to slowly explore and get a feel for the lifestyle. You can always add more later.

A parting note

Once you’ve got the tips we’ve outlined above down pat, always remember one thing: have lots of fun! BDSM might sound dark and scary, but the truth is, it’s a sexual experience that’s only possible with lots of communication, respect, and care. Good luck!

OnlyFans GigiRose Favorite Bondage Brands

Scandal Bondage

I love being tied up and spanked as much as the next person, however through this adventure of finding my love for all things bondage I’ve struggled to find things that are both durable and sturdy, yet dainty and pretty.

I’m personally a 4’11 woman, so heavy duty thick collars and cuffs just don’t work for me, while they might be strong they usually overtake my body parts leaving me with no wrists and worse – no neck! Which might work for some people but I love to still look and feel sexy while being dominated. This has taken so long to find, usually if things are dainty and pretty they’re not heavy duty and vice versa. The few times you find something dainty but strong it’s probably pink… One of my least favourite colours, which has made my love for bondage hard!

That was until I found this brand:

Scandal is stunning, it uses absolutely beautiful materials while still having that durability you need to get hard and rough. All products are made with the same beautiful red and black designer fabric on the outside, while the inside is this soft and plushie material. You can still feel sexy and luxurious while getting your BDSM fill however you like.

 

Now onto the best part, MY FAVOURITES! We’re going to go from least favourite to #1 favourite, but remember, even my least favourites are the best thing I’ve ever tried!

 

Scandal Bondage Bar

I’ll be honest, this one would be higher on my list because it is beautifully made… But the positions you need to be in for this one just DO NOT work with my body. It doesn’t make me feel sexy, unless the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man is your type, in which case I am the sexiest woman you’ll ever meet bent over in this bad boy. It puts you in the ultimate position as a sub, with all your most sensitive spots on display.

The bar has Velcro cuffs meaning they’re fully adjustable and will fit almost any set of wrists and ankles you put in them, and the bar itself is fully collapsible. This means it’s easy to hide and even easier to travel with!

Scandal BDSM Rope

This rope is beautifully made, using cotton and polyester, it has the most beautiful shine when used for photos but is made strong so you can use it to tie up your submissive or be tied by your dom and the rope won’t be stretching out under pressure. Now I don’t know many people with weird allergies like myself, but I’m allergic to nickel and surprisingly enough the more you look into it the more sex toys have this included in them! However, the caps on this rope have no traces of that in them, which makes my life MUCH better!

 

Scandal Breathable Ballgag to Cuffs

This… This is an absolute work of art, the only reason these aren’t higher is because I haven’t gotten to use them with someone yet and putting them on yourself and taking photos of it for Onlyfans is a nightmare, I imagine they’re much easier to use when put on by someone else. Anyway the stunning design on these matches with everything else in the collection and has the plush material on the inside too so no matter how much you struggle against them in your fits of pleasure they won’t hurt (I know this is a downer for some, but for others like me it’s a plus!). These are also Velcro so fully adjustable in all areas, the back strap is able to be tightened or loosened as necessary. Fun fact you can also remove the cuffs to be used on their own or will or items (possibly the Scandal Spreader Bar ?).

 

Scandal Paddle

A simple paddle, you can’t go wrong with this purchase honestly. With it’s stunning designer fabric and the fluffly soft material you get a solid thud, and a mark but still have comfort if you’re not trying to go too crazy or you’re just dipping your toe in for the night. I’m not sure how you could mess up the design of a paddle but Scandal has absolutely knocked it out of the park. I am in love!

 

 

Scandal Collar with Leash

Now this, ladies, gentleman, and my non-binary friends, this is my all time favourite. The struggles of being small and wanting my own collar and leash has been rough. Every time I’ve found something I’ve liked it’s been thick and bulky, or just too large for my neck, or pink. This collar is perfectly sized so it doesn’t take over my whole neck while still being a strong and sturdy collar. The leash it comes with is made of beautiful black chain and the handle for it matches the collar and the rest of the collection. It’s the dream collar I’ve always yearned for.

 

So with this I say, if you want a collection that matches, love black and red, love your bondage but want your gear to be beautiful and comfortable in all the right ways do yourself a favour and stock up on Scandal, it truly is a brilliant addition to any kit!

 

Pick these up at your local friendly Oh Zone Adult Stores.

5 Bondage Tricks You Could Try out Tonight

Most men and women, especially those who belong to younger generations, love to experiment and play with their bodies during sex. This is one of the main reasons why there are a lot of different fetishes out there and the most popular one is definitely bondage. That said, it’s really no surprise that so many people are interested in finding a hot bondage hookup. If you also love this type of sex, here are the 5 bondage tricks you could try out tonight with your kinky lover.

Temperature Play and Tickling

One of the first things you should know about bondage is that restraints are not used only for rough sex. You and your partner can use ropes, bondage, and handcuffs to enjoy something a little bit different. For example, you can experiment with temperature and caressing while keeping your spouse tied to a bed. These two activities can bring you or your partner to a very powerful orgasm, but only if you know what you’re doing, of course. So, if you want to make your boyfriend or girlfriend moan with pleasure, feel free to burn some candles and spill some hot wax on your lover’s skin. However, make sure to use specialized massage candles because, unlike regular candles, these ones burn at lower and more pleasant temperatures. If you find spilling hot wax extreme, you can always use some feathers or your own fingers to engage in tickle play with your lover.

Tie Your Partner’s Hands to a Bedpost

When it comes to bondage sex, this position is a true classic. It’s loved by both experienced BDSM enthusiasts and beginners. So, if you want to have exciting bondage intercourse with your lover tonight, you should definitely tie them up to a bedpost. This wonderful position allows you to do whatever you want with their upper body. They won’t be able to use their hands, which will make certain positions rather interesting. For example, if you’re a girl, you’ll be able to enjoy cowgirl and reverse cowgirl positions without him adjusting you with his hands. This time, you’ll be able to ride him the way you want. If you are a man, however, tying your girl to a bedpost will make the good old missionary position much better.

Tie Their Legs As Well

If you want to have complete control over your lover’s body, you should tie all four of their limbs to bed posts. This way, you’ll be in a position to do as you please with their entire body and they won’t be able to resist you. Once you do this, you’ll be able to play with all parts of their body and use some sex toys. You’ll be their master and they will be your sex slave. If you want to see what it’s like to be this submissive, you can always tell your partner to tie you up. If you want to enjoy bondage sex the right way, you should definitely try being both dominant and submissive.

Tie Their Ankles to Their Wrists

This is probably one of the most exciting ways to use bondage on your lover. If you decide to try out this BDSM trick, you’ll be able to enjoy two different sex positions. You can put your partner on their back and you’ll have a wonderful and rather satisfying angle of penetration. Also, you’ll be able to enjoy their facial expressions during sex. However, if you prefer taking your partner from behind, you can bend them over and tie their wrists to their ankles. This way, you’ll have the opportunity to enjoy looking at their beautiful legs and butt cheeks during intercourse. These positions are very exciting; however, they can also be quite awkward and painful for your partner. Therefore, make sure the communication you have with your lover is good and honest. This way, you’ll prevent any kind of injuries or unpleasant situations.

Bond Them to a Chair

In order for a couple to really enjoy a chair bondage position, the male partner should be the one who sits on the chair. So, when you tie your boyfriend’s arms and legs to a chair, you’ll be able to sit on his lap and ride him until he cums. You can also use your hands and mouth to play with his penis, he won’t be able to protest. If, however, you’re a guy who wants to tie his girl to a chair, you’ll have the opportunity to enjoy some rather interesting oral sex. Many couples love this position because it allows them to engage in exciting role-playing. So, if you’re into this type of sex, chair bondage is the perfect position for you and your lover.

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