The BIG Deal With Bodily Fluids?!

Cameron Diaz With Mens Ejaculation

Does anybody remember the Sex & the City episode where Samantha is sleeping with a man who has, as she so eloquently puts it, “the funkiest tasting spunk?” Or the scene in There’s Something About Mary where Ben Stiller’s character has his semen dangling from his ear when met to go on a date with Cameron Diaz – who then uses it as hair gel? I also recall a scene in Superbad where one of the characters is dancing with a girl who is menstruating and is completely disgusted when he gets her blood on his pants. There seems to be a bit of a fascination present in popular culture with bodily fluids, and it’s mostly portrayed in a comedic way that sees semen, blood or vaginal fluids as something to be repulsed by.

Without trying to sound too dramatic or serious, I feel that showing bodily fluids as something unnatural to be avoided doesn’t do much good for people when it comes to their sex lives. I feel this because, quite simply, there’s no avoiding some form of bodily fluids in one way or another when being sexual with someone. If having sex is accompanied with something that we have been taught to be grossed out by then whether we are conscious of it or not, there’s a part of us that is grossed out during sex. The same thing can be said for smell as this is something that many people go to extreme measures to attempt to cover up and conceal.

Many of us carry so much shame when it comes to the way we smell and taste. We are sold products that promise to eradicate all our smells and keep us “clean”. From deodorants and perfumes to scented feminine hygiene products & genital cleansers, we are constantly inundated with the message that something about our bodily functions is wrong and to be avoided.

Woman With Bodily Fluids And Sweat
Photo: Woman Who Is Sweating

Talking with lots of people over the years all from a range of different backgrounds, I have come to see that many people carry some very negative feelings when it comes to their own or another’s fluids and smells. Many women are disgusted to kiss their partner after he goes down on them, many men claim to avoid kissing their partner if she has taken his cum in her mouth, and almost no one enjoys performing cunnilingus on a menstruating woman. I understand that this aversion may be for legitimate reasons when risk is involved (i.e. sexual health reasons) however with our most intimate partners when safety is guaranteed, I believe that it can be healthy to overcome this aversion.

When it comes down to it, we humans are animals and have instinctual primal tendencies that dictate our sexual behaviours and attractions. Pheromones are chemical messengers that are emitted into the environment from the body where they can then activate specific physiological or behavioural responses in other individuals. Whether we are aware of it or not, these pheromones can be what innately attracts us to our partner so for this reason, I say enjoy the tastes & smells as it can be an incredibly sexy bonding experience.

Just like I would encourage people to become familiar with solo self-pleasuring to get to know their own body before being intimate with someone else, I suggest that people give their own bodily fluids a try. Tasting your cum does not make you “gay” gentlemen (as I have heard many times from many men) and you are not going to be harmed from kissing your partner after he performs cunnilingus on you ladies.

It is an interesting thing to notice how people are often ok for their partners to swallow their cum or lick their pussies yet are not ok with the taste themselves. I recommend looking deeper into these aversions and questioning whether it may be something you wish to overcome because nothing compares to having a partner who loves the way you taste & smell!

Funny Sex Meme
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I would not be a responsible sexual health educator, sexologist and sex blogger if I didn’t discuss safety & sexual health in the same article as discussing getting comfortable with bodily fluids so here goes. Sexual health screening is vital to ensure effective treatment and/or reduced rates of transmission of sexually transmitted infections (STI’s) & blood borne viruses (BBV’s). Certain contact with bodily fluids such as semen, vaginal secretions and blood can lead to transmission of some STI’s and BBV’s. Fluid bonding (i.e. sharing bodily fluids) in relationships between people who are known to be STI & BBV free means risks are significantly reduced however it is important to remember that exchanging bodily fluids with someone who’s sexual health status is not known carries risks. Exercise caution and use safe sex prevention such as dams and condoms when sexual health status is unknown. (See below for link to sexual health services).

It is so interesting to see how conditioned us humans have become believing that something about our natural state is dirty.  When safety and health are prioritised above all else, I say abandon the belief that our bodily fluids are something to be ashamed of and embrace the magnificence of all that our body does!

Author: Stephanie Curtis- BA Nursing

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#MeToo Fighting Sexual Harassment & Assault!

Hashtag for sexual assault and harrassment

In solidarity with the internet world I am joining the #metoo movement currently happening. Now if you haven’t been online over this past weekend, you might be wondering what the #metoo movement is or what I am talking about? A little over a week ago a major movement began in the Hollywood circle with sexual assault and harassment charges were brought forth by one of the industry’s most notable. These allegations are nothing new, countless incidents have been brought forth against countless people for years and years. What makes this instance so unique is the backing support it has received from women and men around the world who have had enough, in particular Alyssa Milano (Who’s the Boss, Charmed) started a tweet:

Twitter Facebook And Instagram Trending Hashtag
Image: Alyssa Milano’s #MeToo Tweet

 “If all the people who have been sexually harassed or assaulted wrote “Metoo.” as a status, we might give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem. #MeToo”

Hollywood Actress Alyssa Milano
Photo: Alyssa Milano

This tweet has sparked a viral online movement and one that is causing a number of debates amongst its own supporters. I first started seeing this post specifically calling for “Women” who’ve experienced these forms of harassment and assault to come together in solidarity, soon after I started seeing men, women and non-binary identifiers also posting their stories, or simply indicating a #metoo.  For many this is a movement to bring awareness to the harassment and mistreatment of WOMEN that has been swept under the rug for too long. Others are proclaiming this is the opportunity to show that sexual harassment, assault and rape are not just a Women’s issue, but rather everyone’s issue.  1 in 4 girls will be sexually mistreated in some way before they are 18, that same statistic applies to 1 in 6 boys. I’d say this is everyone’s issue and in 2017 when the movement for equality has made more stride than ever before, there’s no better cause to come together for.

Now that you have a little more information about the #metoo trend happening around you, I’d like to take this time to share my experience.

As a man, and for one who grew up in rural Canada surrounded by every hegemonic masculine stereotype you can imagine, I endured physical and mental harassment from peers in school for being different. I personally never gave much thought to sexual harassment and how it would, could and did eventually affect me.

When I was 19 or 20 I had been casually “seeing” a guy for some time, we went to movies, shared dinners etc. On this particular night which happened to be his birthday, he had people over to his condo for drink and celebrations, nothing unusual here. I turned up later than the rest of the guests as I had prior commitments. When I arrived everyone was well into the celebrations, him included. Everyone was full of love and laughter, the night was just like any small birthdays you’ve been to. As the guests levels of intoxication grew the party dwindled down, having arrived later I was leagues behind where this guy was on the drunk meter. As the last guests were leaving, I decided I would head home as well, but first to put this guy to bed. We had been seeing each other for a while and known each other longer; I thought the nice thing to do would be to make sure he was comfortable in bed.  After leading him from a half passed out position on his recliner to his bedroom, his energy level picked right up. The whispers of seduction were pouring from his lips, I playfully laughed it off and told him I was putting him to bed and I would see him the following day (I’m not one for drunk sex). He began kissing me and soon we were horizontal on the bed. I played it off with laughter and repeatedly telling him I was tucking him in and walking home… alone! The seductive moves began to get more forceful with one hand on my wrist and soon followed by the second. Even at this point, pinned to a bed, a man much larger than myself on top, I still didn’t feel like I was in a situation of assault. In my mind he was drunk. I began repeating for him to let me go, admittedly I was laughing and smiling through this. I continued to repeat myself, when his knees began pushing against my legs, still pinned at the wrists and the full weight of this man atop me I began to feel for lack of a better word claustrophobic. It was this feeling at the time that prompted me to use my head. Literally, when he leaned in to kiss my face or neck or wherever he was aiming I threw my forehead into his face. It was like lightning, his grip released my hands and I rolled off the bed in one movement.

I didn’t say a word, I don’t even remember leaving his apartment. I remember walking down the nearly deserted city street walking with as much “unf” as I could muster, it was about a 30 minute walk from his place to mine. To be honest I don’t remember getting home, or what I did with myself. I don’t remember being scared or upset at what had happened. As I said before, in my mind it was the alcohol. I chalked up what had taken place to the results of alcohol.

It wasn’t until the next morning that I found my t shirt with blood splatters across the front.

Perhaps putting the blame on something intangible, kept me and my brain from re living and mentally playing over the events to determine his actual motives.  I didn’t “date” this guy again, I just lost interest.  I never acknowledged within myself that I might have ill feelings towards him or in fact I didn’t think about it again for years.

The effects of that night did dawn on me years later, while dating another person who suffered from alcoholism (I’ve dated some winners). During this relationship after his countless benders he would always end up apologising for this and that, he would always blame it on the alcohol. After a few repeat offences and repeat apologies from this guy I knew it wasn’t the alcohol that lead to this behaviour. The alcohol just lowered the inhibitions that would tell someone “it’s not a good idea”. Alcohol doesn’t make you do things out of nowhere, it just lowers your sense of judgment and inhibitions.

After the later relationship ended I was out at an event in Vancouver and I bumped into “the guy”. All was well until he approached me outside the venue. He began the conversation as if his birthday night was the other day and not years prior. He was apologetic, he was afraid, he was ashamed. I didn’t know how to react, the emotions I was feeling in that moment were too overwhelming and came out of left field. I hadn’t acknowledged my own hurt and here he was exploding his. I did the only thing I knew how to do, and that was to accept his apology as cordially as I could and smiled then answered a fake phone call, told him I needed to take it and proceeded back inside the venue to my friends.

Now years later since all of this has happened and as i reflect on the situation as a whole i am left with more questions. What I should have said to him? Did he deserve that platform to express himself? Did his words bring up more trauma than healing?

No two situations are the same, no two people go through the same emotional process. That is what is so tricky with situations like these, not every matter is black and white. The one thing that is for sure is that your body is yours alone, no one has dominion over it but you.

I have shared my #metoo story along with many others. And I question what good will it do? I might be able to sit here and recount this story, countless others who’ve gone through their own situations may not and that doesn’t make their story any less important or imperative to this movement. No one is entitled to another’s story, nor is anyone obligated to share their story. These are personal offenses and take a personal journey to deal with.

For a personal story about recovering from sexual assault read Morgan’s article “Deciding to Touch”. Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centre’s are LGBTQI safe spots for people who may be in distress.

Author: Patrick Kriz- BA, Psych (HON)- Human Sexuality

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VIP Interview With Jaeleen Bennis Creator & Founder Of Bondassage

Jaeleen Bennis Founder Of Bondassage

Jaeleen Bennis is the creator of Bondassage which is an extraordinary professional service that involves the use of BDSM practices to provide a sensual massage. Jaeleen perfectly combined her skill sets of being a trained Dominatrix and a body worker into creating an unforgettable experience which allows couples or individuals to explore their desires and their sexuality in a safe environment.

Company Name For BDSM Massage Services
Image: Bondassage Banner

Participating in a Bondassage session allows you to take your time to explore new methods, techniques, different types of sensory play and erogenous zones. Each experience can be tailored to your personal needs so that you are able to build your sexual confidence which you can then use to enhance your sexual lifestyle with new levels of intimacy and passion. Bondassage has become so popular and asked for is in demand all around the world. She has created two different trainings: one-to-one trainings that can teach you the required skill set needed to become a certified practitioner, or two online courses designed for the curious beginner or non-pro.

BDSM Massage For Lovers
Image: Bondassage Kinky Erotic Massage Tips For Lovers

Tell me about yourself

Jaeleen Bennis, creator and founder of Bondassage®

As the creator of Bondassage®, Elysium by Bondassage®, Bondassage For Couples, The Art of Bondassage Online Course and The Advanced Art of Bondassage Video Course, I have designed programs that instruct individuals/couples and licenses practitioners/trainers in my uniquely sensual and provocative methods of bondage massage ~ also known as The Art of Bondassage.

I have over 28 years of professional experience, and 2000+ hours of extensive training in several healing modalities ~ Amma, Swedish, Acupressure, Shiatsu, Deep Tissue, Sports Massage, Reiki, Rebirthing, Polarity, Trigger and Active Release, Thai,Tantra and Taoist Massage, Shamanic Journeying, Aromatherapy, and Esoteric Energy Healing. I am a graduate of Barbara Carrelles’ Urban Tantra for Professionals program, a Sensual Shaman, and a Third Degree Reiki Master. As a Certified Massage Therapist, I have had the privilege of working on over twenty thousand bodies~ from overworked desk-bound professionals to professional athletes.

As a Domina, I am an accomplished Erotic Sadist with decades of experience in the “darker arts” of BDSM. I specialize in Corporal Punishment, Bondage, Sensory Deprivation and a wide variety of Body Play. I believe that BDSM is a valid path to self discovery and healing, and that submission can be a path to the Divine.

Outside of this realm, I’m a classically trained singer, voracious bibliophile, passionate fiber artist, a Virgo with Taurus rising, and an INFJ.  Humor, compassion, intuition, and integrity is integral to my work. I offer education, instruction, coaching, and professional training to individuals, groups, erotic bodyworkers, and sexuality professionals.

What inspires you?

Life in all its endless variety and glory. Nature. Teaching Bondassage to others (it’s a great way for me to learn new skills/approaches). I find inspiration for pervertible sensation play items at the drugstore, the hardware store, the cooking store, in my kitchen drawers, in my bathroom, in nature. Many times, less is more. How many different ways can I use this hairbrush?

What is Bondassage?

Bondassage is a combination of light bondage, sensory deprivation, full body sensual massage and sensation play. It begins with the receiver naked and kneeling, a leather collar around their neck and padded cuffs on their wrists and ankles. Their eyes are covered with a soft blindfold. Lightly secured to a comfortably padded massage table, they sink deeply into their body as a selection of sensually-stimulating sounds play through their headphones. As they surrender to the sensations and forget the outside world, they are taken to a place of exquisite enjoyment ~ a place where they can indulge their senses and embrace the pleasure. Bondage massage, tie & tease … these modalities have been around for centuries. Certified Bondassage Practitioners are trained in the copyrighted sequence, and professional sessions will vary subsequent sessions based on your likes/dislikes.

I’ve created the The Art of Bondassage Online Course and the The Advanced Art of Bondassage Video Course for non-professionals as a way to increase their knowledge, skills, and confidently offer Bondassage to their partners.

Quote By Jaeleen Bennis
Image: Jaeleen Bennis Thoughts On Bondassage

What BDSM gear is involved in a Bondassage session? How do you use the BDSM gear?

A comfortable blindfold (we use a Mindfold), leather cuffs, leather collar, ropes restrain the receiver and create a container of submission. A rabbit and leather floggers are used for both body percussion and sensation play. For body percussion, we use hands, paddles, canes and crops in a light sensual manner to heighten sensation.  Some of the sensation play items include vibrating toys (electric toothbrushes are a favorite), prickly items (wartenberg wheels), scratchy (fingernails), cold (ball chain flogger, ice), soft/silky things (fur, satin, feathers).  In the Art of Bondassage online course, I give dozens of suggestions for sensation play items that you can find around the house. In the Advanced Art of Bondassage video course, I demonstrate all the ways you might use these tools, toys, and techniques.

A Selection Of Bondage Gear
Photo: BDSM Gear
Sex Toys Used For Bondassaged
Buy Now | BDSM Store With Bondage Kits

What are the therapeutic benefits of a Bondassage?

Deep relaxation, surrender, healing, catharsis, pleasure, transcendent states, connection, discovering new pleasure zones. Intense orgasms have been reported 🙂

Would you recommend Bondassage as an introduction into the world of BDSM?

Bondassage allows people a “soft” entry into the world of BDSM. Learning and/or experiencing Bondassage is a safe, playful, creative way to stretch your intimate boundaries and expand your erotic repertoire.

Bondassage gives you the confidence and freedom to explore new techniques, new erogenous zones, and delicious new areas of sensory pleasure. Bondassage takes the receiver on a journey of sensation surprises. You may be a seasoned traveler in the BDSM realm but want something different, or you may be brand new and want to be introduced gently to percussion play, sensation exploration, and bondage. Either way, we can create a Bondassage session that best suits your needs. We’ll take you toward your known (and sometimes unknown) desires in an environment that is kind, safe, and full of surprises.

As a couple exploring Bondassage, you’ll find that it’s a lovely way to rekindle the passion and desire in your relationship. You’ll become more sensitive and adventurous with each other as you reach new levels of intimacy and sensuality. Bondassage gives you the confidence and freedom to explore new techniques, new erogenous zones, and delicious new areas of sensory pleasure. Bondassage takes the receiver on a journey of sensation surprises. You may be a seasoned traveler in the BDSM realm but want something different, or you may be brand new and want to be introduced gently to percussion play, sensation exploration, and bondage. Either way, we can create a Bondassage session that best suits your needs. We’ll take you toward your known (and sometimes unknown) desires in an environment that is kind, safe, and full of surprises.

What types of people would you recommend a Bondassage to?

Everyone!  Couples and adventurous singles find that Bondassage increases connection, desire, intimacy, and sexual satisfaction with your lover. Folks looking to dip their toes into the kinky waters, experienced BDSM players looking to incorporate more sensual & erotic aspects into their play. Professional looking to expand their repertoire and reach new clients. People who have a difficult time “getting out of their head”. Control freaks 🙂

Bondassage will help you explore techniques you’ve always wanted to try and introduce you to some you may have never even imagined. You’ll explore what kinds of experiences you and your partner might enjoy.

What would it feel like to receive a Bondassage?

Most people experience deep surrender, dropping deeply into their body. They have the ability to let go and give up control of the experience over to another.  Here are a couple of testimonials:

When receiving (being the bottom for) a Bondassage session, your mindset must be one of submission.  When you emerge from the shower, clean and dry, the practitioner immediately takes control.  You kneel at the massage table and the practitioner begins the process of bondage.  A collar is placed on your neck. This is the point at which you begin to understand that you will be under her control. Leather bindings on your wrists and ankles accentuate the feeling of submission.  She might caress your bum and even maybe a fleeting touch to your naughty bits, signalling that there is pleasure in your immediate future.

Laying face down, with a blindfold in place, you think, “I better scratch my nose one last time as I will be unable to do so for a while.” When the headphones go on, the feeling of being immersed in an alternate space is enhanced. Is the space safe? Well of course, but maybe there is a doubt … which is thrilling.

Soon you begin to feel sensations from a variety of angles and with different textures. Soft, scratchy, vibrations, silky, warm, cold … Where will the next touch be? Your arm? shoulder? Feet? Bum? Fingers? Oh I hope it’s …

Suddenly, the sensations get a little rougher. Was that a smack on my ass or could a paddle be next? Just as suddenly, you are receiving the most pleasurable stroke ever and then even more.  But the pleasure stops and again, there is intensity, but not severe, it feels good to be spanked and caned.  Just as you are beginning to feel that the cane is starting to hurt, once again her hand is between your thighs stroking you.  All the while the music is taking you on a journey through a very nice place, soft, and rhythmic.

Way before you want, the session is gently interrupted as you are ordered to turn over.  What will it be like? You are tied down again, face up and blindfolded and you as exposed to whatever comes next. Helpless and eager for pleasure. More pleasure please 🙂

And pleasure there is and how long will you last?  She is an expert at keeping you on the edge. So close and will I climax? Yes you will but not yet.

Finally the pleasure becomes the single focus of your existence. There is nothing but the stroke and another and another. Please, don’t come, don’t come, but you will and you did and it lasted forever.

After a while you notice that there is a warm cloth being wrapped around your genitals and it feels warm and safe.  Wrapped in a soft blanket, you drift off into another world of altered consciousness and time stops.

“Ok, let’s do that again.” ~ Mike S

“If the best massage of your life, punctuated with delicious sensory play while blindfolded and strapped down to a cushy massage table sounds appealing, you must try Bondassage … It’s a feast of delicious sensations, from deep relaxation to highly skilled touch … the combination of virtuoso massage skills, body percussion, submission, sensation play, and sensory deprivation will take you to places you’ve never been before. It’s like nothing I’d ever experienced … Words simply cannot describe it. As powerful as any dream fantasy I’ve ever had.” ~ S

“Bondassage is a glorious combination of sensory manipulation, sensual massage and BDSM that is the most erotic single experience I’ve ever had. What I experienced was truly a transcendent experience for me, and my life has been profoundly changed.” ~ K

What is involved in becoming a Bondassage professional?

We offer one-to-one professional certification in Canada, the US, Australia, and the UK. Our two day Bondassage training is designed for sensually adventurous individuals and couples, bodyworkers who work with sex and sexuality, tantrikas, sexological bodyworkers, sensual massage artists, sexual healers, sacred intimates, Pro Dommes, sexuality educators and professionals of all kinds. You’ll gain the skills and the tools you need to create the outrageously unique Bondassage Experience for those you touch. We provide comprehensive training tailored to your unique skill sets and talents.  You can find out more information here: Professional Bondassage Training And Certification.

Online professional certification is in the works and will be available globally in 2018: Online Bondassage Practitioner Certification.

Do you have to have a dominant personality to give a Bondassage?

Absolutely not. Someone with a submissive personality can give a Bondassage session to their Dominant as a way of service.  As Mistress Jenna Rotten says:

“Learning the art of Bondassage has opened a whole new part of My sensual side, teaching Me the importance of the connections we can make without using words.”

Where can people go to find more information?

For more information, you can find more information about my Bondassage courses here:

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My Singapore Princess!

The music is still playing, as Michelle Lee has invited a couple of bands to play live tonight. So, the people are really enjoying her party. The huge lawn and the big hall in her mansion in Sentosa Cove, which is located in the eastern part of Sentosa Island in Singapore, are filled with guests. Some have just arrived and they greet her when she happens to be by the door or whenever they see her.

At the age of twenty-seven, she is the most powerful businesswoman in the entire world, being a daughter of a billionaire. She has huge empire businesses that sell textiles and beauty products – the Wajahnya brand – to women all over the world.

Sentosa Island In Singapore
Photo: Sentosa Cove Singapore

She goes up to the balcony to get some fresh air, the Singaporean weather was humid with a refreshing breeze that night, an hour or so later. One hand holds a glass of champagne. She sighs. She’s alone up here. Being independent is sometimes lonely, she realizes. This is just another night of her weekend cocktail parties. It still seems uneventful. Even though she has all the attention from her guests whenever she is in the room with them, she feels that deep down inside of her, there is emptiness and there’s really something big missing in her life.

She downs all her drink and she starts to come down the stairs to get herself another drink. Only the ground floor is freely used by all her guests. From the second floor and up, they are off limits. Her security details see to it that no one makes any mistake of stumbling or getting lost at her mansion whether or not it’s intentional.

In the middle of the wide stairs, I stop. My hand is on the beautiful and well-sculpted wooden handrail. Someone that I don’t expect to see has just arrived.

Damien Summers.

She slightly gasps. However, she appears confident and cool as ever, especially when he looks up to watch her.

God! She has only met him a couple times before – once when they both jogged around the block, they passed by each other. She thinks that was a year ago. That’s when she has seen him at close proximity even though they’re sort of neighbors in Sentosa Cove, Singapore. At the time, she has noticed his tattoos. She has had one of her employees search for the meaning of those. She happens to have a photographic memory.

A couple of them are Tibetan tattoos on his arm. One is in beautiful Tibetan calligraphy. The strokes are very unique and graceful. It means “truth” and “freedom.” But she doesn’t buy it for a minute. She just instantly knows his type and she is very certain that he has some very dirty secrets that she must find out.

The second time that they’ve made eye contact is when they bumped into each other at a gallery exhibit. She has supposed it’s been half a year ago.

Damien is a foreign billionaire from down the road, not too far from where she lives. He’s in his thirty-two years. Like her, he’s a very powerful man. He is always busy to ever come to her cocktail parties. But she’s not sure why he suddenly comes to her party this particular night. Just like this. But, of course, she doesn’t mind at all. He’s a yummy hunk she wants to wrap her arms around.

His eyes are still fixed on her. She just knows those probing eyes. Even at this distance, they are still quite intense. They are truly of the deep ocean’s color.

Those eyes are still on her when she continues to go down the stairs, biding her time and looking at his face. She keeps herself from smirking.

Tonight, he’s wearing a men’s blue waistcoat, white dress shirt, charcoal dress pants and tie paired with dark brown leather brogues. His attire alone sets him apart from the crowd. Not to mention, it seems to match her cocktail dress tonight like they’ve agreed about their outfit or something. It is an unforgettable illusion halter cocktail dress of light blue in color. The top is merely made of lace, which has a decent cover over her breasts. It is backless and the length runs down half of her thigh. Her past-shoulder length, shiny black hair is swept to one side that is styled with elegant curls. Her makeup is smoky and seductive so men would stare at her for a long time, like they are stunned by even her mere presence.

“Good evening, Miss Lee,” he greets her formally. However, his eyes are less formal. They openly admire her every curve and every exposed creamy skin.

Cocktail Party In Singapore
Photo: People At A Cocktail Party

She smiles at him a little. “Mr. Summers, nice of you to join my party,” she softly drawls. She also gives him an equal look of admiration with her sherry brown eyes. His nose is prominent as ever, his eyebrows are well-defined, his chin and jaw are strong and his lips are quite kissable. Also, his short beard – like Jackson’s of the TV vampire series titled “The Originals” – looks amazing on him.

“Just call me Damien. We’re neighbors after all.”

“Right. So you can call me Michelle in return,” she slightly nods. Their eyes lock. She doesn’t mind people staring at them or even starting to wag their tongues about them. “Let me show you the buffet table.”

He gives her a slow grin. “No need. I just want some drink.”

She signals a young waiter who immediately comes at her beck.

“I have here champagne, bourbon, vodka and Bloody Mary, sir,” the waiter informs her guest.

He takes the vodka and thanks the waiter.

“So, what makes you come to check out my party?” she asks him, walking him toward the back of the house, at the garden where there are some scattered guests grouped by twos. Yes, the lovers’ rendezvous point is her huge garden with a couple of gazebos where they can have sex if they want to. They think it’s discreet enough, though because of the dim lights that create a somewhat romantic – or perhaps horny – atmosphere.

“You sent me a couple of invitations in the past, which I was unable to attend. So, I’m making it up tonight,” he simply says. He gives her that sexy smirk of his once again.

She has stopped sending him invitations last year when he hasn’t attended any of her parties. It is to save herself from humiliation and offence, she supposes. He’s the only person who seems to be uninterested of her weekly cocktail parties. Thus, his being here tonight is quite intriguing in itself.

“Okay. It sounds… a good reason enough for me. So, just enjoy the party. If you’ll excuse me, I’ll see to my other guests,” she tells him.

He just simply nods and follows me with his eyes. It has not gone unnoticed that he is checking out her sexy bottom.

‘Shit! The man makes my hormones go all over the place!’ she thinks just when she think his eyes are still fixed on her bottom when she turns her back on him. He makes her so aware that she’s merely wearing a scanty thong underneath her dress.

Wherever she is, he’s following her. She has noticed that he has already the third glass in just a matter of ten minutes of crashing to her party. Their eyes occasionally bump into each other as he moves into the crowd as well. He also occasionally talks to some women but his eyes would always find her, even though she’s talking to some business associates or friends.

‘What is he really doing at my party?’ she wonders. Then, just when he’s not looking as he gives his attention to the band for a minute, a plot forms in her naughty mind. She’s going to seduce this billionaire hunk. Tonight. If possible. ’Oh, it should be,’ her mind says.

She pauses, contemplating what to do next. She suddenly feels that she’s completely thrown off by how much she feels right now like she needs him. ‘Shit!’ she curses silently. She can’t seem to believe this immediate realization. Just when she’s about to go to him, she doesn’t see him where he is anymore. Her eyes stealthily look for him, smiling at her guests though as she walks toward where she last saw Damien.

‘Don’t tell me he has already found someone to hook up with tonight!’ she thinks. She suddenly feels a little bit distraught at this idea. It is not a far-fetched thought because the man can just stand there and a woman comes right over to him and gives him a blowjob with a demand merely done by his eyes. He has that effect on women, judging by the looks that she has witnessed earlier.

‘Damn it! I can’t find him anywhere in this crowd,’ her mind says. She slowly goes back to the inside of the mansion on the left wing, still looking for him but in a discreet way. She grabs another drink, and yup, bottom’s up. She shoves the empty glass to a bodyguard’s hand nearby. He then calls the closest waiter to get it.

She marches inside the house and she almost skids to a halt. Damien is talking to one of her security details.

‘What is he doing right now?’ she muses for a moment. But she pretends to not see him. She proceeds down the hallway that is miraculously empty. It seems that the guests who have been here earlier have already gone out to the lawn when the second band plays on the temporary stage set up for tonight. It is apparent that the second band she has hired for tonight is more popular than the first one.

She stops and leans one shoulder on the wall, trying to think what step she’s going to take next. Damien has just unexpectedly showed himself up to her party, and here she is, lusting for him in just less than fifteen minutes.

She’s about to curse herself when she feels a warm breath fanning her nape. Although all her senses are so aware right now, because of his perfume that he’s wearing, she knows that it’s him right behind her. Then, she feels his warm lips kissing her bare shoulder.

She slowly turns around to look at him. She holds her breath for a moment and looks at him in the eye.

“Damien…” she whispers his name.

His sudden move sooner than what she’s expected seems to be an answer to her raging need. He traps her between his rock-hard body and the wall where her bare back is leaning. He grinds his hips against hers, letting her know of his arousal.

‘Oh, shit! My honey pot throbs and gets damper by the second,’ she realizes.

His lips claim hers with open urgency. His kiss is so hot and wild and wet.

“Let’s go to your room. Right now,” he demands in between kisses.

“Okay,” she agrees without thinking. Well, her body is at least thinking at the moment. So, there’s that.

She holds his hand and drags him upstairs, passing by one of her bodyguards who steps aside to let them through the stairs. She lets him in to her master bedroom, which is lit only by a lampshade. Just as the lock clicks, he immediately carries her. Her thighs are wide apart with her legs wrapped around his hips and her arms are clinging to his neck. His mouth ravages her.

Damien puts her down the soft bed, taking off his clothing one by one while his eyes are fixed on her beautiful face. His blue-green eyes are darker than they are, which is the evidence of his blazing desire.

As he takes off his clothes, she kicks off her high-heeled shoes to the floor and sheds her fancy dress. She doesn’t wear bra so her breasts are immediately free from the clothing, which makes him gasp and his eyes go fiery. She also takes off her thong after that.

Her brown nipples are already taut before he touches them. She looks at his complete nakedness, seeing his wonderfully well-toned body and well-tanned skin, not to mention his strong erection.

Woman Without Shirt On
Photo: Woman On Bed

He kneels down in the middle of the bed and beckons her to come closer to him.

‘Shit! I’m his submissive, he is my dominant with complete control over me’ she realizes. This means that she’s going to be forced to release her tension right here in her room where a lot of men have already disappointed her before.

“Please me, Michelle,” he commands.

She doesn’t have to be told twice. With only one look of his eyes, she follows his order. She kneels down facing him and leans lower so that her face is directly in front of his dick. Her two hands stroke it and her tongue sticks out to taste him for the first time.

‘Shit! He smells wonderful and tastes good,’ she thinks as moans. She licks the head of his dick while stroking the length of it. He’s really huge that her fingers have a gap when speaking of its circumference. She opens her mouth as wide as she can to accommodate his thickness.

She thinks it’s like her lips are going to be torn. Still, she sucks his dick as much as she can and as deep as she can. She feels his slow rhythm as he thrusts at first while his hands are on her shoulders.

She looks up to look at his face. Their eyes meet as he also looks down on her. He makes her suck his velvety balls, too. She can’t really say she’s complaining to his orders. She loves doing what he wants her to do, without hesitation or whatever. And she doesn’t think it’s merely his being a persuasive person or she’s just being cowed to what he wants. She enjoys giving him a blowjob with flavoured lubricant.

She continues to suck him in and out of her mouth. He reaches down to her back, her bottom and finally her honey pot. His fingers play there as she licks the length of his dick.

The man can truly play, as well. He slips and runs a couple of fingers in between her honey pot, toward her clit. This makes her moan. He continues to do so and inserts two fingers inside her.

She curses in delight.

She also keeps on licking and sucking his dick and balls. He groans as well, which hints that he loves what she’s doing to him. That’s good news. It encourages her more to suck him deeper and down her throat. He stops inserting his fingers and he makes her taste her juice by making her lick his fingers. She can’t believe she actually tastes good!  Then, he smiles at her like he reads her mind. He licks the fingers she’s just licked. Then he holds her chin to kiss her on the mouth.

He shifts to lie down the bed. Her face is still right in front of his dick. But now, her honey pot is in front of his face as well. He pulls her legs to get closer to her very wet honey pot. Her knees are on either side of his head; her elbows are leaning on the bed. Then, she continues to flick her tongue on the head of his dick, while the other hand massages his precious balls. She runs her lips up and down the sides of his dick before she runs her tongue on its underside.

She kisses his balls and sucks them, while her hands are busy stroking his dick. Meanwhile, his tongue runs on each of her labia, horizontally and vertically. She groans with pleasure. Her hips wiggle slowly like in a slow dance. She feels so breathtakingly wonderful. Right now, she acknowledges that her truest desires are to be pleased like this by a man that no one has ever done to her yet. Those boyish men are nothing compared to Damien. All they’ve ever done to her is sticking their dicks into her honey pot and the deed is done.

This is it. There’s more to it than what she’s already experienced. Just as she has always known deep inside, she needs someone like Damien. Yup, like him. It’s damnably good that he’s right here with her right now, pleasing her as she pleases him.  He’s French kissing her honey pot that blows her mind. Her knees are trembling with desire and the need to be fulfilled. To release her sweet honey. He keeps on licking, nibbling and kissing her honey pot while she continues to suck and lick his dick at the same time. Next, she feels his two fingers enter her as he rubs and licks her clit.

She curses, pausing at what she’s doing to his dick.

“Pour your honey on me, My Singapore Princess,” he orders softly.

Her eyes roll up to the ceiling with pleasure. “Oh, damn it!” she whimpers. Then, she calls out his name over and over again.

“Yes, Michelle. Don’t deny yourself of what you truly desire,” he coaxes her, his fingers are still in and out of her honey pot.

She screams.

“Suck my dick, Michelle,” he cajoles.

She does as he says even though it takes a lot of effort for her. She keeps her honey flowing with a moan as she sucks his dick again. He pushes his hips upward in a fast tempo. Her hands are holding his dick, too, guiding it so that it won’t miss her mouth.

He grunts as he sprays his juice into her mouth.

“Yes, Michelle. Don’t stop sucking until it’s dry.” He groans.

Then he pays attention to her dripping honey pot once again, licking it. Her body convulses and so does his. In the aftermath, their sexes are very sensitive.

“Sit up,” he tells her a few minutes after.

With her back on him, she straddles him. He reaches out for her hips and he lifts them up a bit before he lowers them, guiding them as his cock is slowly sinking into her.

She curses as his dick feels so damn good inside her.

She begins to ride him as she moans at the same time. She doesn’t care if it’s loud. Her master bedroom is soundproof anyways. Aside from that, the party is still ongoing downstairs with the loud music.

He guides her moves as he meets them. She touches her breasts as he rocks her body non-stop. Her curses are non-stop as well.

Their breaths are labored but they don’t stop. He pauses for a moment just to bring her down against his body. She’s now lying on her back with him beneath her. Then, he continues to thrust in and out of her wet and tight honey pot. His one arm is around her waist and the other hand is kneading her small, perky breasts.

“Aahh… shit!” she cries. “Yes, Damien! Yes!”

“Oohh… my princess,” he whispers. His lips are pressed against the side of her neck.

His one hand that touches her breasts goes down to make circles on her clit. She can’t stop moaning and cursing Damien. He makes her feel so damn good! She’s never had multiple orgasms before. In fact, she seldom orgasms with those men she’s had in the past.

sexual ectasy
lady in ectasy

‘Shitty men!’ she thinks. They’ve never unlocked her desires as Damien has done and in just a matter of minutes.

She gives out a shrill of delight when she releases her honey once again, bathing Damien’s dick this time. She hears him groan. He withdraws his huge erection and he quickly puts it in her mouth where he spills his own juice. His eyes are foggy, while looking at her flushed face.

She drinks his juice and licks his dick dry. He groans with pleasure. He gently pounds the head of his dick on her tongue and lips, tracing them. She gives it a smack kiss afterward.

He caresses her face and gives her a deep, hot and wet kiss. He cuddles her after that kiss, which takes about a few minutes.

“You’re one damn good of a screamer, my princess. I like it,” he says, kissing her temple while his hands are rubbing down her breasts and nipples.

She giggles at his compliment and she turns her face to look at him. Her hand caresses his hairy and muscled thigh.

“I love your dick. Honestly. You’re the first man that I allow to sink into my honey pot without rubber.”

“Whoa!” he sniggers.

She chuckles.

“I love your honey pot, too,” he whispers, nibbling her earlobe as his hand caresses her down.

She giggles again and her body squirms with delight. In the process, she rubs his erection that rests against her bottom.

“I don’t think I can stay out and away from you even after this. I thought that I can resist you all this time, Michelle. After all, I’ve known that you’re such a playgirl princess.”

She looks at him shockingly because of this confession. “W-what do you mean? Is that your reason why you’ve never attended to my cocktail parties until tonight?”

“Yup. I thought you were just collecting men.”

“Well, there’s a bit truth to that. But I generally throw parties to give color to my very dull life. With all the money, without family or real friends, I am lonely, Damien. I must admit it.”

His embrace becomes tighter. “Oh! I thought I’m alone in that department,” he reveals, too.

She smiles at him, peering into his eyes. “No one has ever let me acknowledge of my truest desires until you, Damien. Because of that, you’re so special to me.”

He gives me a peck on the lips. “Ever since our first meeting, you’ve already captured my mind and heart, Michelle. But I just tried so hard to control myself. I didn’t want to be just one of your strings of men that you cast aside like a useless toy when you’re done playing with them.”

“But tonight, you couldn’t resist me any longer.”

“Yes. It’s a good pretext to come over.”

“So, you plan this to happen all along? Before coming over and crashing to my party?”

He grins impishly. “Yes. You got me.”

“Oh, my God!” she laughs softly, turning around to face him. “Really, Damien? Are you serious right now?”

“Yes! I confess, Michelle. I’ve been longing to make love to you ever since I met you.”

“No shit!” she interjects, kissing him on the mouth.

He groans, kissing her back. They break off slowly.

“I’m really serious, Michelle. So, no more playing with men. Okay? I forbid it. Totally forbid it. I want it to be only me you’re playing with from now on.”

“Oh! I’d love that very much!” she happily wraps her arms around his neck before she gives him a kiss. Ending a perfect night in Singapore.

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Master Slowing Things Down With Roaring Hot Tantra

Couple Kissing Intimately With Tantra

Recently whilst completing an intensive for my studies in sexology, I heard an elaborate sexual dysfunction called an Idiosyncratic Masturbatory Response which instantly grabbed my attention.

An idiosyncratic masturbatory response refers to an individual having a particular way of masturbating and reaching orgasm that cannot be replicated during intimate experiences with a partner. This has the potential to cause difficulties in a relationship or when being intimate with others as many people enjoy the experience of reaching orgasmic states with another person.

After doing a bit of research, I came across countless articles describing “the death grip” where men become so conditioned to receive hard and strong self-penile stimulation (usually whilst watching pornography) that they find it difficult to feel aroused when having penetrative or oral sex with a partner.

I know that it’s not just men that experience this need for strong stimulation. As a woman, I used to approach self-pleasuring in a way that did not honour my body. It was an experience that was often filled with shame & guilt that I just wanted it over with as quick as possible (I believe this has a lot to do with the fact that masturbation is seldom spoken of in mainstream sex education but that’s another article of itself!!) This hard and fast approach can result in difficulties reaching orgasm with a partner which can cause feelings of frustration and decreased desire for sex with your partner.

There is such a strong culture of seeking heightened orgasmic states in our society that the subtleties of being intimate with another human being go unnoticed. People become so fixated on the peak-the orgasm-the grand finale- that everything that happens beforehand is not fully experienced in its totality.

The beauty and pleasure from the softest touch, the sensations in our body when your lover looks at you, the fullness from feeling them in complete stillness inside us as we make love is all lost when we approach being intimate with them full of expectations of “achieving” orgasm. This is where Tantra comes in…

Many people are curious of what Tantra is and what Tantric sex looks like. Tantra is a complex philosophy however when I speak of Tantric sex, I mean a sexual experience where each moment and sensation is experienced in its totality with no expectations of getting anywhere or reaching anything. Tantra teaches us that a world of pleasure is accessible to us in the smallest of intimate experiences if we so choose to become attuned to the subtleties.

There are many ways to slow down and bring greater pleasure and presence into your sex life, with one’s own self-loving practice a perfect place to start. Bringing a level of conscious intention into your self-pleasuring and dedicating time to yourself with no intent other than to love yourself up can be a beautifully healing and pleasurable experience. Lighting some candles, having a relaxing hot bath and massaging your whole body with some gorgeous oils prior to any genital stimulation can really help eradicate that orgasm goal and teach you to slow down with your own body so that you can access more sensation and pleasure (A sexual health product available from Wildfire is All Over Pleasure Oil which is my personal favourite).

Wildfire Pleasure Oil Black Photo
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When men and women are used to hard and fast stimulation, having slow and gentle sex can bring up a lot of intense emotion. Frustration, anger, sadness, numbness and boredom can all arise when we begin to slow down and fully feel. It is not usual to be in touch with slight sensations and it can take some time for our bodies and minds to drop in and notice them. It is perfectly normal to feel the full spectrum of emotions when doing something that we are not used and often many of us have never tried slowing it down in the bedroom so be kind to yourself and your partner.

Naked Couple Having Public SexPhoto: Couple Having Tantric Sex

I highly encourage people to step away, if only on special occasions, from a hard and fast approach to sex, into an experience of love and connection with their partner. This could include eye gazing, breathing together, cuddling, kissing or extended foreplay-the key being that this will bring you into complete presence with your partner. Just remember, it is easy to get caught up in our minds when slowing it down so if this happens, practice mindfulness and come back to feeling sensation in your body.

Slowing down can take a personal and relational commitment, with open communication between partners extremely important to navigate any changes you both desire to make with your sex lives. It takes patience and being gentle with ourselves and our partner to make the transition from goal oriented sex to completely present intimacy however the magic that can be experienced when we do is completely worth it.

Author: Stephanie Curtis- BA NursingSave

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