Top 14 Worst Pick-Up Lines Ever Used

Guy looking down womans top

So you may ask, what are the worst pick-up lines ever used? You can definitely use them for a laugh, embarrassment and very rarely you can actually pick-up someone with these lines. If you do it right, you may be able to score a date, a kiss or even a one night stand.

Why Do Bad Pick-Up Lines Work Sometimes?

Did you know that using a pick-up line is actually a method of flirting? That is why you hear people use pick-up lines so often. They are a quick and simple way to get the message across that you are interested in another person. Here are some tips that you can use to give the pick-up line and yourself the best chance of working.

Be Hilarious

Well, it’s about hitting the right tone, with just the right amount of playful cheek you can do just that. One of the reasons why people use pick-up lines is because they have the capability to make the person you’re saying it to become happy. If you can make them happy which will help to improve their self-esteem and confidence, they may just be interested in what else you can offer them. Humour is also a sign of intelligence.

Be Authentic

If you are being your true self, you will have the best opportunity to feel comfortable in your own skin. Sometimes under the pressure of the situation, people blurt out things that are not true in order to fill in the silence. If you are prone to do this, you should plan different topics you can talk about beforehand, this way you will always have something to say.

Be Self-assured

It doesn’t hurt to have a little bit of the confident arrogance needed to pull them off as well. But you don’t have to be arrogant, you just need to be positive about what you are saying. If you able to communicate the message with a positive outlook, you may send feel good vibes out and the person will react accordingly.

Be Sincere

If you are looking to build a relationship from a pick-up line rather than a one night stand, you should choose Pick-Up lines that reflect the true message that you would like to get across. So if you would like to choose one that has some honest and meaningful qualities to it you will be better off. You can also do this by changing up the pick-up line to fit in with your personality.

Wait For The Response

If you are lucky, you will find that the person that you had attempted to pick-up will talk about the pick-up line for a conversation or to make another friendly joke. If this is the case, you can definitely continue the conversation and see where it goes from there.

Man picking up at a bar
Image: Picking Up

Top 14 Really Bad Pick-Up Lines

But please DO NOT try them yourself as it is likely that you may end up with a drink in your face and no-one to keep you company. Or better yet try them out and see how long you can last and whether you can luck it out. If you do use them, other people will sit back and relax as they watch you throw them out there into the world as they wait for the most unexpected reactions from the person that you are pitching them to.

  1. My love for you is like a fart. Everything about it is powered by my heart.
  2. Well, here I am. What are your other two wishes?
  3. How much will a 10 get me?
  4. Breathe if you’re horny. Alright! Score!
  5. You are almost as beautiful as my sister. But well, you know, that’s illegal.
  6. Do you like to dance? Good, then go dance so I can talk to your hot friend.
  7. I have a dictionary in my pants. Let’s say we go back to your house and put some words in your mouth.
  8. Wanna do a ’68? You go down on me and I’ll owe you one.
  9. You might as well just sleep with me, because I’m going to tell everyone you did.
  10. There are 216 bones in the human body… Would you like 217?
  11. Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
  12. Nice shoes, wanna fuck?
  13. Nice legs… What time do they open?
  14. It must be raining outside… Because the heavens must be crying as they are missing an angel.

So What Do You Think?

Maybe you can twist them into something amazing and worthwhile! Or you’ll remember them when you are drunk and say them to the wrong person. Were they the lamest?  Do you have any better or even worse ones?

I would love to hear from you what the worst pick-up lines you have heard. Post a message in the comments section to let us know. If you want to give people tips, you should let us know what are the best pick-up lines you have ever used? You know, the ones that actually are almost fail safe and will get that girl or gal to ride home with you. Sometimes it is charm that works but more often it is the gift of the gab and those funny one liners people use that send an endearing message. Whatever pick-up line you choose to use, make sure you have lubricant and condoms on hand just in case it works!

Richard runs the marketing and social profiles of adultsmart and adultsmart blog. He has been in the industry just over 10 years and enjoys his role both in an administrative capacity as well keeping abreast of issues relating to sexual health and lifestyles.

Tera Patrick The Hottest Asian Pornstar

Porn star Tera Patrick

Fleshlight Girl Tera Patrick has a men’s masturbator range which includes a Forbidden, Lotus, Swallow, Twisted and Tease. Today, I will be talking about Tera Patrick’s Lotus and Forbidden.

Fleshlight Girl Tera Patrick’s Lotus

Lotus has a classic design with one of the most popular textured masturbation sleeves in the world. The Lotus begins with a moulded copy of Tera Patrick’s vaginal lips. Once you enter them, there is a tight entrance that is smooth and straight without any texture. As you go deeper you will be surprised by different types of textures that are made to provide pleasurable stimulation. But if you already have a Fleshlight in this texture, why not try something different?

Porn stars fleshlight
Image: Fleshlight Girl Tera Patrick

Fleshlight Girl Tera Patrick’s Forbidden

Forbidden is made with a moulded copy of her perfectly made anus and booty. Once you push yourself inside there is a tight straight entrance that almost instantly becomes ribbed. Once you are ready to go deep the texture has a spiralling edge that creates waves of stimulation. The deep you are and the more you push, the tighter the canal gets. The spiralling edge will not overwhelm you, it will tenderly stroke you as if you were having lifelike sex.

With every stroke you make you will be able to feel the textured pattern. It will tickle and tease your frenulum and shaft. The minute I began to use this sleeve, I knew it would turn into one of my top men’s masturbation sex toy choices. My penis is 6.5″ long and I experienced no difficulty using the Fleshlight. The width of the Fleshlight measure 4.5″, so if you do have a wider dick you’ll appreciate the snug feeling that this Fleshlight provides. I feel that this Fleshlight could fit almost any penis size and the bigger you are the better it will feel. Just be careful, as the sleeve will make you cum hard!

Porn star Fleshlight of Tera Patrick
Buy Now | Men’s Masturbator Shop With Fleshlights

My climaxes with Forbidden were the biggest I’ve had with any Fleshlight that I have ever used. I couldn’t believe how extreme and intense my experience was when I orgasmed and ejaculated. Every wave my shaft came across was invigorating. You have to use plenty of lube with this Fleshlight (as is the case with most) in order to fully appreciate the experience and get the most realistic sensations. When it comes to lube, I feel a little more is always better even if it is a bit of a pain to clean up afterwards.

I give the Fleshlight Girl Tera Patrick’s Forbidden a 10/10. It can take your climaxes to a whole other level that you may not have experience before. This men’s sex toy is one of my top choices and I recommend it to everybody and anybody. Regardless of what size your penis is, you can appreciate Fleshlight Girl Tera Patrick’s Forbidden.

Who Is Tera Patrick?

Tera Patrick wallpaper
Image: Tera Patrick

Tera Patrick has a stunning mix of Thai, English and Dutch genes. At almost 6 foot tall, she has a fantastic body suited for high fashion modelling, Tera spent five years as a model with the world-acclaimed modelling group The Ford Modelling Agency which is known simply as Ford Models.

Tera was born in Montana, and grew up in San Francisco by her father after her mother left them to return to Thailand. Tera was discovered by a talent scout from Ford Models while walking around Fisherman’s Wharf in San Francisco when she was just 13 years of age. She worked with the agency for 5 years before returning to her studies at 18 and earned a degree in microbiology.

Despite the fact that she was discovered and worked as a model Tera’s curiosity and interest in nude modelling and porn continued to bamboozle her until it became something she had constantly thought about. She was soon showing up to photoshoots for popular men’s magazines and by 1999, she was prepared to jump into porn.

Tera Patrick’s claim to fame was through bondage and discipline adult movies which started her brilliant ascent to the top as a full time porn star. Her beautiful looks, stunning body and passionate sexuality made her a favorite with fans who were tired of the run of the mill exhausted porn stars.

When Tera married her now ex-husband Evan Seinfeld, she planned to leave the adult film industry, but in a risky and unexpected move she broke her contract with Digital Playground to start her own production company named Teravision Inc and she also signed a working contract with Vivid Video. All in all, Tera has had a very successful career and has built herself a booming company. She now has an estimated net worth of up to 15 million dollars.

Tera Patrick’s Adult Movie List

2017

  • Madhouse Mecca
  • Angel of Darkness: The Legend of Lilith

2015

  • Barbarella XXX: An Axel Braun Parody (Video)

2014

  • Live Nude Girls

2013

  • Grab and Bind of Tera Patrick: The Perils of Tera
  • Extreme Gagging

2012

  • This Ain’t the Expendables XXX
  • Girls of Sunset Place (TV Series) – Beauty and Burlesque

 2010

  • Rintihan kuntilanak perawan

2009

  • Reign of Tera 3
  • Porndogs: The Adventures of Sadie
  • Sex in Dangerous Places

2008

  • Teradise Island 2
  • Secret Lives of Women (TV Series) – Porn Stars, Exposed: Sexual Predators, Sideshow Gals and Fetishes & Fantasies
  • Porn Star Pool Party
  • Tera Goes Gonzo
  • Tera Patrick AKA Living Legend
  • Where the Boys Aren’t 19: Arabian Nights

2007

  • Spread TV (TV Series) – Episode #1.21
  • World’s Biggest Sex Show 4
  • Reign of Tera 2
  • Flawless
  • Where the Boys Aren’t 18

 2006

  • Tera Patrick on Fire
  • Aqua Teen Hunger Force (TV Series) – Grim Reaper Gutters
  • Teradise Island: Anal Fever
  • 2006 Fashion Underground
  • Test Drive

2005

  • Ecstasy Girls: Raw 2
  • Jack’s Playground 25
  • Collision Course
  • Reign of Tera
  • The Girls of Asian Love Palace
  • Centerfold Fetish
  • Desperate

2004

  • Big Tit Super Sluts
  • Island Fever 3
  • Soul Plane

2003

  • Island Fever 2
  • Jaw Breakers
  • Private Reality 14: Girls of Desire

2002

  • Penthouse Video: Virtual Harem
  • Foot Bottom Festival
  • Night Calls: 411 (TV Series) – Fetish Fever and First Times
  • Peds from the Past
  • Hogtied!
  • Helpless Heroines Volume 3: Girls Will Bind Girls
  • Helpless Heroines, Volume 2

2001

  • Forbidden Tales
  • Toe Talk
  • Break-In Bondage
  • Sole Indulgence
  • Struggle Pretty Captive (Video short)
  • Sexy Urban Legends (TV Series) – Blind Lust
  • Personals: College Girl Seeking… (TV Movie)
  • Real Female Masturbation 8
  • Please Cum Inside Me 2

2000

  • Angel Dust
  • Behind the Scenes 2
  • Behind the Scenes 3
  • Caribbean Undercover
  • Fast Lane to Vegas
  • Foot Lovers Only 2
  • Las Vegas Revue 2000
  • My Plaything: Tera Patrick
  • Nice Rack 4
  • Open Wide and Say Ahh! 6
  • Payback: Marciano’s Revenge
  • Tara Patrick AKA Filthy Whore
  • The Seduction of Maxine
  • Up and Cummers 80
  • Caught in the Act
  • Penthouse: Harlots of Hell
  • II Fire and Ice
  • Paradise Hotel
  • Ecstasy Girls 2
  • Shades of Sex

1999

  • 18 and Nasty 11
  • Aroused
  • Asian Street Hookers 6
  • Blind Date
  • Farmer’s Daughters Do Beverly Hills
  • Foot Lovers Only
  • Gallery of Sin
  • Loose Screw
  • Of Time and Passion
  • Pick-Up Lines 44
  • Pick-Up Lines 46
  • Please 5: Fireworks!
  • Real Golden Showers Video 1
  • Real Sex Magazine 22
  • Real Sex Magazine 23
  • Sex Island
  • Sex Offenders #8
  • Tera Patrick
  • The Tera Patrick Show (TV Series)
  • The Video Adventures of Peeping Tom 22
  • White Panty Chronicles 10
  • North Pole #11
  • Pick-Up Lines 45
  • Sex Court (TV Series) – Pleasurable Intent
  • Crossroads
  • Asian Street Hookers 7
  • Up and Cummers 73

1995

  • Talking Blue (TV Series)

Richard runs the marketing and social profiles of adultsmart and adultsmart blog. He has been in the industry just over 10 years and enjoys his role both in an administrative capacity as well keeping abreast of issues relating to sexual health and lifestyles.

This Is Going To Tor You A New Ring!

Tor Cock Ring

LELO is a sex toy company who design products that I consider to be perfect works of art. I have never been disappointed by their sex toy’s level of quality, style and power. So I thought it was time to use one of their sex toys with my lover during sex. So I enthusiastically ordered the LELO’s premium vibrating cock ring the TOR 2 which is intended to be worn around the base of an erect penis with the vibrator positioned upwards to stimulate the woman’s clitoris during intercourse. The LELO package comes with a TOR 2, charger, satin storage pouch, user manual and a 1 year guarantee.

Cock Rings are used to help maintain erections for those with erectile dysfunction and can also be used to help delay ejaculation. It keeps the blood flow within the penis so that men are able to maintain much harder erections that are stronger and longer lasting. LELO do come out with some pretty awesome products and the LELO TOR 2 vibrating couples ring is no exception.

LELO TOR 2 is made of smooth, FDA approved and phthalate free silicone. It also stretches… a lot! I was a bit stressed at my first glance of the LELO TOR 2. It appears as though it will be excessively tough, inflexible and not able to stretch around the penis by any means. However it is sufficiently stretchy to place on a penis. It will definitely be able to accommodate to fit men of all sizes.

It vibrates in 6 patterns and speeds that are whisper quiet. You’ll be sure to have some fun experimenting with each and every single one. Imprinted onto each side is the LELO branding. It also has a + and – button. To turn on and increase the vibrations press the + button. To sift through the patterns it’s as easy as holding down the + for 2 seconds. To turn down the vibrations press the – button. To turn of the power hold down the – button for a couple of seconds. From a design perspective the LELO TOR 2 is fantastic as it has easy to use controls.

Luxury couples sex toy for longer lasting erections
Buy Now | LELO Sex Toys

It is rechargeable and can be used for about one and a half hours of continuous play. LELO TOR 2 has travel lockable controls, so you can use it and take it almost anywhere.

TOR 2 fits comfortably in the middle of your lover and you and provides powerful vibrations to the clitoris and sends vibrations through the penis. It is also completely waterproof which means you can use it in the shower or bath. Additionally it can be easily cleaned with warm water and soap and anti-bacterial sex toy cleaner. With a 1 year guarantee and a 10 year warranty it is a premium sex toy to own that is designed to last. According to LELO this re-usable premium cock ring has the lifespan equivalent of 10,000 disposable rings.

One of the things that I love about LELO is that pretty much all their products have incredible designs that look amazing and my first impressions of the LELO TOR 2 was no different at all. I’m starting to sound like a broken record when I discuss the quality, packaging and general configuration of LELO sex toys. LELO definitely take the time to research what the market wants and what they’re doing to bring to you the latest products.

My Experience Using The LELO TOR 2

I did apply a small bit of water-based personal lubricant to guarantee that it would be easy to slide on and slide off. Usually when I first put on a cock ring I am in a semi-erect state. However I had found that when I use the LELO TOR 2 it is best to be in a completely erect state before putting it on. I placed it over my erection at first without the vibrations on and I could feel it get straight to work. The snugness of the cock ring guaranteed blood was kept in my penis making it harder and more erect which was something my partner enjoyed seeing.

We played around with the settings to locate the right one for us and began our love making session. The vibrations of the cock ring are effective and agreeable. You can feel it vibrate up along the shaft which provided pleasure for the both of us. The vibrating piece of the ring presses against her clitoris during sex delivering intense vibrations. The cock ring adds a whole lot of pleasure to your love making session that feels absolutely astonishing. The LELO TOR 2 is very comfortable to wear which I was thankful for, it fits beautifully and softly in-between two people.

LELO Tor 2 has a large rounded vibrator on top which might look tame and small but the vibrations are anything but. Its vibrations are extremely pleasurable and intense. Since the product is made out of silicone you can feel the vibrations strong enough without it being too overbearing like some of the harder plastics used on other cock rings.

You’d think the pleasurable stimulation would accelerate the time it would take you to ejaculate but due to the solid structure of the cock ring it counteracts the added stimulation. LELO TOR 2 is made to keep you harder for longer, postponing the time it takes you to reach ejaculation. It does all of this while adding pleasure and extra stimulation during sex for both people. The TOR 2 certainly delivers on its purpose.

The only negative point about this cock ring is the cost. It is a tad bit pricey for the individuals who won’t frequently use it. Despite the fact that it’s a bit pricey you get what you pay for, it’s a LELO product that will stand the test of time. Since it’s rechargeable you’ll never need to purchase any new batteries for it which means you end up saving money in the long run.

We are both truly delighted in the LELO TOR 2. We think the LELO TOR 2 truly is an extraordinary vibrating cock ring which ticks all the boxes. The LELO TOR 2 is good to add into your adult sex toy collection, to such an extent we’ve discussed incorporating it in our travel kit the next time we go away. Its compact size makes it easy to store away and it absolutely packs a punch!

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Richard runs the marketing and social profiles of adultsmart and adultsmart blog. He has been in the industry just over 10 years and enjoys his role both in an administrative capacity as well keeping abreast of issues relating to sexual health and lifestyles.

Are You Ready For A Mack Attack?

Adult movie star Christy Mack

If you don’t know who Christy Mack is then you’ve most likely been living under a rock with absolutely no internet. Christy Mack was born in South Chicago Heights, Illinois on May 9, 1991. She is an incredibly popular American adult movie star, nude tattoo model, and lap-top dance expert who has a cult like following that began in 2012. She is famously known for her incredibly animalistic sex drive. Christy Mack has been featured in various movies including Hot Body Ink, Whores INK, Inked Angels and Ink Girls. She has been featured in magazines like Rebel Ink and Inked Girls. She has also been featured in photographs on websites like Brazzers and Bang Bros.

Fleshlight Girl Christy Mack
Image: Christy Mack

Fleshlight Girl Christy Mack’s Masturbator Range

Fleshlight Girls released Christy Mack’s Attack and Booty a men’s masturbator in her sex toy range. So when I heard that she had a sex toy range, I needed to get her sleeves and try her out. Fleshlight Girl masturbation sleeves truly are top notch and the Christy Mack range is no exemption. The Fleshlight Girls Christy Mack has four different sleeves. Her vaginal sleeves include the “Attack” and “Lotus”. Her anal sleeves include the “Booty” and “Forbidden”. The molds are taken directly from Christy Mack herself and are to a great degree an exact copy, especially the vagina sleeves!

The Lady sleeve is perfectly made so that you can see each wrinkle and the folds of the lips. The lips are spread totally open and look inviting for penetration. The Butt sleeve is made with the gentle mounds of Christy Mack’s stunning ass which is used to outline the anal entrance. Likewise, the skin tone is significantly more authentic than the standard pink Fleshlight sleeves. Both sleeves are accompanied by the standard pearl Fleshlight Girls case which has a screw on cap.

Fleshlight Girl

Christy Mack’s Attack

Any individual who loves Christy Mack knows she’s well known for her Mack Attack and that is precisely what the texture in the Attack masturbation sleeve is intended to do. The sleeve contains a mixture of specks, knocks, ribs, and hubs scattered all through different chambers. The extraordinary texture provides surprising sensations where you never know what you are going to experience. As you go deeper you go the stimulation will change. At long last, for men who are sufficiently fortunate to be blessed by the gods in cock size, toward the end are little individual chambers like the lotus surface.

Christy Macks Lady
Image: Fleshlight Girl’s Christy Mack Lady

Christy Mack’s Booty

Christy Mack’s Booty is Fleshlight’s first signature and unique anal sleeve. Other Fleshlight Girl’s butt sleeves have used the typical Forbidden texture however if you are a long term users of the Fleshlight range, you can imagine that you would become tragically frustrated by the same texture. So I respect that Fleshlight have made a new texture, I welcome it with open arms and salute it with my morning wood. Inside you’ll discover tight waves and nobs that will encompass you entirely across the whole length of the sleeve.

I was particularly looking forward to using the Booty. Like other anal sleeves the opening is tight, however after the opening it does not resemble the feeling of lifelike anal sex. Once inside it’s a totally new experience, it is considerably more invigorating and energizing. The sleeve gets to feel inconceivably tight which essentially ensures a snappy climax. I for one jumped at the chance to keep it on the tight side, which helped me achieve a strong climax and left me feeling exceptionally fulfilled.

Men's masturbator of Christy Mack bum
Image: Fleshlight Girl’s Christy Mack Booty

Frankly, I myself have never had anal sex with a woman before. Even though this is the case, I feel that the Fleshlight Girl’s Christy Mack Booty has everything that I have ever wanted in an anal masturbation sleeve. Though, if you would like to experience lifelike anal sex you should try the Forbidden texture as it is exceptionally smooth and intended to feel like the real thing. If you are looking for added texture, you should definitely choose Christy Mack’s Booty. The Attack and the Booty are made with texture that are incredibly unique, they are one of a kind so it was difficult to pick which one was better. Be sure to check out Fleshlight’s men’s masturbators and strokers!

Christy Mack Was Nearly Beaten To Death By MMA Fighter

A MMA warrior went to trial on charges of attempting to murder his porn star ex 23 year old Christy Mack. War Machine whose real name is Jonathan Koppenhaver, apologized to his family and friends in a 3 page letter before he attempted suicide at the Clark County Jail in Las Vegas. He was confronted with 32 charges which date back to 2013. The charges included assault, kidnapping, coercion, battery by strangulation and more. From the assaults, Christy Mack had 18 broken bones which included a broken nose, missing teeth, a broken rib and a liver injury.

Christy Mack said “I didn’t look in the mirror for weeks. Just feeling my face, I knew it wasn’t right. So when I’d look in the mirror, it’s not me — that person wasn’t me. It’s so hard to go every day without being you anymore.”

Christy Macks Movies Include

2015

  • The Seduction of Young Girls
  • Twisted Taboo Tales 1
  • Delicious Tits
  • Phat Ass White Girls: P.A.W.G. 14
  • Horny Housewives 2

2014

  • Phat Ass White Girls: P.A.W.G. 12
  • Baby Got Boobs 15
  • True Lesbian Lovers
  • Tonight’s Girlfriend 31
  • Tits for Hire
  • Oil Overdose
  • Baby Got Boobs 14
  • Phat Ass White Girls: P.A.W.G. 7
  • My Sister’s Hot Friend 35

2013

  • Rambone XXX: A DreamZone Parody
  • Sergeant
  • Oil Overload 10
  • Big Anal Asses
  • I Have a Wife 25
  • Spread
  • Harvest Moon
  • Manuel Ferrara: Reverse Gangbang
  • Foot Worship (TV Series) – The PUSSYFOOT, HOLY!: A Beatnik Foot Fantasy
  • Skin Tight
  • Wanderlust
  • The Shortcut
  • Inked Angels
  • Slutty & Sluttier 19
  • Whore’s Ink
  • Jack Attack
  • Bra Busters 4
  • Hot Body Ink
  • Getting Schooled
  • Ink Girls
  • Planting Seeds 3
  • Girls Will Be Boys
  • Big Wet Tits 12
  • Down to Fuck 3
  • 2 Chicks Same Time 14
  • Pornstars Like It Big 16
  • Trashy

2012

  • Party of Three 3
  • Party of Three 4
  • Hall Pass Ass
  • Tanlines 2
  • Beamonstar
  • Young Girls Love Sex
  • Knockin’ Boots
  • Tattooed Anal Sluts
  • The Dark Knight XXX: A Porn Parody
  • Zatanna
  • Anal Lessons
  • Tits to Die For 2

Richard runs the marketing and social profiles of adultsmart and adultsmart blog. He has been in the industry just over 10 years and enjoys his role both in an administrative capacity as well keeping abreast of issues relating to sexual health and lifestyles.

Coming To Terms With Being Gay & Fat!

fat and sexy

I was about 15 years old when I finally admitted to myself that I was gay. It was a long time before I became comfortable with my sexuality and decided to pursue anything, and when I finally did, I realized that dating wasn’t really an easy thing to do. Not for me that is.

What It’s Like Being A Chubby Gay

You see, I have always been a bigger guy and it got worse after I left school. I realised that, while yes, the gay community waved the banner of pride and inclusivity, it wasn’t always something that they actually practiced. By the time I went into the dating scene it was a world of applications and I decided to get Grindr on my phone. I added all the criteria to my profile that it needed:

  • A photo of myself – done.
  • About me – done.
  • What I was looking for – done.
  • What I was into – done.

Then it came to my information section. I filled in my location and my height but I paused on my weight. I thought about it and I decided to leave that part out. I activated my profile and started to look through all the different profiles. I looked at all the cute guys and their interests. I decided to say howdy to a few of them.

“Hey, hey. How’s it going? 😊”

This was my usual greeting. I honestly was not sure how I should start a conversation. I’d never done this before.

I said hello to a few different guys, left it at that and went about my daily business. A few hours later I jumped back on and there were no responses. Okay, maybe they’re all just busy. I decided to explore the app and check out the features. I then came across the section where you could see which people that had viewed your profile and went into it. Every guy that I had messaged checked out my profile but they didn’t even bother to respond. It didn’t feel good, but I decided not to dwell on it and went about my own business. I jumped on a few times and got the same response, so I decided to not bother and deleted the app. I felt deflated and kept off it for ages after that.

I Found Alternative Gay Dating Applications

Then soon after, a few more other apps came out that were marketed towards a more diverse market and so I decided to give them a try. The two that I tried were ‘Scruff’ and ‘Growlr’. They claimed to be for the bear and alternative gay groups. These were a little better received and so I decided to keep these apps. At least a very few guys actually answered me when I messaged them.

I also came across two apps called ‘Grommr’ and ‘Bigger City’, they were marketed for the chubbier gay community. Perfect I thought. I created a profile and perused a few different profiles. There were actually smaller guys looking for chubby guys! This was perfect! Or so I thought. I chatted to a few guys and I even hit it off with a guy. Yay! We went on a few dates and got to know each other. Then, he confessed something to me.

He wanted to be with a guy and make him bigger.

My warning bells went off. I certainly didn’t enjoy being bigger and I always tried to lose weight. Was it something I was willing to do to be with someone? Was I willing to compromise myself and my values just to be with someone? I thought about what he had said and what I wanted, and then decided it wasn’t something I was willing to do, so I broke it off with him.

I then became curios about why he wanted something like that, and discovered the world of feeding and gaining.

“Feeder: Usually a male who likes to encourage weight gain in his partner through the consumption of food.”

That’s how Urban Dictionary describes it.

I read up how feeders would do things to make their partners bigger. Buy them extra food and tell them they deserved it. Say they were full and give their leftovers to their partner. This was not something I wanted to be part of, so I deleted my profiles and have never been back since. Since then I have met guys that have a preference for bigger guys, and that’s okay. Everyone has their different preferences, but I personally don’t want to be fetishized and have to question if the person I want to be with wants to be with me or just the fetish they are after.

What The Gay Dating App World Really Needs

There’s also Tinder! Which I know for most straight people it’s just a hook-up app. When two people hook up through Tinder it’s called a tinder-bang. But I feel for the gay community it’s more about going on actual dates and to meet people rather than it just being one of the many hook-up apps for gays. That’s how I feel it’s like. I have talked to genuine people on it, I even met a guy off it at the beginning of the year and we’ve actually become good friends. And no, not with benefits but we have become good friends.

gay dating
fat gay

I’ve also never been to a gay club before. I honestly don’t feel like I would fit in to that scene and feel like I would be eaten alive in that environment. I’m not small; I don’t have the right clothing or hairstyle. I just wouldn’t fit in at all.

But after going through so much self-discovery and not loving myself for a very long time, I have come to realise that you need to look after yourself first and foremost. As the great RuPaul would say:

“If you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you going to love anyone else? Can I get an amen?”

And those words are very true! I honestly do believe that you need to learn love yourself before you let anyone in.

Since coming to this realisation, I have decided to have a different outlook on life and have even given the apps another go. I have redone my profile after re-evaluating what I want and I feel like with a more genuine profile that has a positive view, I have gotten a better reception. I still find it hard to be part of the gay community even though there are definitely a lot of loving people in it. I feel that if I work on myself as a person, I can be included to be a part of this community and meet new people.

But hey, I must be doing something right, because just today I got asked out on a date, so that must mean progress right? I sure hope so! I am getting dressed up in designer clothing just for the occasion.

Author: Brett is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres

Richard runs the marketing and social profiles of adultsmart and adultsmart blog. He has been in the industry just over 10 years and enjoys his role both in an administrative capacity as well keeping abreast of issues relating to sexual health and lifestyles.