The 6 Types of Customers in an Adult Store

Working at Oh Zone adult stores for a few months now I feel like I’ve met every kind of customer possible, all the different reactions you could get to the kind of products we sell. So I thought why not compile a little list of the 6 different categories I’ve discovered so far, you can read along and check yourself, your friends, or your partner(s) off as you go, I know which I am!

 

Young Kids in for a Laugh

We get it, sex it funny when you’re young, when the craziest thing you’ve done is finger Jess in a park, sex toys seem out of this world hilarious. But honestly this is the easiest way to have your local adult store worker roll their eyes when they see you next time. A little giggle here and there is fine, but we need to be cautious and remember that other people do shop here and while you guys may think it’s this weird thing, another person may be into it and your laughs genuinely could be hurtful. Sex shops are fun but remember we’re in adult stores because we’re adults everybody.

Shy Couples

Honestly I love shy couples, you can try to chat and help as much as you like, but they get nervous or embarrassed and it’s quite sweet to watch. The things you’re looking at buying in these stores are very intimate and not everyone is comfortable enough to have that conversation with a stranger. I usually try to joke around in this case to break the ice but if that fails I leave them to it, either they’ll figure it out themselves or finally break and ask a few questions and either is fine by me. My favourite thing is the breakthrough moment, you won’t always get it but if you tread carefully but bond with them JUST enough they’ll open up and have these amazing conversations with you… And I just love that moment, it’s special.

The Open Partner With a Shy Partner

Probably the funniest combo I’ll ever see (THIS GOES FOR FRIENDS TOO). When one person is too shy to say a word, while going red as a tomato and the other just goes straight into it without a second thought. You can always tell the shy one would rather be anywhere else but here, but the outgoing one will tell you the ins and outs of what they like, what they don’t like, what they’re looking for, what they’ve already tried, all while the shy one stands there absolutely mortified! It’s almost as if they’ll go into far more detail than necessary just to really get under the shy one’s skin. It’s a fun dynamic and a really common to be honest. (Two out going partners/friends are HILARIOUS most of the time and very down for a joke, but there’s something about the comical amount of embarrassment that make this pairing one of my favourites.)

The Vanillas

My sweet cherubs, I really do love them, bless their cotton socks. It’s amazing to watch their eyes widen each turn they make into the store, each new product a total mystery to them. They’re sweet because they’ll usually ask the most questions out of everyone because most things in the store are a whole new world to them, no idea that there were so many kinds of sex toys with so many functions that go SO MANY PLACES.

This is where we usually take a lap and give a brief tour while getting to know the customers, “what do you like”, “what would you like to try”, “what did we come in here looking for” all the things that will help us crack down on the best options for the newbies.

The “Not Here To Mess Around”

These people come barrelling through the door, they have a list, they know names, styles, colours, everything you could think of. There’s no time to chat, no time for questions they came here for their particular thing/s and they need it now! These guys are the easiest people to deal with… Mostly because they’re in and then bam they’re gone, you’ve barely got time to put all their items through before they’re leaving again. They know what they’re after and I respect them for that/

The Regulars

My all time favourites, my regulars! These are the people I see once a week, once every two weeks, maybe more! I know the ins and outs of they’re sex lives, we keep updated on each others lives, they bring in their other friends, partners, aunts etc, we’re basically friends at this point… Friends that only catch up in the local sex shop haha.

Being regulars you can usually ask “how was the xyz” you bought last time, “how’s the fight going that you had with your boyfriend/girlfriend”, “how was the toy you got as a surprise for your anniversary?” and it’s fun getting the little updates and reviews, especially when they’re good because it’s just nice to know that you’re helping them to some degree!

 

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