The Virgin Traveler in Yilan County, Taiwan

Filipina of Women in Polkadot Shirt

Lex is 24 and has lived with her grandmother for most of her life – doted on she never got around to having sex.   Having lost a lot of weight, she now found that the opposite sex was interested in her but he did not really know what to do or where to take it.

Landing in Taipei she met up with Claire – a girl she had met in the Philippines but also had gone to college with at UCLA.   Claire was her best friend in the whole world and they had many adventures to reminisce over. Right now they were headed to the Shangri La in Yilan county.

It was not long before she noticed him.  Ruggedly handsome Jason was everything she imagined she wanted physically in a man.  An unexpected accident made her T-Shirt we and he was chivalrous in trying to assist her.   It was not long before they were in a room together and after setting aside her reservations she lost her virginity.

Read how this virgin lost her virginity in Yilan County

Sex Diary: The Ex’s Nickname System Part 3

Fireman Carrying Ladder Photo

…Continued from Part Two….. I’m almost ashamed to go on but alas there are more sex stories and they’re certainly of more interest to be told than left to float around in my head as memories.

Smokey

A broad-shouldered fireman who put up with my drunken antics before I finally shoved him down the hall to the bedroom. Smokey had an irritated cough and as a nursing undergraduate, I immediately identified that it didn’t sound good. “All good” he said as we got down to business. Afterwards as we slept the alcohol off, he coughed regularly and his voice became hoarser throughout the night. As the night went on, it sounded more and more serious.

All hail the morning wood and away we went at it again which was fine enough up until the condom broke. Well, crap! That means a trip to the chemist for emergency contraception and then off to the sexual health clinic. It happens. I dropped him at the train station on the way to the chemist, he promised to be in contact. Needless to say I didn’t expect to hear from him again.

Three days later he rang to ask if I had been okay after the emergency contraception. I noticed he wasn’t coughing so much anymore. It was then he told me that he’d actually had face mask crack whilst he was on duty as a fireman earlier that day and had inhaled enough smoke to cause serious irritation to his lungs. He’d collapsed at the train station and had to be rushed to the hospital. Smokey spent 24 hours in intensive care being helped to breathe. When one inhales enough smoke to require hospitalization and then disappear like a puff of smoke, it’s a certain inevitability you’ll be christened Smokey. Props to him for his performance given that he had serious issues breathing. A true hero fireman.

Linkenbrinkenfingertrickter

He was a lover of my girlfriend. His actual name was Leonard and he had an Austrian heritage with a mildly complicated sounding surname. Over drinks one night I asked if he would pay a visit any time soon. Kissy was confused as to who I referred to and in an attempt to sound his surname out, I hadn’t been able to remember his first name I managed to slur out loud “Linkenbrinkenfingertrickter”. I christened him with a name that gave fits of hysterical laughter, it was guaranteed to stick and it did.

 

Man Using Wii Photo
Photo: Man Using Wii – Sex Diary: The Ex’s Nickname System Part 3

 

Hook Boy

This delightful young gentleman graced my bedroom one night, nudged on by my girlfriend who said “Go on, let loose and enjoy yourself. Give a youngen a try”. You see, I’m not entirely fond to bed partners much younger than myself. Unlike my girlfriends who like to train and mould an enthusiastic younger lover, I’m not so keen after I had less than wonderful experiences previously. Hook Boy did not change my mindset.

He was exuberant and gets a thumbs up for that but it was steadily downhill from there. Hook Boy proved to be quite lacklustre when it came to foreplay and intercourse. He gave me an experience akin to me masturbating out of boredom where I’m just going through the motions. After I brought him to orgasm quickly with intercourse Hook Boy proclaimed “I’ll finish you off!”. “Okay, here goes nothing” I thought as he shoved two fingers inside me. I could not have imagined the horror that was about to go down as he proceeded to finger bang me. Suddenly I felt this claw that scrapped, yanked and pulled at my insides. “Ummm, excuse me, but what the hell do you think you’re doing there?!” I yelped as I tried to pull myself away. With a proud grin Hook Boy replied “Stimulating your G-Spot” as he attempted to continue. No… no… NO! That is no way to stimulate a G-Spot. It was now game over. I thanked him for his time and showed him the door.

Imagine for a moment what it feels like to have your internal organs pulled out of your body via your nether regions with a piece of barbed wire fashioned into a crude hook. You’re about close to what this sensation felt like. And that is how he became known as Hook Boy.

Wii Man

Around the time of the release of the Nintendo Wii when the console was still a novelty a new lover paid a visit to Kissy’s house. After the standard ‘break the ice’ beverage Kissy leaned over with a wink and whispered “So what would you like to get up to now?”. Wii Man pointed over at the Nintendo Wii and told her he’d like to play that for a while as it looked like fun. As Kissy sat there bewildered he asked “Do you have the ten pin bowling game?” Kissy set the console up and booted up the requested game. An hour of play later she lost her patience and told Wii Man in no uncertain terms that if he planned to continue to use his fingers on a remote instead of on her then it was time for him to leave. The penny finally dropped for Wii Man and they proceeded to get down to business. Kissy admitted the next morning that while he may have been good with the angle and power in the game, in real life it was all gutter balls.

 

About the author: Alicia is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres

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Why Read Erotic Fiction?

Erotic Fiction

Even though I tend to refuse instructions when I buy new IKEA furniture, I do like a good read and some of the short stories in the category of Erotic Fiction are my absolute favourite. Yes, I said it. I’m not ashamed I read Erotic Fiction. I don’t even bother to hide it from my family anymore. There is nothing missing or lacking in any of my relationships that forces me to read it. Why Read Erotic Fiction? To simply enjoy it for what it is.

I personally like Erotic Fiction that promise to deliver highly sexually intense situations and play along with relatable or believable sex plots which normally have a good outcome. Also something that is 20 pages or less is happily preferred to cater my attention span. I often lean more towards funny or realistic couple erotica. Stories in which characters just mattress dance the entire book don’t do it for me. I won’t lie and say that I don’t want any sexual descriptions. I love to read about the bed play, the shower scenes, the car scenes, the….well, you get the point. I like lots of description, and the more descriptive the better. But I also need humor and an emotional connection.

I will admit BDSM Erotic Fiction is not something that turns me on but this is not to say that I don’t feel they aren’t worth reading. The wonderful thing about Erotic Fiction is there is a story out there for everyone. You just have to find your interest. I think one of the best things about Erotic Fiction is that anything can happen. Unlike pornography with erotica they can make magic sex happen in the oddest of places or sexual positions or have one to many unrealistic orgasms. They can describe an orgasm in so much detail, each and every touch the lovers make, every time their bodies react and how they feel mentally that you can never grasp with any type of DVD.

Now the real question is, why read books when you can just watch a movie? It does seem that movies are heavily more popular and mainstream then books nowadays and it much easier to sit down for an hour or two watching a porno then it is to get invested in a book that might take you a few days to get through, but that doesn’t mean movies are better, just more convenient.

 

Erotic Fiction
Book Cover: Sex Literature

 

In books it”s much easier to see what is going through certain characters heads.  This actually makes the characters actions and motivations make more sense when they play out.  Instead of just having a person strip naked and deciding to ravage the postman for some reason, we can sometimes hear their thoughts and the character can explain and justify their logic. Plots also make more sense in book form because the point of the book is to tell a story, not to visually amaze. This is one of of the biggest reasons why books are easier to be emotionally invested in. It doesn’t feel like I’m just reading something to get off on but rather something I can just sit down an enjoy the plot for what it is regardless of being erotic or not.

Another advantage with Erotic Fiction is that when you have a black out or out camping etc you will still have something accessible……a book. All you need is a light source if it’s dark and you can read a book practically anywhere. The great thing about reading an erotic novel is that the characters are as beautiful as you want and most of the plots seem more believable, because in your head you picture how you would think it would happen in real life, which is much more immersive then being bombarded with awkward dialogue and countless actors with no acting skill at all.  As long as the writing is descriptive and well done then your head will do the rest of the work.

Don’t get me wrong I love watching porn but I like reading my short stories as well. My short stories are not just to turn me or give me new ideas, it’s just the enjoyment of good characters and story-lines mixed with how my head pictures it all makes it incomparable.

 

The Stupid Things People Do: Male Masturbation!

Embarrased Man

We never thought this story could be topped but it appears it has.  Read on and you will question

whether you believe it or not!

In June of 2014 a Chinese man by the name of Lian Tien remaining exceptionally embarrassed after his genitals became stuck in a pipe leaving him for an entire two days at a building site. Lian Tien told reporters and Police that his reason for getting into one of the world’s most uncomfortable situations and the world was astonished by his answer. –

“It was hot so I was painting the wall in the nude, and I slipped on the floor causing my private parts to fall inside the pipe that was protruding from the wall to take water outside from the air conditioning unit. Unfortunately, I got stuck as a result. I thought that no-one would believe me and I tried everything I could think of to get the damned thing off once it had got stuck. I cut it from the wall and tried pouring oil and liquid soap down the sides but my manhood was so tightly wedged that nothing dripped down. I went to sleep thinking that if I relaxed it would slide off. But it didn’t. It began to get red and inflamed. I was worried that I would get a terrible infection.”

The 61 year old Chinese man declared that his genitals were stuck in the pipe as it was sticking out. The pipe was previously used to pour water from the building’s ventilation. At the same time he thought no-one would be able to believe his story as it appeared to be to far fetched and he didn’t want to lose his job. He hid in the building for two days but his genitals were getting swollen from the friction of the pipe and his body started to get a fever, he knew this was not a situation he could maintain for a long time. Soon after he got the fever, he called an ambulance, who suggested they require the fire department’s help to get him out of this situation. Firefighters in Quanzhou City took four hours to cut him away from the piping around Mr Lian’s privates.

Doctor Dewei Yuan who treated Mr Tien said:

“The parts became swollen so severely that there was nothing more we could do, and we needed to call for help. “

Stuck Penis
Penis Stuck

So these Chinese must be frisky buggers as on 2 June of 2017 a man got his

penis ‘accidently’ stuck in a wrench!

The 37 year old bachelor from the the eastern Zhejiang Province was brought to the Taizhou Hospital after his parents had called the firebrigade as their son had his penis caught in a wrench.  The Linhai Fire Brigade attended armed with an angle grinder but determined that the operation would have to be performed more delicately bringing him to the hospital.  Apparently the penis had been stuck in the wrench for more than a day and had swelled – no reason was given as to why the man had put his penis in a wrench ring except that it was an accident.

Doctors at the hospital were unclear as how to remove the penis from the ring until a specialist who had studied a similar case at a seminar called in two local dentists.  The dentists armed with dental drills managed to move the ring after a 30 minute operation.

Surely the Chinese are aware that there are many safe masturbation techniques!

Penis Wrench
Jelqing gone wrong

We think this is most common and when people say that they accidentally just put something up their rear ends do we believe them?   Hospital departments gets their fare share of these sorts of incidents on a daily basis.

What Goes Up A Butt

At this time there are plenty of other incredible stories of what people have accidentally placed up their arse-holes, vaginas, penises, ears and noses. From frozen peas, to old Nokia vibrating mobiles placed inside condoms, cucumbers and much more. Sometimes thing’s that work for other people end up not working for others.  For most of us home products or food products are not made to sexually satisfy peoples cravings. Things like vegetables, children’s playthings, nail scissors, buzz light years, and glasses and a lot more have been inserted into peoples backsides.

I’m able to see the funny side about placing these unusual objects up a rear end but somehow just wonder what some of these people were thinking as they inserted a toy car up there.  Sure I understand phallic things like carrots or cucumbers with no harmful edges and as a substitute for the real thing but why place a set of spectacles or glass bottle.  As one surgeon put it –

 

“After more than 30 years in surgery, I am awed at what individuals will do to themselves. I have so far seen: a candle, lights, batteries, chop sticks, a cushion, hair curler, and even a container of Edge Shaving Cream (the 33% more in the can). I hope that he noticed that the shaving cream was the “33% more in the can” just so that there was 33% more to remove.”

 

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