The sun is shining, the birds are singing, little baby birds are calling out for worms, the ground and air are warming up, flowers are starting to bloo- oh… that’s right, it’s that time of year again – allergy season!!! That’s right, while many of us are welcoming Spring with open arms, others are bracing themselves as the beginning of a miserable few months of sneezing, scratching, stuffiness and impaired senses kicks off. Thanks Mother Nature! You can be such a downer sometimes… Scientists are not totally sure why humans have allergies in the first place but it may be a misplaced attempt by the body to protect itself from perceived harm. To the sufferer it feels exactly the opposite of helpful and in fact reactions to allergens can be deadly in some cases – though for most, they’re just a miserable pain in the butt (figuratively speaking, that is. Usually.)
Allergic reactions happen when the immune system encounters a substance which would not be harmful to most people, and basically overreacts, has what is called an allergic response, and can cause symptoms which are unpleasant and even harmful. Allergies are quite common, and on the rise. Around a third of people suffer from some kind of allergy and unfortunately we don’t have all the answers yet but there are a range of treatments and symptom management strategies that work for many sufferers.
- You know how hard it can be to eat when you have a blocked nose? Well the same holds true for eating your partner – oral sex can be a nightmare when you can’t breathe through your nose! Likewise long makeout sessions may be off the table as the need not to pass out from oxygen deprivation overrides the romance of the moment.
- Runny noses… well, at least you’re putting the tissues you keep beside the bed to good use, right? And if you’ve never had sex with a tissue stuffed into each nostril to stem the snot flow, then you haven’t lived, I tell you!
- Forget about outdoors sex, all that pollen is just gonna make you miserable. Sure, the outdoors is all wild and sexy but maybe it’s time to invest in a plastic fern or two instead…
- Not feeling too spontaneous… all the planning and limitations involved in managing your symptoms can leave you feeling less than free sexually. I’ll just have my secretary pencil in 9pm by the air conditioner, on the lounge where I can reach my nasal spray comfortably then, shall I?
- Lacking sexual confidence. Yep, it can be easy to feel like an unsexy blob of goo when your allergies are in full swing. Your partner probably still thinks you’re the hottest and most adorable thing since Vin Diesel (don’t even try to argue with me), but you can’t help but feel as sexy as Mr Bean. Bummer.
- You can’t sleep because you can’t sleep so you feel tired and lethargic. This can be draining and rob you of your usual spark
- Your sense of smell and taste are impaired and a lot of the sensual triggers you are used to receiving from those senses are out of the game
- All these things can work together to lower your sex drive
But don’t lose heart. You are not doomed to sexless hell. With a little preparation and some mutual compassion in your relationship/s you don’t have to have a “Celibate Spring”. Visit your doctor and follow their guidance to manage your symptoms. Eliminate triggers in your environment as much as you can. Sex indoors doesn’t have to be confined to your bed or your couch. Get creative. Master the art of the quickie. Use sex toys together. Even if you are really not up to sex, or as much sex as usual, don’t neglect each other physically and emotionally as a result. And don’t play the blame game. It can be frustrating and you may feel grumpy but it is no one’s fault and it will pass. Cuddles, flirting, massages, caresses and other forms of intimacy will keep you connected, your relationship healthy and keep the flames fanned for when you’re ready to get really steamy together again.
Another type of allergy could effect your body could be sensitive to is the material the adult product is made from. Genitals are a sensitive thing and if you put the wrong thing on them they can get very upset. The vagina is particularly sensitive, and as such if people have sensitive skin then there are a range of products I recommend that you should avoid.
- Jelly Sex Toys: Any soft jelly rubber sex toys use a range of chemicals to keep them soft. You’ll notice that some toys, give off a slight odor. These toys can cause skin irritation and mild to severe burning sensations. Further, some of the jelly toys will give off a slight greasy appearance and when you run your hands on them and smell your hands the smell will transfer on them. Whilst the safety of these toys, which contains phtalates, is debatable as it is considered by some academics to be carcinogenic (cancer causing). If it burns, you need to immediately stop using them, have a shower with a skin friendly soap and wipe off what you can. If you just can’t get past the softness of these toys, wrap them in a condom before use. As the ‘greasy’ toys are essentially decomposing in a way you must ensure that you keep these toys separate from others because if they come into contact with others they have a tendency to ‘melt’ over each other.
- Phthlate Sex Toys
- Cheap Sex Toys: The cheaper the dildo – the more of a guarantee it is toxic. You may be tempted to buy the $10 bright red see-through dildo (they are kind of cool looking)…but you will get what you pay for. Though those brilliantly colored crystal jelly dildos are cheap – they are toxic! In fact the word “jelly” is pretty much synonymous with toxic in the sex toys world.
- Smelly Sex Toys: Toxic sex toys have a strong chemical smell, which never goes away completely even after repeated washes.
- Elastomers: Some see through dildos are toxic. If it is see-though and flexible and soft, it’s probably toxic. A few see-though dildos are made with a substance called “elastomers”; those are safer in terms of not containing phthalates but are still porous and unsterilizable so should be used with a condom and ideally not anally. See-through hard plastic is safe, too, but a much less desirable texture for a toy.
- Lubrication: If you find that your lubricant is causing you sensitivity issues, have a look at the ingredients. If it contains methyl Paraben then chances are you have an allergy to it. Make sure you either stick to a silicone lubricant which doesn’t cause any irritation, switch to a natural lubricant, or avoid any lubricants with any kind of parabens with it. Most warming and cooling lubricants contain parabens but there are a few, including the Pjur Med Warming glide which uses natural warming ingredients as opposed to parabens
- Condoms: If you have a reaction to a condom you could be allergic t either the lubricant or the latex. Switch to a lubricant free condom and add your own safe lubricant, or move to a latex free condom like the Skyns. Once you work out whether you’re allergic to the lubricant or the condom you’ll be able to get back to having some clean dirty fun!
Lots of love, from the devoted partner of a sexy, snotty, gorgeous, allergic-as-hell guy. Our fake plants are doing wonderfully, by the way.
By Jade a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres
Rick is the owner of the Adultsmart, an online sex toy shop that stocks a huge range of adult orientated prouducts. He has been involved in the adult lifestyle industry for more than 25 years. Rick is an active sex blogger who provides a wealth of information and experience. He is an advocate of equality for gender and sexuality.