Stay Safe by Sexting This Holiday Season

Flirting

We all need a lot more affection in our lives in the age of a pandemic. It’s been a trying time for everyone to find ways to feel human again. A sense of touch, smell, and sound of a sexual partner in crime has been taken away from those who are single and ready to mingle. In today’s world, we are to stay at a minimum of six feet away from everyone who is not in our own household. The scent of the perfume is harder to get a whiff of when farther away. Masks are worn in public, while adding a sense of mystery to one’s appearance, also muffle the sound of a sexy voice. How is a sexual single who may have been more sexually active pre-pandemic to get their needs met in this scenario? Well, one sure bet to stay safe and sexy while at home is sexting.

 

This is about staying safe, being considerate of others but still finding alternative ways to get off. As it’s vital to stay isolated as much as possible it’s equally as vital to feel connected every day. We are more sexually repressed now than we have ever been in decades past. Even when the world was more sexually inhibited in the 30s, 40s, and 50s there was no stay at home order in place in those eras. This is a very new thing for humankind to go through while still trying to have somewhat of a life. Especially a sexual one!

What Are Sexting Ice-Breakers?

 

Just like approaching a woman in a bar, it can be tricky for the naturally more shy/introverted man to think of the right things to say. With sexting, a lot of the stress of having a good conversation starter is off the table. There is no small talk necessary, you’re in a space where you get to focus on having your sexual desires met at a distance.  When you sext it’s about establishing what your kink factor is before anything else. Not asking someone “How was your day?”.  Here are a few sexting icebreakers below to help you get the party started via your smartphone.

Are you Vanilla/Hardcore?

What are you wearing?

Guess what I’m wearing right now…

What’s your fetish?

Do you like being bad/good?

How wild are you on a scale of 1-10?

Are you into group sex?

 

Finding out what your kinks/desires are is half the fun of sexting. The other half of the fun is finding out what the women are on into the receiving end of these sext messages.  It’s the easiest conversation starter, to ask/tell a woman you are sexting with what you may be into/are open to knowing more about before hooking up. Maybe you are more Vanilla but curious to know more about what a hardcore sexting exchange might be like. It’s good to mix things up and you will find sexting is really about uncovering what really drives you and turns you on.

Where To Start?

 

A long-standing, reputable, and fun place that caters to the sexting community is Arousr. There’s no better place to start sexting than to do so anonymously. This way you don’t have to worry about saying the wrong thing to someone in your inner circle that might lead to awkward social gatherings or gossip when things do eventually open again. Discretion is key when it comes to sexting. When you are not required to reveal your identity it adds an extra little bit of freedom to go wild. You never have to worry about a chat host holding what you say against you. They are there to cater to your sexual needs and desires, whatever those may be.

Yes, you can always text people you know for free. If the texting you do now led to hot steamy sexting you wouldn’t be here reading this blog. In life, we tend to get what we pay for. Sometimes the hottest woman you know may simply not be into sexting or actually be terrible at it. When you use platforms tailored around feeding sexual desires you’ll find a lot less trouble, hassle, and headache, all while maintaining your anonymity. Feeling secure and safe in a sexual environment is what we all need to have an enjoyable experience.

Final Thoughts On Sexting

This year was a tragic one for many but it’s also a teachable moment. One thing we know is that if we want good things in life we must invest in them. That does not exclude our sex lives. Waiting for things to open to be flirty and reach sexual pleasure is not realistic nor is it healthy, both mentally and physically. It’s enough to make anyone go stir crazy being stuck inside with no place to safely go.

It’s very healthy to seek out ways to express yourself through the written word and can also be quite cathartic. It’s sexy, safe and it is a lot of fun when you have an open-minded woman on the other end to enjoy sexual banter with. Now is the best possible time to step outside of your comfort zones and try something new. Sexting is safe, stimulating, and much more personal than streaming porn or Netflix all day.

About the Author

 

I’m Femme Fatale, writer, and Sexpert. I have a vast knowledge and affinity for Fetish culture as a former Fetish model. You can find me every week writing for Arousr. My favorite fetish is Domination.

 

 

 

 

The Psychology Behind Human Puppy Play

human puppy play

Puppy play is a sexual practice where human participants take on the role of dogs. Generally, this activity seeks the achievement of sexual satisfaction through submissive/dominant interactions, where an adult adopts the behavior and appearance of a pup and the second adult takes on the persona of a dominant master. While the activity is most specifically referred to a type of a sex game within a couple, there are also group activities with the participation of more pups and a handler, a single pup and multiple handlers, or just a pack of dogs. The practice evolved over the time from an intimate role play between two people to a community phenomenon that is said to foster social interaction and help people relax by escaping the daily responsibility of adult life. In some cases, puppy play does not involve any sexual activity.

What motivates people to engage in puppy play?

People engage in puppy play for several reasons. Studies conducted on puppy play enthusiasts revealed 5 aspects that motivate humans to participate in such an activity. These aspects include:

1. Sexual pleasure

Many people engage in puppy play for receiving sexual pleasure. While some participants associate puppy play with a prelude before physical intercourse, other consider it a direct source of sexual pleasure. The sexual pleasure is generated by the dominant or submissive role that the participant takes on during the scene. For pups, being physically and emotionally obedient to a powerful handler can stimulate their sexual desire and make them feel wanted.

From the handler’s point of view, the fact of gaining full control over the body of the submissive element can be a determinant source of sexual arousal. Being on four legs, the pup exposes intimate parts that facilitate the development of a dominant sexuality for the handler. It can be the exposure of genitals that works as an invitation to the master to begin penetration. To increase the submissive sexuality and make the handler more aroused, many participants use plug-ins and other insertion devices along with straps around the waist and neck.

2. Relaxation

For many participants, puppy play is a source of relaxation. They deem this practice an efficient way to escape the daily responsibilities of adult life. By taking the role of a pup, people escape the adult inside them that comes along with stress and strains at work and personal life, and adopt instead a sort of childish exuberance where they are not burdened with duties and are free to do anything they want without being judged for doing something inappropriate for adults.

3. Playful physicality

Puppy play is not only a psychological element, but it also has to do with fighting your body inhibitions. The participants can engage in puppy-like activities that help them escape their own body and get a better sense of their physical appearance. Running on four legs around the house, rolling the ball with the nose, jumping for joy, spinning crazily in circles and playing rough with other pups as well as other playful activities allow you escape to another setting where, you do not have to behave in a way that it is socially acceptable for an adult.

4. Expressing self-hood

Another factor that motivates people to engage in puppy play is getting a better understanding of who they are and working on developing new personality traits. By playing dumb as a dog, people can see how far they can reach while escaping the boundaries of socially acceptable behavior, testing, in a way, their ability to do crazy stuff. For shy and reserved participants, this practice gives them the chance to learn being more confident and bold in their actions.

Those that take on the role of handler can develop their ability of taking care of others and being responsible for someone’s safety, as they have to keep an eye out for the pups, feed them, rub them and so on. This is especially recommended for selfish people who want to stop being so self-centered.

5. Promoting social interaction

Puppy play helps also create a sense of community, by providing positive interactions between participants. Joyful group activities with the ball and other toys as well as rough-and-tumble play with other dogs allow create strong friendship ties that will be later applied in real life after the scene is over.

Spice up your sex life with the help of ThePornDude!

Dude porn

It is easy to build a routine and follow it day after day, but that can become rather boring. Keep in mind that one should not have to wait for their sex life to become dull to experiment with new pleasures. Nevertheless, if your sex life has become a bit repetitive and you need a change of pace, below you have some tips that might come in handy!

Sex positions

To start it off easy, you could always incorporate new sex positions into your usual sex routine. Keep things interesting with different sex positions. For those who did not know, there are over 100 different positions you could try out in bed, so if you have only been doing the standard five so far, now is the right time to try something new.

 

Sexting

Sometimes, sexting and mind games really do a lot for us. Try sexting each other before the night comes, as you tell each other what you would love to do. Sexting can be very hot if it is done right, and if you and your partner are into dirty talking, it’s even better. Push the limits, and learn how much you are comfortable with.

Don’t disregard the beauty of anticipation from sexting to a simple gesture of ass pinching when saying goodbye. Next time you follow your partner to the shower, do dirty yet innocent things, pretend. After a bit of a build-up, the two of you are bound to engage in some memorable lovemaking.

Have a quickie

This might sound a bit odd to some, as how could a quickie spice up your sex life? Well, a quickie does not always have to be in the midst of an argument about a meaningless topic. Do not underestimate the impact the element of surprise can have. Know how to read the room and surprise your partner with a quickie, oral, or anything else they might enjoy.

 

Explore each other’s fantasies

What turns you on? What turns your partner on? Discussing such simple topics is crucial if you want to have a healthy sex life. The problem many people have is that they think that their fantasies are weird, or a bit too “out there” but in most cases, that is not true. Your partner might be thinking the same thing you are.

Roleplaying

This could be seen in the same categories as fantasies, and in case you are into roleplay, you might want to consider going full out. Roleplaying can be rather fun, devious, and addictive, and if both of you dedicate yourself to your roles, dress up and do all the necessary work, the actual lovemaking act will be a lot more pleasurable! Of course, roleplaying is not meant for everyone, but don’t knock it until you try it.

Watch porn together

If you are unsure of your own fantasies, maybe it is time to start from zero. Search through your favorite porno websites, and check out the content, find something that excites you. With so many porn websites you can find listed on ThePornDude.com, you’ll surely find one that makes you want to try it out. Take your time and explore your own fantasies first.

 

You could also consider watching porn with your partner. This way, you could see which part of the video turns them on, what they searched for, and what kind of sex play they prefer. Of course, before you try anything out in the bedroom, which might be seen as hardcore, make sure that your partner is up for it beforehand.

Switch roles

Of course, this does not mean that you need to do something you are not comfortable with. But, if you are down to trying out new roles, then give it a go. In other sense, you could think about switching up the domination/submission roles as you get to see new aspects and beauty of BDSM lovemaking.

Sex toys!

This should be an obvious one, but if this did not cross your mind, consider using sex toys! This does not only imply the sex toys for her; there are plenty of pleasurable sex toys for men that could be used in the bedroom. Once you learn your likes and dislikes, it will be much easier to pick the sex toys that make both of you satisfied.

Sex in the shower

This is a big cliché, but it actually does work! If you would like to spice up your sex routine, try doing it in the shower. Now, this might require you actually to have a shower. Waiting for your partner to get soaking wet, before you surprisingly jump with them in the shower, could be just the sexy surprise they were waiting for!

BDSM Dating 101: What to Look for in a Master

Masterful bdsm

A successful BDSM relationship truly depends on the people involved. Though your attention is focused on sexual activities, you should focus on finding the right partner and also being a good partner. And that’s easier said than done. If you’re interested in exploring master online dating, then you should know what to look for in a master. That way, you’ll choose a partner who will provide you with a safe and fun S&M experience. Here are eight qualities to look for when finding a master.

 

They focus on aftercare

Many people make the mistake of assuming the most important part of an S&M relationship are the sessions themselves. That’s not true. The most important part of an S&M relationship, aside from communication, is aftercare. These sessions take a physical and emotional toll on both master and slave; aftercare is crucial to process the experience and wind down. A good master is someone who values aftercare and sees the importance in it. If a master doesn’t appreciate or invest in aftercare, they’re not concerned about the emotional and mental health of either person.

 

Honesty

Without honesty, your S&M relationship won’t last. In any relationship, honesty is a must. Your master needs to be completely honest and open with you and vice versa. Nothing should be hidden from you; you both need to be open books. He should be able to discuss his previous relationships and answer any questions you have. If he’s hiding information or blaming the failings of his past relationships on his exes, that’s a huge red flag. Before anything, honesty needs to be a foundation in your relationship.

 

They have experience with S&M

Of course, you may meet a master that’s relatively new in the community, and that doesn’t mean they’re going to be bad. But this does mean they lack experience. And if you’re new in the community, it’s always a good idea to start off with someone who has some experience under their belt and a positive reputation. With an experienced master, you’ll be able to learn the rules and techniques that new masters may not know.

 

There’s vanilla chemistry

If you want to have a good S&M relationship, there needs to be basic chemistry between you two. If you’re not attracted to them as a person, then how can you allow them to be your master? He also needs to like you as well. You don’t need to be in love with each other, but you need to like each other. You’re entering a very intense dynamic, and if you’re not interested in them as a person, it will be a problem.

 

They have limits

If a master tells you they don’t have a safeword or they don’t have any personal boundaries, run. Everyone in BDSM needs to have personal boundaries and limitations. BDSM isn’t the wild west where you can do whatever you want to someone else. This doesn’t mean the boundaries are static; with time they can change. However, everyone has their limits. A good master understands this and respects their slaves physical and emotional boundaries.

 

They’re interested in self-development

In BDSM relationships, both people need to be interested in self-development. That’s the only way you can progress and become a better slave/master. A good master is interested in self-development and is constantly working on themselves. He wants to learn from his mistakes and be the best master possible for his slave. That is the type of master you want, someone who wants to be the best they can be for the relationship.

 

You share the same life pattern

Having chemistry is essential, but you need more than that for a successful S&M relationship. You and your master also need to have the same lifestyle. If he’s working nights and you’re working days, there’s a conflicting schedule. If he’s very social, but you’re more of a homebody, that could become a problem. Finding a master with a similar lifestyle will make things easier to manage. Considering how everyone’s schedule is very busy today, this is more important than you think.

 

They have empathy

Your master needs to be good at reading and understanding you. With time, your master should be able to predict your responses to specific acts. Of course, communication is an essential element of empathy. They not only should understand and sense how you feel, but they need to communicate these thoughts with you. If you’re sensing a master lacks empathy, run. If they lack empathy, they could cause physical and emotional harm to you.

 

Finding a master isn’t hard, but you want to find the right master for you. Take your time and find a master who has these qualities. It may take some time, but patience pays off.

 

Get your bdsm gear here!

10 Fetishes You Ought To Know!

ear fetish sexual attraction

Many people don’t have any idea about Fetishism or Fetish.  Erotic fetishism or sexual fetishism is a kind of sexual arousal that a person receives from physical objects or from specific situations. These objects or situations are referred to as a fetish. The person who has a fetish for that particular object is known as fetishist. Sexual fetishism may be done by an individual but is often interlaced with another person or persons that share that common fetish.

fetish of large tall giants

The people (whether they are men or women), who like erotic fetishism, can be aroused by unusual parts of the body, or activities as well as objects that are usually not used in regular sex. Its desire is so strong that some people may not get fully sexually satisfied without using a fetish object, imagining fetish objects or creating a fetish scene that can encompass a whole range of role-playing or locale. This often makes the fetish scene seem underground and bizarre yet in truth it may be different but is no more unusual or bizarre than the BDSM scene.  Some fetishes are non-sexual too and may be as simple as dressing up as animals ‘furrys’ or as your favorite action character  ‘cos play’.

There are various kinds of sexual fetishes each different from the other yet all  have their own way to get erotic pleasures. Some people concentrate on parts of the body such as legs, feet, bottom, hair, armpits along with various other parts of the body. In contrast to that, some people involve sex by creating certain kind of scenarios including bondage, spanking, dominant / submissive role playing, trampling as well as cross-dressing. Along with these people, there are many others, who like to wear certain kind of fabrics or clothing for stimulation including rubber, latex, leather or even angora sweaters. Thus there are an unlimited number of scenarios and objects that are used.

There are many people, who have considered sexual fetishism as a sin as our society labels anything  that differs from conventional sex as perverted or deviant. These kinds ideas are narrow minded and in all probability those purporting to have these ideals have hidden fetishes themselves. There should be no boundaries (except legal) in how people wish to express their sexual freedom and who want to enjoy their sexual life in non traditional ways with their fetishes. according to their sexual needs and requirements. People who don’t fulfill their sexual needs will be frustrated and unlikely not be sexually fulfilled that has equal importance in the people’s well-being as many other things like fitness and diet. One should not compromise and be explore their fetish as otherwise there will be something missing in their life and may make wrong choices in order to fulfill that void.

Some fetishes include:

  • Babification – Adults that dress up, act as and wanted to be treated as infants. children are those people that appreciate being an infant once more. They may appreciate relapsing mostly or totally, partaking in the demonstration of wearing diapers, being looked after by a grown-up, sucking on an infant container or pacifier, dressing up in infant garments, crawling as opposed to walking and talking in “infant” talk. People inspired by infantilism in all probability appreciate not having responsibilities at home and many are often in high pressure occupations away from.

  • Swinging – is generally when a married couple or those that have been in a very long-term relationship wish to experiment sexually with other people (mostly other couples also in long-term relationships) whilst remaining together.  They will often gather at swinging parties where they may wife swap or allow the other partner to have sex with another whilst watching.  It is essential to note that the relationship of the swinging couple must be strong prior to venturing into this fetish as if the reason is to make it better it will generally be the demise.
  • Water Sports or Urolagnia –  is the demonstration of being turned on by pee, whether it is the sight, feel or smell of it. It might include the fulfillment or demonstration of washing in pee also. Regular sorts of Urolagnia include: wetting one’s self or the perception of someone else wetting themselves while completely dressed, watching the demonstration of somebody relieving themselves in the washroom or going about as a human urinal, otherwise called accepting or giving a “golden shower”.  It might include the craving to urinate out in the open or watch another person do as such. What causes this sort of interest? Nobody truly recognizes what causes this and necessities to end up held up in our brains, however people that are into this sort of obsession portray sentiments of freedom when urinating in broad daylight and satisfaction when someone relieves themselves on them.
  • Cross-Dressing – People that cross-dress wear clothes and adornments of the “opposite sex.” Cross-dressing is more normal than you may might suspect,  influencing mainly hetero and gay men – although some women will cross-dress as men too. There are an assortment of explanations behind cross-dressing; it might be that the individual does not feel the sex they were naturally born with fits who they are. It might be that they are excited by the radical thought of wearing something “prohibited” to them. It might be that they just appreciate the distinctive part of design not normally accessible to them in public. Cross-dressing has turned out to be more accepted by society in recent years with shops and online boutiques showcasing particularly to cross-dressers.

  • Foot fetishism –  is a common one.  It is the most well-known fixation of the non-genital body parts. Sigmund Freud offered the clarification that individuals build up this interest because of the way that the human foot looks like a penis. Regardless of what the reason, foot worshiping is a well known interest with 90 percent of the fetishists being male. It can include the foot alone, or feet, shoes and socks or leggings. Maybe it has to do with how we are wired, with our brains responding to various delight focuses on our bodies. People that are not into this fetish may  still appreciate having their toes sucked every so often.
  • Sado-Masochism – Spanking a butt can bring about excitement for some individuals.   More severe discipline may take us back to our adolescence, make us feel loved and cared for, which many people find a turn on. It can likewise be a piece of mastery and subjugation with the master or mistress directing the spankings taking control of the subordinate/slave. Whatever it is that we appreciate about punishment its a regular and common fetish.
  • Exhibitionists/Voyeurism – People appreciate watching sex or uncovering themselves in broad daylight. Men are more voyeuristic than ladies with 12 percent of men being stimulated while watching sexual acts contrasted with 4 percent of ladies. As shown by statistics from the sex industry, 80 percent of people watching porn are men. Exhibitionism is an alternate story however and almost all of us have done it.  It is not just about taking off all your clothes but wearing something more seductive, showing a bit more leg or opening the shirt button a little extra.  Doing anything for the purpose of showcasing our bodies is a form of exhibitionism and who has not been guilty of that?

  • Rubberists -this fetish is demonstrated by those that either get sexual satisfaction from wearing or having someone wear rubber, leather, latex, vinyl or other material. They are colled “rubberists”. The tight material goes about as a sort of sexual servitude. For a few, the odor of elastic/latex/cowhide may likewise be a turn on. The interest can extend from wearing the more traditional sorts of things, for example, a cat suit to something more extreme like a gas mask.
  • Role Playing -Sexual role playing scenarios includes two or more people carrying out various parts to create a sexual situation. It can be any kind of sexual fantasy. Couples could role play in a certain place,  or during a certain activity or a certain way.
  • BDSM – This stand for bondage, domination and sado masochism so entails a great deal.  BDSM is a general fetish that in itself contains hundreds more and may be any on or all of these words.  Generally it is accepted that those doing Bondage play have “an arrangement of practices, traditions, and customs including the giving by one individual to another individual control over them”. It includes punishment and domination but between two consenting adults. This can be as a one-time event, occasional practice or always in their relationship.  Many times couples reverse roles in different sessions.

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