Meet Velvet d’Amour – The World’s First Plus Sized Super Model!

 Adultsmart is proud to introduce Velvet d’Amour to our lifestyle community blog.  Velvet is the first plus-sized female to make it as a ‘super-model’ in Paris and is the founder of Vol Up 2 magazine which has an emphasis on curvy women, as well as those forgotten by fashion. Welcome and thank you for agreeing to participate in this interview.

Thanks! My pleasure.

Velvet d'Amour Interview
Interview With Velvet

You were born in USA and achieved a Bachelor of Fine Arts at the NYC School of Visual Arts.  What did you learn there?

Yes, I am a proud native of Rochester, NY. My major at SVA was actually Illustration, because I thought that meant I could make Fine Art and get paid for it, lol But in the end my focus tended to be on photography.

You spent a year abroad in Florence Italy.  What was the inspiration for you to spend time there?

I did. I adored it and it actually gave me the impetus to move to Europe.

As an artist, pretty much everything about Italy is inspiring, especially the men, LOL Realistically, the vibe of Italy suggests a time when artists were sincerely valued and art was incorporated into every facet of life. Each corner you turn is adorned in sculpture, and even when I studied there, you could come across a random opera singer singing on the street. They would have an evening where they made a never ending dinner table down the middle of the street, so everyone shares dinner together! Just living in a manner that feeds the soul through connection was inspiring.

James White Instagram

But I was very fortunate to have James White as my Photography teacher in Florence and he is so genius as a teacher, as he could see my passion for photography and he would be so supportive and encouraging. He even gave me a key to the darkroom, which was in this astoundingly beautiful centuries old building and I would spend hours and hours there developing my film and agitating my prints to life.

Velvet D’Amour Photographer

It is there that you developed a passion for fashion photography.  Tell us a bit about that?

I always had a passion for old photos, my parents were much older when they had me so I was always looking at these amazing old black and white pics from the 40’s and my love of fashion and photography initially stemmed from there.

In High School I took my first photography class, and it was fun to try to shoot fashion even at that early age. Then in college I would always peruse photographers like Helmut Newton, Herb Ritts, Bruce Weber, Steven Meisel and Ellen Von Unwerth, they were some of my favorites back in the day and their work definitely influences my own.

But as a Fine Art Major they forced us to take photography with a Pentax K1000 and I was so intimidated by technology that I had previously just worked with crappy little automatics, but when I managed to learn how to deal with the Pentax I really feel in love with the instant gratification that photography provided.

As a Fine Artist I was very interested in figurative studies so drawing and painting could take eons to complete a concept whereas with photography in the simple snap of an image I have made my statement. Voila!

And at the time very few women were fashion photographers so it was quite cool to delve into a subject that was formerly very much a male terrain.

Velvet d’Amour modeling

You then went onto the other side of the lens and started modeling.  How did this happen?

When I was in High School I’d go out and inevitably people would ask if I was a model because I was tall-ish at 5’8. So they had one of those Model Agency Scout things come to a mall in the suburbs where I grew up and I went and was told I, “had the face of talent” but at 140 pounds I was too fat to model so they suggested I lose weight. I had been competitively swimming for ages and so my body had that tiny waist huge shoulders thing and then I did shot-put and discus on track so let’s just say I was hardly the breakable Kate Moss flavored model of the moment. So I went about losing weight to try to get signed to an agency by doing a 500 calorie diet which was so not healthy, and since it was the 80’s and most models were on the cocaine diet, lol, I wasn’t about to be getting emaciated anytime soon, since your body can’t maintain 500 calories eternally. So when I started yoyo dieting I gained weight and I was having difficulty, as so many young women do, to accept and love my body. I read FAT IS A FEMINIST ISSUE and I went to see a therapist and I started to try to find examples of bodies in mainstream media that were like my own and there were none. Maybe at the Opera but beyond that, nada.

When I started shooting models who were signed to agencies they were the IDEAL, and yet I would see that they too were struggling to accept their utterly idealized bodies! So to me it was a bit of a mind-fuck putting it bluntly, that no women were loving their bodies! So given those two concepts, I started to use myself as a piece of subversive art through photography, by emulating the poses and flavors one would see in mainstream fashion magazines but with myself.   At the time it was considered exceedingly audacious but I was making a point.

Velvet Plus Sized Model

When I moved to Paris they had just opened the first plus size model agency in France, AGENCE PLUS, I knew that very few photographers were interested in shooting plus size models so I offered my services and I sent a photo showing that I was a plus size woman myself. They said they would like to meet me first as is normal for photographers but when I went in they said they wanted to hire me AS A MODEL!?! So while I couldn’t get signed to an agency as a young straight size model, I actually ended up getting signed at age 39 and near 300 lbs. We were able to use all the shots I had created as an artistic revolution as my portfolio and my book ended up standing out a great deal from other plus size agency models, as well as the fact that I was the fattest model ever to be signed to a model agency.

Agence Plus France

What was most exciting about this was that I had come to love myself and thereafter this gift of getting signed came along and that was such a lovely payoff to the self esteem I had worked so hard to build.

For most people this would be more than enough to occupy all of their time but you then became a recording artist.  When did you learn to sing?


I always loved to dance, and in high school they had a SHOW DANCE group, but in order to audition you had to sing. So being typical me, I was making fun of singing Opera and the teacher heard me, and said I had A GIFT! I ended up getting into NYSSMA, which is the best young singers of New York State, and was fortunate enough to spend a summer being taught by the best, up in Saratoga Springs, NY. And from there also studied opera in NYC and Italy.

In 2006 you starred in the film Avida as the main character Avida.  That must have been a hell of an experience! How did it come about that you got that role?

The very first casting I went in through my French model agency was for the role of AVIDA. They were looking for a very fat women who didn’t take issue with being naked. The nudity was part of the film as art and the role was quite interesting as she was an aging singer who had become quite depressed and wanted to commit suicide in a very spectacular manner. When I went to the audition I was able to sing some opera, which was quite fun and unexpected, lo,l but because they saw me as ‘too glamorous’ I didn’t end up getting the role!

Velvet VIP

So as a sort of joke, you get that I’m a bit of a jokester at this point, lol I had my friend take THE most unattractive images you ever did see of ME! Then I sent them and thanked them for seeing me as such a glam doll. WELL they ended up calling me back! UGLY PICTURES PAY DAMMIT! lol They said the person they had gone with ended up being more American than Belgian and I ended up being more Belgian then American so they went with me in the end.

I had a blast shooting it! The guys who made it are kinda like the Saturday Night Live comedians of France, very antiestablishment Frenchies, quite funny, always drunk and laughing and having an absolute BLAST while they make ART. So I had pretty much forgotten about it when they called me in NYC where I was at the time and they said THE FILM HAD MADE IT INTO THE CANNES FILM FESTIVAL!!! Then it got into THE TRIBECA FILM FESTIVAL!!! So freakindeakin cool man!!!

Avida Cannes Film Festival
Avida Starring Velvet

It is a very artsy film, if you like Jacques Tati you’ll dig it.

The difficulty is that there are little to NO roles for women my size in film and that really needs to change. I mean think about how many fat people you see walking down a street. Then think about how many roles in films, let alone lead roles, where they include a fat woman. How many do you come up with? Maybe, GILBERT GRAPE? And most all involve pure mockery not any real substance. So it would be awesome if there was more inclusivity within film making and not just hiring thin actresses to wear fat suits, etc.

What do you feel the main differences are between still photography and moving pictures?

I actually make videos for VOLUP2 now so I live that difference, lol I think the possibilities in film are overwhelming when one is accustomed to still imagery. Still photography breaks down a millisecond in time, it literally stops time, whereas film is like liquid motion it can tell a million stories in a million ways and editing it down can be a bitch. But it is the future of fashion. I am currently working on a submission to Nick Knight’s SHOW STUDIO which is the Mecca of all Fashion Films.

Global Fashion Studios

And I have to agree with Nick that it is the future of fashion. It isn’t stagnant in any way and because clothes move with you it is one of the best ways to showcase fabric which in the end is what fashion is.

I love both arts and think they both have their place in the world.

Then you played as the lead dancer at a Lionel Banjo piece at the Pallais Chaillot at Trocadero.  Did you have any formal dance training prior to taking this part?

I was very into volunteering to help people with AIDS and HIV and as such I worked for a nonprofit and was collecting donations which I was rather brazen about, lol.  So at a restaurant one night I asked the cutie next to me if he would like to donate and we ended up becoming great friends. We both liked Hip Hop so we would go to this tea dance in Paris and spend hours and hours dancing all night there, it was SO FUN! He saw me dance and he was the administrator for the well known Lionel Hoche dance company MEME BANJO and so he said one night that he may have a role for me in their next piece! SUPER COOL! I played the role of a vegetarian ogress, lol.  And it actually was performed at the coveted Palais Chaillot Trocadero! I about passed out when I first got on stage. But the most difficult performing is live theater, having 1000 people staring at you while you dance and act in French is beyond the realm terrifying but it made everything else seem easy, so I am so appreciative that Lionel took a risk on me. I was very impressive with the sense of inclusion the world of contemporary dance had. Their bodies tend to be smaller by virtue of the work they put them through but there was a wonderful lack of judgment, not only from the dancers but from audiences as well.

I actually started out with dancing for Lionel before I modeled. It was Adam Vidocvic who ‘found me’ before anyone else.

Velvet on stage

As an influencer and female activist, your message has been that using yourself as a vessel of change combating the stereotyping of what a woman should be portrayed by mainstream media.  Where have you been most successful in achieving this?

I suppose by infiltrating high end Parisian fashion through taking the runway for John Galliano

Velvet and John Galliano

and then Jean Paul Gaultier

Velvet and Jean Paul Gaultier

would be considered my greatest coups. That, and getting into French VOGUE being included in an editorial shot by Nick Knight was great!

One of the preferred images I created with Maya Guez was…

(image too small to publish)

But I made my point by actively working to be included in editorial fashion so modeling for iconic photographers like Daniele Iango… Kourtney Roy Etc. So I feel pleased to have gotten as far as I did to work with so many incredible artists.

Velvet and Daniele Iango
Velvet and Courtney Roy

Thereafter, I ended up doing a reality TV show here in France called, CELEBRITY FARM where they ship pseudo celebrities off to work on a farm. But I was so fortunate that the year they included me, we were flown to the South African bush to care for animals!!! I actually managed to hang in there for 9 of the 10 weeks so I ended up beating out the vast majority of other celebrities, and the best part was each week you raise money for your chosen charity so I ended up making around $72,000 for ENFANTS DISPARU which helps missing and abused children and their families.

Velvet Celebrity Farm

My favorite part was feeding the crocs! I did get bit by a snake but that probably happens every 15 minutes in Australia, when one isn’t being attacked by a shark, so I won’t end up impressing anyone on here with that ,lol.

You describe your photographic works as allowing you ‘to share beauty that otherwise may be overlooked’.  What do you most enjoy in taking an alternate perspective of beauty?

I most enjoy sharing the beauty that is humanity, because mainstream media completely ignores it, and chooses instead to create optical illusions in order to drive capitalism, versus celebrating the innate beauty that each and every person is blessed with.  I encore bucking the norm and changing how society views beauty so that it may be more encompassing.

People often want to denigrate imagery which is inclusive of fat bodies in particular, because they like to perceive any admittance of such as a ‘Glorification of Obesity’ and therefore UNHEALTHY. Yet the reality is, by including only images of beauty which are now utterly unattainable- for anyone really, there was a point that like, 1% of the human population who happened to be young, white, able, size 0’s, who were 6 ft tall existed, but now you have all that plus retouching! So now even those few can’t attain the current beauty ethic, unless they can walk down the street Photoshopping themselves. This creates so much self loathing, which not only fat people are effected by, but the preponderance of the population! So while the topic of Health is the number one reason people cite as their reason for prohibiting fat bodies from mainstream media, they never touch upon Mental Health. And that is genuinely a crisis in modern society.

I have had a look at your magazine and personally love it.  What is the general feedback you get from viewers?

Thank you! We are fortunate to receive really positive feedback. People are craving to feel represented and I genuinely try to include numerous types of people who fashion has forgot. Why don’t we ever see burn survivors in fashion? Did you know that burns are the fourth most common type of trauma worldwide?!

Velvet Models

Why don’t we see amputees?

Amputee Model

Or people living with Albinism, Downs Syndrome, Wheelchair-bound, Treacher-Collins, Vitiligo, Alopecia, elderly, different ethnicities, sexualitys, the list of people that we systematically exclude is fucking endless, seriously.

Velvet and Racism

But I aim to change that, to ‘be the change I want to see’ in my own very small way. I actively showcase difference and NOT in terms of shock value, (which is where you MAY see some different types of people included in fashion, an able bodied model posing in a wheelchair for instance comes to mind), its more an exploitation of difference then a glorification of humanity.

Everyone has flaws and in your magazine you encourage people to revel in their imperfections.  What a fantastic outlook to have.  Did you ever battle to accept any of your own imperfections?

Yes, sure I did! In the end the mere fact that I was in a position to worry about my imperfections is a privilege in itself, as so many in the world suffer just to simply survive and that I am very conscientious of that.

But there certainly was a time I hated myself mainly because, like so many, I was working inordinately hard to achieve the unattainable beauty ideal through crash diets, and doctors would give me metabolizers and appetite suppressants etc etc which only served to make me fatter ironically.

I remember after losing like, 80 lbs the hair and makeup people that I was reping at a Hair and Makeup Agent in NYC encouraged me to join a popular plus size model agency there. I went to the open call and was told that – my nose was too wide, my face was too long and my eyes were too close set. I literally laughed out loud! I just couldn’t grasp that beauty could be so formulated! Thereafter, I ended up getting signed by Agence Plus in Paris and made it into so many coveted fashion spaces that it just went to show there is no formula. Period!

But what I think is one of the keys to self revelry is to honor those that came before you. Why put more respect into a system that is setting out to intentionally force you to reject yourself, so that you will invest in whatever they are marketing to you, versus dignifying the millions of ancestors that came before you?

You are a successful woman that has done so much in your life.   Where do you see yourself in ten years time?

Thank you! I very much live in the moment to be honest, so not sure, but hoping to be living each day to the fullest!


Please find Velvet’s links here!

Vol.UP.2 Magazine
Facebook Vol Up 2 Magazine
Instagram Vol Up 2 Magazine
Facebook Fan Page Velvet d’Amour


Velvet d’Amour on Linkedin


Rick is the owner of the Adultsmart, an online sex toy shop that stocks over 13,000 products. He has been involved in the adult lifestyle industry for more than 25 years. Rick is an active sex blogger who provides a wealth of information and experience. He is an advocate of equality for gender and sexuality.

VIP Interview Jay Moyes – Fetish Artist!

bdsm art

A warm welcome to Jay Moyes, active in the adult industry for the past 20 years.  Jay is an artist that started work for the AVN (Adult Video News) magazine originally to enter data and then progressing to managing the Production Art Department and writing and publishing his own column.  Now a graphic artist and webmaster Jay is a man that has been there and done that!


Welcome Jay, thanks for doing the interview.  To start off where are you based?

Porn Valley, California! It’s a group of suburbs Northwest of Downtown  Los Angeles. Also known as the San Fernando Valley.

How did you come to be in the adult industry?

As an artist, I’d already been working with adult content. I worked for QSM Books, Fantasy Makers, and Spectator Magazine in the San Francisco Bay Area. After living in Los Angeles for some time, my friend Chris at AVN needed help and knew I’d be a good fit. It was a really lucky break. Back then, the industry could be really tight, pun intended.

Your first job was with the industry Goliath AVN.  What was it like working there?

Thing is, while there’s huge presence, there’s a small core of people coordinating what happens. All this while a cyclone of chaos surrounds the place. The most important thing is to remain proactive and get as much done as possible. When my boss left, her replacement tried turning our department into a 9-5 operation. That manager didn’t last long.

It wasn’t uncommon for me to put in 12 hour days. Every Wednesday I’d do a full shift handling graphics, then write the BDSM events column.

It seems like you became a jack of all trades there.  Data entry, graphic design and columnist.  Which of these did you enjoy the most?

Hands down, the graphics. I knew just enough how to open Photoshop when I started, but Chris Lowden showed me quite a bit and lined me up with tutorials. When Tim Connelly came on board, he brought on Photoshop expert John Castro and a punk rock scientist named Ed Webb. While Webb knew nothing about Photoshop going in, his genius, combined with Castro’s skill were a huge source of inspiration for me. Webb exceeded our expectations in Photoshop and became one of our best cover artists. I learned volumes working with them. They’ve both gone on to much greater things than I could dream.

Six years is a fair amount of time to work in what must have been a pressure cooker environment.  How did you cope with the stress?

A joke I used to have, is you chant “I can’t believe they pay me to do this.” I took photos of naked people, joked with porn stars, got to work with stunning eye candy on the computer, and was paid quite reasonable for it.

What is the most interesting story you have from working at the AVN?

Bryn Pryor takes the blame for that one. He actually had the balls to make our own show that parodied the office. Paul Fishbein financed it, Bryn produced it, and a lot of our staff and friends were involved in it. It was called The Money Shot. We called in our porn star friends for cameo roles. My big part was as a performance artist in drag, drawing fetish art, then burning the pieces. This show was five years before YouTube started. We would have been a hit had it uploaded today.

From there you were headhunted by Eddie Van Halen to help with his porn company SLLAB.  Tell us a bit about that?

EVH wanted to start his own adult cable channel, with the best directors from the industry. His son Wolfie was still under 18, and we had to be quiet about it for custody issues. I was introduced through friends and EVH recruited me.

We started video production to get things underway. I was on board for The New Neighbors and Trophy Wives. I created the ads, helped with graphics and assisted with production.

Meanwhile I kept another iron in the fire as a consulting partner in the publicity firm, Black and Blue Media.

What he really wanted was Michael Ninn. I made the call to Red Light District and forwarded to Michael Eddie’s phone number.

The irony is the whole thing eventually fell through. Eddie married Janie Liszewski, Ninn’s publicist. Ninn asked us at Black and Blue Media to take over publicity for Ninnworx.

What was Eddie like?

He wasn’t at his best at the time. He was like the crazy friend with wild ideas. We’d talk in the middle of the night until daylight. EVH dreams big. But he didn’t know how the porn industry itself worked. We had some great marketing and talent. But we were on the tail end of the big features for porn. He had big money, but the network he wanted required an extra zero or two on the budget and a lot of patience.

Janie really did seem to be best for him. He changed his focus and went back on tour. He changed his look for her and intensified his approach on music. Janie could have suggested he keep the vision of owning an adult empire, but they seem happier this way.

Jay Moyes Art
Fetish Art

How do you find balance in life?

Is that what this is? There are two ways to look at this. The Navy Seals say when you can’t keep going, you’re only at 40 percent of what you can really do. On the short term that helps you push through some things. On the other hand, what happens when you are long past that and are honestly maxed out?

I have to acknowledge there are things I just can’t commit to, or everyone suffers. Last year, I had to step down from something. I wasn’t able to focus. The work on that project was falling apart. I recognized that and addressed it. They still want me to come back. If that time comes, I will have to put something aside to make things work.

Day by day, I prioritize specific things  If more gets done, that’s awesome.

One very important rule I have is regarding favors like work for exposure, work on the cheap, or stuff for friends. If I can’t enjoy it, get something out if it, or have fun, I’m absolutely not doing it for free, on credit or deferred.

If you don’t at least get something out of it emotionally, then doing work for “exposure” drains you.

Throughout you owned and operated your website  Tell us a bit about that?

I’ve usually had some kind of site going. Around the year 2000, I bought I used the domain as a portfolio for my work. What was funny was to find out there are at least five others with my name, but I did give them years to claim dibs.

The economic crash put that on the back burner until around 2012, when I could afford to get serious about art again. served as a blog and test bed for what new stuff we could do at Black and Blue Media.

I soon realized I had been out of the fetish scene too long. No one really cared who Jay Moyes was, if anyone cared to begin with. So I took what would be our own marketing advice and rebranded. I looked for an affordable domain, and created social media profiles to fit the brand.

That’s why you won’t find much from my site on LinkedIn and Facebook. Those are personal profiles that don’t fit the brand for

While Fetishartist is a good blog for my work, I also use it to spread love and respect for my peers in kinky artwork.

visit the fetish artist
fetish artist blog

How do you get your inspiration to create fetish art?

Most often, the scene is my studio. While I love anime and other artists, I’m inspired by the relationships and innovation I see at play parties and clubs.

As an artist, I have to acknowledge certain rules, yet push boundaries. Otherwise it is just cliché.

When I started there were only a few professional fetish artists in San Francisco, so it was easy to stand out. Los Angeles, and now the world is very different. Anyone can draw boots and a whip. Collectors want to see how far further you can take that.

What is your favorite piece?

Currently it’s a small piece called Red Bondage for Gallery 30 South in Pasadena. The piece is a painting of a male with a rope chest harness and clothespins on his nipples. The backside features CBT and military boot fetish. I’ve been improving my acrylic work and everything came together just right.

This could change tomorrow, each piece is a new set of goal posts and experiments. I’ve got a skateboard deck waiting for me to paint a Dominatrix and skate punk up ahead.

Whom else to do admire as an artist and why?

Artists tend to have long lists of people we admire. My firsts were Reji Matsumoto, Erte, and Ralph Steadman. Matsumoto is responsible for my latex fetish because as a teen I saw his women in colorful skin tight space suits.

As I grew, I learned a lot from the pen and ink work of Robert Williams. Now I’ve realized a lot of his inspiration came from sci-fi artist Virgin Finlay (also no stranger to erotica). Currently, I study the colors of work by Coop, who got some of his color work while collaborating with Frank Kozik to screen print posters.

Also a stint as a tattoo artist.  That must have been interesting?

In the 90’s, I did flash art for Kenny’s House of Pain in Santa Clara, and Rob’s Tattoo in Livermore. This was just as I was getting into Fetish. Martin Kenny may still have some of my kinky stuff on his walls.

Tattoo studios are like a compost heap of creativity. The scene may not look pretty, but it yields huge volume of good work.

Jay Moyes Art
Fetish For Life

What is the weirdest tattoo that you did?

The posters were the wildest. These were big, 11×14 jobs. Rob’s had a detailed dragon, with waves in the background. While I did a poster for Kenny’s called “Blazing Tattoo Guns of the Old West” with a Dominatrix riding a tat gun bursting out of a robot gunslinger’s chest. Man they were a lot of fun to do.

Martin Kenny asked me to do some sheets of flash art he could trade for other art. He wanted detailed, single needle, celtic knotwork that would challenge his rivals. It backfired though. He put it up on his walls and customers asked for it. The detailed, intricate pieces were a pain to tattoo, but they made him money, which was the important part.

You are a co-owner of black and blue media.  This is a business that describes itself as a marketing and publicity company that mixes adult tastes with mainstream entertainment.  How do you manage to pull that off and make the work unique?

There’s a huge difference between the adult industry press and mainstream journalism. Mainstream publicity relies on wire services, which distribute to major news outlets for a fee. Adult news sites don’t tend to follow those services. So you have to connect as directly with adult journalists as possible.

It’s not uncommon for Black and Blue Media to get contacted from a mainstream firm to reach the adult press. We even created an adult news wire service called, and our fees are quite reasonable.

A huge difference between Black and Blue Media and other firms is adult is a visually driven media. Most publicists come from a writing or journalistic background.

While at AVN, part of my job was hounding publicists for artwork. I’d get a press release about a new contract pornstar, with no photos of the star whatsoever. There’d be this huge pressure to publish the story, and we’d be sitting there going “With what? You sent us no photos of the chick!”

At Black and Blue Media, we know graphics are an integral part of a story in the press, even if we have to generate that art ourselves. That’s why it is such a pleasure working with people like Michael Ninn, who know how mandatory it is.

And my advice if you’re looking for more exposure, video is next on the list to sell your story to news media outlets. We’ve already collaborated with video editors in the past and done small scale video editing for projects.

Who do you most admire in the adult industry and why?

Michael Ninn, who has a very professional eye. Skye Blue, who set a high standard, yet gave us creative reign to do some of our best publicity work. Mistress Cyan, who has worked herself up from a small dungeon in Porn Valley to the large Sanctuary and DomCon franchises, while maintaining a dedicated leather family. Of course, Sherry Ziegelmeyer of Black and Blue Media, who did many things never conceived of in adult publicity, like starting the first viral alternative reality game to promote Michael Ninn’s The Four.

I also very much admire Peter Czernich of Marquis. He set the high water mark for fetish video and publishing before some in this business were even born. We got the rare honor to publish releases on when he covered fetish news. I love his latex photo work and always will.

What do you see yourself doing in another ten years’ time?


Kidding! But that should hit home the nature of how transient this business can be and how much changes virtually overnight.

Many are afraid of what could happen in the current administration, but you can’t have the delusion the adult business was ever invulnerable.

As an artist, no matter how liberal the authorities are, your job is to push boundaries. The difference between art and pornography isn’t the lighting. It’s the requirement to embrace the consequences and keep pushing ahead.

Personally, I’d like to see myself in some kind of retirement from work that requires offices and deadlines. So I can do things like finally tour, exhibit at art shows abroad, and meet more awesome kinky people who like high octane artwork.

Rick is the owner of the Adultsmart, an online sex toy shop that stocks over 13,000 products. He has been involved in the adult lifestyle industry for more than 25 years. Rick is an active sex blogger who provides a wealth of information and experience. He is an advocate of equality for gender and sexuality.

VIP Interview With Angela Lieben – Brand Ambassador Liberator!

VIP Interview

The adultsmart lifestyle community blog is proud to have with us today Angela Lieben.  Angela is a ‘pleasure activist’ who is in charge of Public Relations and Marketing for the world famous Liberator Brand that creates Bedroom Adventure Gear.  Liberator is well-known for their hand-crafted USA made intimacy furniture that enhances love-making for the ability to innovate positional lovemaking.  The brand focuses on bettering sexual relations and is highly recommended as an aid for people with mobility or physical impairments.


A big hello to you Angela.  We will start with the big questions first.  Tell me something that not everyone knows about you?

It’s my pleasure to take part in your interview. Thank you for inviting me to share my story.

A lot of people think my life revolves around sex, sex, sex and it does. But my first true passion and pleasure is cars, especially vintage! My dad was an import car specialist and he taught me all about foreign automobiles. I spent a lot of my summer vacations hanging around his shop. He eventually taught me how to change the oil in a 1972 Ferrari 365 Daytona. My husband is amazed at my ability to clock any car’s make and model at a glance.

I would love to get my hands on a vintage VW Karmann Ghia (or a 1969 Camaro RS) and do part of the restoration myself. There’s is something about the smell of gasoline and whir of an engine that really turns me on!

You have had quite a history in the adult industry.  I would love to explore some of them in more detail? You are a filmmaker, produced documentaries and also done the make-up for adult movies.  What motivated you to get into this genre?

My dream of working in the adult industry started an early age.

In 6th grade, I was assigned a project of “What You Want to Do When You Grow Up.” It was one of the most exciting projects ever in my young life. My first plan of action was to scour through my dad’s collection “girly” magazines—like Easy Rider, Playboy, Oui, and Penthouse. I spent days methodically cutting and pasting all the pretty, naked women posing with their products on my colorful poster board. The ladies were well-placed and represented my idea of working in the sex industry. But dad was not so pleased when he noticed his magazines were missing a few pages.

I was excited about sharing my hopes and dreams with my class and teacher. Sitting through what felt like hours, my classmates showed off their pursuits of working for the State Department or the FBI or the CIA. (I went to a State Department school.) Bemused, I sat patiently for my turn. I was confident and self-assured that everyone would be happy to see that I was different and going places other than the police academy.

Finally, my name was called. Standing in front of the class, I took a deep breath and shamelessly unfurled my poster and held it up proudly! “I want to work with sexy people,” I stated. (Audible gasps!)

First—nothing but silence. Then suddenly a torrent of nervous, tittering laughter. My poster of beautiful women was instantly snatched from my hands and I was roughly escorted from the classroom. My teacher was not amused, and to find out, neither was the school principal.

My mother, however; was proud of my project and defended my right to dream.

She said to me afterward, “If you’re going to work in the sex industry, then be the best you can be!” She recently told me that she is proud of all the work I’ve been doing.

Here is a chance for a bit of a plug!  Can you give us a list of some of the productions you were involved in?

I was the executive producer for a documentary called the Art of Fetish by Laurence Gartel. It was supposed to air on HBO, but nothing ever happened. From what I understand, the production is still in the can. I spent hours with the artist lining up people who live the BDSM lifestyle in Atlanta and we filmed scenes that featured everything from sploshing to bloodletting to flogging and orgies. People were really eager to share their kinks on film. There was a book released called the Art of Fetish which is available online at Schiffer books.

Angela Lieben Fetish
Fetish Book

I also produced, shot and edited a short documentary called Lightworship. It was for an art opening that I was curating at the Paradigm Art Space in Atlanta. I followed the renowned fetish photographer Victor around for a few months and filmed him working in the studio and darkroom. I’m very proud of that documentary—although I have no idea where the footage is today. I was one of the first people to ever “live-stream” the Lightworship event on the internet. (This was back when we were still using dial-up services.)

You also have owned your own erotic art gallery (Friction Art Gallery) in Atlanta.  Tell us a bit more about that?

I live for erotic art and being around creative people. The financial success and media coverage of Lightworship was the impetus for opening Friction Gallery. There were so many amazing fetish artists and photographers not being represented because they were deemed too dark. So, I thought, “what the fuck! I’m going to create a space.” Friction Gallery not only had a monthly art show, we also hosted a series of seminars focused on the BDSM community. Even back in 1999, I knew that BDSM and bondage would one day become mainstream. So, I was not surprised when 50 Shades hit the market.

Friction Gallery was unique in that the shows were invitation only. This concept worked in getting people interested in coming to not only see the art but purchase it too. I created a private space where people would not feel judged for looking at “dirty pictures.”


And to top it all off a sex educator and sex toy tester.  Which do you enjoy more?

I never thought in a million years that I would be a sex toy tester! That’s partly because sex toys were not as evolved as they are today when I first started writing about sex. I first started with Liberator five years ago and owned two vibrators (you know the plastic/jelly kind that takes batteries). Now, I have a collection of 200 sex toys altogether. You name it—I have it!  I enjoy testing sex toys and then sharing my experiences with others in an educational way.


Podcast Interview Liberator
Angela Lieben Podcast Interview


You are vocal about sex-positivity yet so many people get confused with its meaning.  What does it mean to you?

There is a lot of confusion surrounding the sex-positive movement. For me, being sex positive simply means being open to all expressions of sexual pleasure. Basically not yucking someone else’s yum.  What may feel good to one person may not do it for the next. Just because someone gets off on sucking on their partner’s toes does not mean they are deviant or bad. We should never be labeled or judged for enjoying the things that make us feel good. Also, I believe respecting our partner’s boundaries, as well as our own, is an essential component to being sex positive. And that also means getting and confirming consent!

You have your own blog called the pleasure activist.  Do you enjoy sharing your journey and advice on it?


The Liberator UnZipped blog was what started it for me. I thought, “why should I give my best ideas out when I can write them on my own blog.” When I first started my blog, I was a bit reticent about sharing my experiences. Part of that reason was that I went through a terrible breakup with a man who used my sexual history against me in court. But then I realized—who the fuck cares? My journey could actually help someone. There was another reason too—there are so many sex blogs now regurgitating the same information over and over. To stand out amongst the noise, I had to start incorporating personal anecdotes into my narrative. I love being authentic and laying it all out there. The writing is cathartic for me and has really helped me heal through some personal traumas.

Angela Lieben
Pleasure Activist Blog


What is the best piece of sexual advice you would give?

Please, get out of your head! As humans, we are our own worst critic. Stop listening to that judgemental inner-voice that says —Ewww! Sex is the one area of your life where you can be creative—whether it’s playing out fantasies or trying something you saw in a porn video. Release your inner critic and throw caution to the wind. You never know what pleasure you’ll find lurking inside your imagination. Do what makes your tail wag!



A career with the established and esteemed Liberator brand.  How did that come about?

I was working at a neuropsychology center and was extremely unsatisfied. I felt like an imposter because I could not be myself. But living in Atlanta, careers in the sexual wellness industry are limited. So, one day I called the CEO (Louis Friedman) and left him a voicemail saying, “you should hire me because your company needs it!” He called me back about an hour later and asked, “when can you come in?” I sat with him for about two hours sharing my ideas on content and marketing strategies. He and I clicked and have been working together ever since.


What is the best thing about being Liberators PR and Marketing manager?

Sometimes I have to pinch myself and ask, “is this real?” I love having a career in this industry and being able to use my marketing background. Every day is different and I am honored being the voice of such a famous brand! The main part of my job is developing content for the blog, copy for the website, and our email newsletters. I basically have my hands in everything from web development, content creation, art direction, erotic workshops—you name it, I do it. But the best part connecting with Liberator customers via social media. I feel that in order for any brand to be successful, you have to connect with customers on a personal level and communicate with them and share ideas. An added bonus, however; is I get to help with product new designs and testing them with my husband.

If you could describe what it is that makes Liberator a much loved (pardon the pun) company to consumers?

We put a lot of love into all of our products. Everyone who works here counts and plays an integral role in creating a product that is meant to enhance sex on all levels. There is a lot of thought and consideration that goes into every collection. For Liberator, we want to truly make a difference in people’s sex lives. Whether it’s helping with mobility or having a deeper, intimate connection with a lover, our products truly stand the test of time. Manufacturing Liberator in the USA gives us greater control over the product quality.


You were bullied as a teenager.  How did you overcome that?

Bullying is no joke! I am thankful for coming of age at a time when the internet and social media did not exist. There were days when I truly wanted to become invisible. My mother was the one person who helped me overcome the pain and trauma of being relentlessly bullied. She empathized with what was happening because she too was bullied when she was a teenager for being a refugee from East Germany. She taught me that it does not matter what anyone thinks and that I was meant to do great things with my life. She said that “the Lieben’s are tough and strong —and this time is only temporary.” Being reminded of the impermanence of life helped me push through and become the strong woman I am today.

Ange on Porn Set
Angie Lieben

Being labeled ‘a slut’ in your earlier years must have been difficult.  How has that motivated you being an advocate for women’s issues?

The word SLUT, when said out loud, has a very powerful effect. That one syllable word feels like a gut punch it’s being hurled at you! Whether it’s being whispered or yelled, the impact is always the same. It’s even more challenging for teenager girls who are still trying to figure out sexuality.

What I realize now, and wish I knew back then, is that slut used to demean—make someone feel small and bad for exploring sexuality. What I find appalling is men can sleep with a shit ton of women and they are labeled as STUD!

I want young girls and women to know there is absolutely nothing wrong in exploring sexuality. There is nothing wrong in having control over your own sexuality. Sex is power, especially for women. The ancient Greeks honored women for possessing sexual power! They held them to a higher standard. So, now when someone slut shames a woman—they are basically recognizing and acknowledging that inner power.


So, now when anyone calls me a slut—I tell them “thank you!”

Who do you most admire and why?

Hands down—Amber Rose. She’s a powerhouse and is unapologetic for the choices she’s made throughout her career. On top of that, she is extremely intelligent and not afraid to speak out about issues facing women today. There is a spark in her eye and personality that says, “don’t mess with me.” What I also love about her most the massive call-to-action with the Los Angeles SlutWalk. I went a few years ago and the energy was positively overwhelming. She is a warrior and is leading the charge for change in the way we view slut-shaming. God, I wish I could be more like her and not be so introverted.


Where do you see yourself in 10 years’ time?

That’s really hard to say! I’m working on a few projects right now. One is a book aimed at teenage girls and sexual self-discovery. The other a podcast with my husband. A lot can happen between now and 10 years—I see myself being surprised and grateful for all the opportunities. But in all honesty, I see myself being the CEO of a luxury sex to brand!


Once again thanks again for taking the time to do this interview with us.  I know that your time is extremely tight and valuable being the busy woman that you are.  We hope to catch up again with you sometime in the near future as your answers are both enlightening and honest.

Rick is the owner of the Adultsmart, an online sex toy shop that stocks over 13,000 products. He has been involved in the adult lifestyle industry for more than 25 years. Rick is an active sex blogger who provides a wealth of information and experience. He is an advocate of equality for gender and sexuality.

Porn Site Reviews!

Adult Movies

Porn sites are one of the best places where you can find the most amazing porn actions that will allow you to gain immense knowledge about sexual satisfaction. Modern day life keeps everyone busy making money to satisfy their basic needs running around all the time limiting spare time to concentrate on sex matters. Sex is an important aspect of life that needs to be taken seriously, we all need it and it is one of humanities basic desires.   Often it is difficult with such a limitation on time to satisfy your partner or even have a time for a partner with this hectic life. Many people have realized that one a time saving technique to maintain your sex life active is regular visiting to porn sites where there is relief from your carnal desires as well as the opportunity to learn something new. Watching porn can allow you to bring new and interesting things into a relationship.


Often it is difficult to to find where the best porn is on the internet and it gets frustrating clicking on the links google serves up to be disappointed by the content. This was until I learned about x3guide. This is a popular online porn platform that reviews thousands of porn websites and lists them down plus their links so that you can find the best porn site to visit that satisfies your needs. You find everything here from oral sex, amateurs, hardcore sex, Asian porn, blondes, threesome, big asses, big dicks, big tits, anal sex, blow job, lesbians, gays and any other type of porn that you have ever thought of.


Porn Site Reviews


One the most desirable aspects that guide you with the porn site reviews are coming across numerous reviews and testimonies where different people have gained a lot of experience by visiting their favorite porn sites with porn site reviews. This will make you delete that negative experience of getting generic sites with no original content and also allows you to share with like minded individuals that just love porn. Out of experience, I have been able to learn things and have fun with my my sex life back giving satisfaction viewing my now favorite porn sites.


Best Porn Discounts


The best thing about porn site reviews like x3guide is that they help you find the most popular porn sites that offer the best discount. Through reading the reviews, you will be able to go through comprehensive porn sites and a description of each porn discounts so that you can select the one that offers you the best discounts that suit your budget plans. Before settling on a particular website, you will be able to understand about their discount plans and their payment modes like paypal porn so that you can settle on the best plan that accepts secure payment via online platforms. I usually entrust several porn websites where all the services satisfy my needs.


Another amazing feature is the information is always updated frequently so that you can be the first one to know about new porn sites, new porn discounts and any desirable features that will keep your heads up. Expert teams of critics is always on the move to gather reliable information about premium porn websites that can make a remarkable impact in your sex life. Examination of all these websites and outline comprehensive details so that you can make a decision of joining your favorite premium porn site basing on reliable and exclusive information without having to surf for hours. This way, you can’t get ripped off of your hard earned cash as you will have a clear understanding of the sites pros and cons that can help you make a positive move.


The best porn sites reviewed


I have come across numerous premium porn sites that offer excellent porn videos, sex chats, live sex chats, live webcams, and all categories of premium porn. One of the best is their x3cams which offers numerous live webcam girls who can offer you exclusive time and make you reach orgasm in minutes and want for more. Most of the girls here are professionals, know their work and are always online to offer you maximum sexual satisfaction. You will chat with the most beautiful babes, fetish girls, ebony, Asian, Brunette, hairy pussy, group sex, all doing their favorite sex act just for you starting from oral sex, anal sex, and everything you want till you come.


Other premium porn websites reviewed include Desperate Amateurs, DDF Network,, Reality Kings, Scoreland, Team Skeet, ATK Girlfriends, Girlsway Network, DDF Busty, Downblouse Loving, Hot Legs and Feet, 1By-Day,, Blow Pass, PornDoe Premium and the list is endless for you to find that unique porn site that will arouse all your sexual sensation till you get satisfied.


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Web Cam Porn
Porn Webcam


I can tell you for sure that porn site reviews reveal you the most amazing porn sites that you have never heard of. You will find sites that provide you with exclusive full HD porn movies that you can watch for hours without getting tired. You will come across numerous porn networks that offer private sex acts and videos that can keep you hooked up for hours without getting tired at the most affordable cost. I usually take advantage of porn discounts, porn offers and any opportunity that makes me feel excited and enjoying the sex life. It’s now your turn to find everything that will bring joy and sexual fantasy to your life.


Rick is the owner of the Adultsmart, an online sex toy shop that stocks over 13,000 products. He has been involved in the adult lifestyle industry for more than 25 years. Rick is an active sex blogger who provides a wealth of information and experience. He is an advocate of equality for gender and sexuality.

Guidelines To BDSM Dating Online!

BDSM Dates Online

If you are interested in online BDSMsites dating then there are number of things you should focus beginning with posting your profile online on BDSM dating sites to the ways to deal with BDSM partner. After posting an appropriate profile on certain online BDSM dating sites like BDSMdatingonly you should also follow certain guidelines while dating with like minded people. Certain do’s and don’ts to be followed at this time may include:

Guidelines for creating your profile for BDSM dating sites

While posting your profile for online BDSM dating you will have to take care of certain things like:

Check grammar and spelling: When you are interested in BDSM relationship then it is very natural for you to write an attractive profile. But your responsibility does not end with writing a profile. If it has a number of spelling and grammar mistakes then there is no use of posting it on the BDSM dating sites as many viewers will think you are not taking it seriously. Before posting your profile on the BDSM dating site you should check its grammar and spelling so that it will not look awkward or perhaps make it unclear what you are after before you meet someone for this purpose. Posting a mistake ridden profile will show your careless attitude which will not be appreciated by others. If you are careless with your spelling and grammar people may think you are a scammer or dishonest in what you are providing or require. .

Describe yourself honestly: While describing your whereabouts in the profile you should be specific so that people can know how far they must travel. Sending a message of your suburb will allow any viewers to choose people in a certain radius from their home or workplace.  Avoid lying or over-stretching the truth on your profile as if you build yourself up to be a Barbie or Adonis, it will meet with disappointment when you actually hook-up.  Everyone has certain flaws which can make them more attractive as there is no such thing as a perfect person.   If you build your profile up too much then it may present as being strange and unrealistic to the readers.

Acknowledge Your Boundaries: While writing your profile to online BDSM dating site you should be honest about what you are into and more importantly what you are not so that you can easily find a good match. You should also be honest about describing what it is you are after in the person you are looking for  in this relationship. For instance, if you are looking for a serious BDSM relationship then you should not say that you are looking for Vanilla Sex.

Do not focus on your negative points: Usually people do not like to read negative things at least with whom they are planning to grow a kind of relationship through online BDSM dating.  Everyone understand that people have flaws physically and in character but being too honest will have people running for the hills.  For example if you have a minor mental disability it will not get too much interest to post an ad like ‘male suffering for Post Traumatic Syndrome looking for ….’  These personal flaws can be disclosed after you start dating.

Do not mention a list of your dislikes:  Everyone dislikes certain things. You can also mention the things and habits you dislike like cheating, lying and smoking etc. on your profile. But if it includes a full list of your dislikes then you profile will show you more like an unhappy and pessimistic person with whom no one will like to develop any kind of relationship including BDSM relationship.

Give your marital status only when asked: Some of the BDSM dating sites may ask you about your marriage status but you should not mention anything about your marital status and friendships as well as children unless you are asked.

Choose your BDSM profile photo carefully: You should choose a latest photo for your BDSM dating profile, even if it is photo-shopped to some extent, instead of a dated old photo or even worse a fake photograph. Your old photo (or fake one) will not provide right information about you and if you manage to find a prospect – how do you explain the difference when you meet?

Do not be personal: While sending message for BDSM dating you should respect the likes and dislikes of the other. You should not send sexual messages unless you are invited to do so otherwise, you should restrain yourself to the BDSM guidelines until you work out what will be allowed and what will not between each other.

Send a good opening message: While sending a message for online BDSM dating you should first of all try to engage your partner then gradually become more personal with them.  When sending your first message, rather than talk about yourself you should list the points that you liked in their profile. It will give a positive effect.

Do not focus only on BDSM: while making a profile for some BDSM online dating sites to attract like minded people you should not fill your content with only things related to BDSM relationship. People may avoid your profile if they cannot connect to you because they do not get a reading on your overall attitudes.

Make a thorough profile: While making your profile you should focus on providing enough information so that they can get a general idea of what makes you tick. Along with your likes and dislikes it should also include information about your attitude towards society. It should compel others to think about dating with you because of an interest to get to know you further.

Post different types of profiles: Instead of writing and posting only one profile on online BDSM dating website you should create few different types of profiles.  Provide enough information about you in each of them so that readers can know more about you – if it allows link these profiles together so that people can get a complete picture of who you are. It will provide the viewers a rounded and more attractive image about you.

Meeting BDSM Players
Getting BDSM Dates

By following these online BDSM dating guidelines one can easily develop a good and reliable relationship. Your profile for BDSM dating sites should be created carefully so that it can attract others by telling about your in a clear and precise manner.  Everyone is unique and different but you can make an attractive profile by following the do’s and don’ts provided above. Your profile also sends your message that you are open to be with like minded people.

Rick is the owner of the Adultsmart, an online sex toy shop that stocks over 13,000 products. He has been involved in the adult lifestyle industry for more than 25 years. Rick is an active sex blogger who provides a wealth of information and experience. He is an advocate of equality for gender and sexuality.