I have worked in an adult shop now for just under a year, within that time I have broken up with one partner, been single, found myself again and met someone new who is pretty damn amazing.
I am a relationship girl through and through, I do not enjoy being single, I do not enjoy meaningless connections, meaningless sex or the so-called “freedom” that comes with not being tied emotionally and physically to anyone. my sexual resume would resemble that of a student who has just left school and only had a couple of part-time jobs, but yet I found myself working in an adult shop and thus selling, recommending and purchasing adult toys. There does seem to be a lot of assumptions made of those of us who choose to work in such an industry, to me the motives behind me working in the adult industry was to bring my confidence to the surface, to be sure of myself, to be able to hold my ground, the help those who need it when it comes to happiness and give a different point of view about the more intimate side of relationships. Also, it was to challenge my interpersonal skills with an area of knowledge I only know a slim surface of.
I have met, spoken too, been introduced, read, learned, discovered a world in which men, women and anything in between chose to spice up, control, involve, discover and even replace, all ways in which we as human beings have sex and thus achieve and experience orgasms.
Don’t get me wrong I am all for sexual exploration, sexual awareness and the right to orgasm, however, I am very happy to admit sex is a lot more about connection then it is just for the physical. I have gone for months- years between relationships without having any sexual encounters with any other person because I believe in relationships. I believe in sex as expressing feelings, love, and connection in those relationships, but I also believe in not judging someone for their own decisions or own outlook on life. To me sex is always a 2-way street and not just about my own sexual gratification, to me, sex is giving your whole self to your partner, your insecurities, vulnerabilities, wants needs, passions, and desires. It’s about satisfying your partner to give them complete enjoyment as well as enjoying yourself.
The concern I notice most in-store and also within my own relationship is an almost fear of toys, I am an incredibly empathetic person, and the concerns and issues of most people resonate within me. I’ve witnessed it many times, a couple come into store mainly the boyfriends or husbands idea first then as they move further into the store they are overwhelmed by vibrators, dildos, contraptions, of everything and anything in between, and their facial expressions change. This is the point where the guy no longer feels comfortable, and the stress of intimidation overcomes their eyes in a clouded haze. On the other hand, the girlfriend or wife seems to no longer feel timid or scared and are fairly amazed at the products and their capabilities, they are inquisitive and ask a multitude of questions. As a woman I know toys don’t replace men, and if I had to choose id throw out my toys in a heartbeat if my partner was that threatened because I do think sexual satisfaction should come from your partner and not be relied upon by toys.
Controversial I know! Have you ever heard the saying –
“everything in moderation”
same rule applies to toys in the bedroom, they are an aid, not a replacement, and I believe that 100% you may be able to orgasm in under 3 minutes with your womanizer but try using it while with your partner and tell me it doesn’t increase the mood by at least 50%.
My job is to endorse orgasm, and I want everyone to be able to fulfill their needs without the fear of intimidation so to ease you and your partner into the world of toys the ones listed below are an awesome way to bring yourselves into toy play without hurting anyone’s feelings.
Remeber you’re trying to spice things up, not replace anyone!
my top picks for nonintimidating toys to bring a little extra spark to your already incredible sex life are:
vibrating eggs: these little eggs are gold mines, small and discrete and your partner can control them with remote your phone! there are so many possibilities with these all you need is your imagination,
cock rings: small, simple, sleek multiple possibilities and advantages and amazing for both partners.
Lube: who can forget lube, its sensual, slippery, tantalizing, and its uses are endless, not to mention it also helps women to orgasm easier.
what are you waiting for, try one!
Although relatively young Morgan has lived a life filled with experiences that have made her grow as a person. She has completed and is a product and interior designer who is a strong believer in equality between sexes and speaks out against violence. Working in the adult industry has allowed her to grow as a person and come out of her emotional and sexual shell.