Water Bottle Douching Techniques!

A heat wave had struck the city. Down in the streets below, t-shirts clung to the backs of the people passing by, an old man stood by a telephone booth fanning himself with a newspaper and a car honked as it almost slammed into an unruly cyclist trying to escape the heat.

Upstairs a barrage of deep tonal beats played throughout the air and an alarm sound resounded deep within the store; a young man with short cropped black hair, baggy jean shorts and a white singlet walked through the door.

He seemed very calm, serene like a drop of water dissipating deep within an ivory well. Beneath the surface there was curiosity, tumultously crashing over a perspicacious disposition. I approached him and asked if there was anything specific he was looking for, to which he replied; “Yeah mate, I need a douche you got one of ‘em?”

“Yes, right this way”, I mandated demurely. As I lead him to our douche stand, I pondered the intricacies of the young man’s situation. “Is this douche for yourself?” I asked him.

“Aw yeah mate, yeah I’m a bottom and I’ve got a partner like, he’s a top and so what that means in the gay community, like, is that during anal play, the top is usually the giver, and the bottom is the receiver so-to-speak. D’you know what I mean?”

“Yes, absolutely. And before any session of hot anal play it can be an absolute necessity to douche, to make sure that the sex is hygienic and that all flows smoothly and according to plan.” I replied.

“Too right, mate”, he grinned. “Poop and sex don’t mix for me, but hey, I don’t judge.”

“I’m glad you don’t judge, as this is a judgement free zone, as well as an Oh-zone.” I chided and we laughed boisterously.

I bent down to pick up some of the latest douches we had in store, packaged in clean, crisp white boxes with smooth designs and grooves. “Here we have the Adam & Eve EZ Anal Douche. It has a typical Anal Douche design, a bulbous lower section and a tube attached to the top with a fine nozzle. I believe it’s a 0.5” flexible and detachable plastic tip so you can remove it when you’re sucking water into the lower body of the douche, and reattach it when you need to insert the nozzle into your ass.”

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“Well, mate, the problem is I’m on the dole and I can’t afford to spend all my dollarydoos on a douche, like, I’ve got maybe 20 bucks to spend.” He said, scratching his chin.

“Ah”, I sighed. “When they say you pay for quality, and what you get is what you pay for, they couldn’t be closer to the truth. You could spend a decent $45 on this douche, have the maximum comfort possible for an otherwise discomfortable task or you could do what some of my friends have done in the past – And I really shouldn’t be telling you this – But in an emergency, a plastic water bottle works adequately as a douche. You’d fill up the bottle with water, place the bottle neck to your anus and …” I trailed off.

He winced sympathetically at the idea of placing a ridged bottle neck in or near a sensitive area like his anus. “Mate, y’ave convinced me, I’m gonna buy that douche but ya owe me a VB for what I’m dishing out.”

“I can’t promise anything, but I can promise that you’ll love this Adam and Eve EZ Anal Douche, and your partner will love you even more for it.” I winked. He laughed and as I packed away his douche for him, a soft fog rolled in from downstairs, lazily creeping up the stairs, signaling that night had arrived and the heat of the day had passed.

He waved goodbye to me and as the alarm sounded to signify his leaving, the deep tonal beats within the shop changed to a soft tempo jazz, saxophones blaring into the foggy ambience. I wiped clean the counter in front of me, slowly, precisely and the soft warbling of siren-song from the speakers shrouded me, superfluous and subdued.

About the author: Isaac is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres

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