Is Female Masturbation Normal?

Bettina DiCapri with Dildo Photo

Saucing the Taco, Tripping The Switch, Finger Painting, Diddling The Skittle, Polishing The Pearl…I never knew female masturbation had so many different terms (some less graceful than others I must say). In this post I will be discussing the mysterious act that is self pleasuring with the hope that I may shine light on a usually taboo and rarely discussed topic. I am a passionate advocate of women reclaiming their pleasure and power, and I feel that in order to be empowered with one’s sexuality, young women need to be informed about ways to claim their sexuality as their own. From this empowered place, healthy choices regarding sexual relationships can be made. Call it wishful thinking but my hope is  that one day, (sooner rather than later) having a normal and open conversation about female masturbation is commonplace, and with this, the shame and guilt associated with masturbation can be eradicated.

I have a brief recollection of the sex education I received in high school and it basically consisted of how sex can lead to pregnancy and/or  sexually transmitted diseases and that men sometimes masturbate and may experience wet dreams. Not once did I hear anyone discuss female masturbation. My parents did not discuss the topic either and I don’t know how well that would have been received if they had tried. The information I  read about masturbation was through a popular teen magazine, where young girls would write in and claim something along the lines of how mortified they were  trying it or how they had injured themselves using pens or other foreign objects. Ouch!!!!  I had an innocent curiosity as to what all the fuss was about so gave it a try one night. The best feeling I had ever experienced in my life was quickly followed by immense shame and guilt. I felt  dirty and disgusting as if there was something wrong with exploring my body. The desire to experience solo sexual pleasure exceeded the associated negative emotions, however looking back I am upset that I had to experience shame and guilt following self pleasuring in the first place.

Curiosity led me to research whether I was in a minority group that did not receive education regarding masturbation and so I had thought, it is not taught or discussed in the Australian education system. In fact it seems that the negative emphasis on sex and sexuality is the norm with sex education. A study completed by La Trobe University in 2011 indicated that “The pleasure of sexual behaviour/activity” was taught by less than 50% of teachers completing sex education in secondary schools. “This suggests that Australian Sex Education programs focus more strongly on negative outcomes of sexual behaviour.” A complete lack of emphasis on the pleasurable and positive aspects of sexual experiences only adds to the belief that sexuality is a negative and shameful part of oneself.

 

Female Masturbation Facts and Statistics History Image
Image: Is Female Masturbation Normal?

 

It is well documented that masturbation is a safe and healthy practice for all women, whether in a relationship or not. Some of the benefits include:

Physical Benefits

  • Female masturbation helps prevent cervical infections and relieves urinary tract infections.
  • Masturbation is associated with improved cardiovascular health and lower risk of type-2 diabetes.
  • Masturbation can help prevent insomnia naturally through hormonal and tension release
  • Orgasm increases pelvic floor strength.

Psychological and Emotional Benefits

  • Improves your mood.
  • Relieves stress.
  • Strengthens your relationship with yourself and your body
  • Strengthens sexual relationship with your partner
  • Helpful in treating sexual dysfunctions for couples.
  • Can be helpful in creating positive views and beliefs regarding sex and sexuality in individuals

Masturbation is so important for women to experience, not only for the many health benefits listed above but also so that the reliance on someone else to fulfill their sexual desires is minimised. With this, empowered choices regarding who to engage sexually with can be made. I also believe that in order to  communicate effectively to a sexual partner about what you desire and what feels good to your body, it is important to know yourself what your body likes and doesn’t.

There are countless ways for women to approach masturbation, and could involve using hands, toys and/or vibrators. The wonderful staff at the Oh Zone Stores are very knowledgeable with all the latest products and gadgets that can lead to more pleasurable and exciting experiences solo or with a partner. My personal favourite brands we have in stores and online include Je Joue, Fun Factory and Rianne S. Their products are all excellent quality and come in such unique functions and designs suited to every body.

Every woman is different and what feels amazing to one person could be unpleasant for the next. I recommend approaching masturbation with a great sense of curiosity and erotic exploration…it’s amazing to get to know your body and to discover the pleasure you’re capable of experiencing.

I hope I have highlighted plenty of reasons  why “entering the mosque”  is an extremely healthy and enjoyable experience for women…get to it ladies!!

 

Author: Stephanie Curtis- BA Nursing

Save

What Does An Anal Orgasm Feel Like?

Woman Aroused

We’re accountable for our sexuality, and we should own it. Even with the clothes we wear or lingerie we express ourselves sexually. I cherish anal (and am disgusted by oral), so I’m truly peculiar, yet so what? I have somebody who admires me for me. I initially attempted anal 10 years back, with my spouse. I’d had dreams about it for some time, and was more into doing it. I anticipated that I’d like it as much as I eventually do. We had attempted butt play first using fingers, and I loved it. I don’t discuss it with my social network much, on the grounds that there’s a shame factory against ladies who appreciate female anal orgasm. It is possible that they are labelled as slut or dirty, or they’re lying for male acceptance. Neither one of those is valid for me.

I never was truly apprehensive about trying it and did not have the fear many people have about anal.

At any rate, the first occasion we tried it he was ,more worried that it was going to hurt me than I was. I let him know we’d attempt and  if it hurt, I’d tell him to stop. The first run through, and all ensuing times, it just felt unbelievable to me. Astonishing, exceptional and pleasurable. It gives me amazing orgasms unlike any that I have experienced having vaginal sex. It is almost like my G-spot is in my ass. I can always orgasm with just anal penetration, however now and again I get the two-fold blended female orgasm when we include toys and stimulate my clit.

Initially one and then the other blended into unbelievable orgasms. Damn, that is something. I figure I come effectively. My sexual steps incorporate first having vaginal sex without an orgasm, some teasing or finger/toy play, and then to  anal sex. I must be extremely turned on to have an orgasm from anal. On the rare occasion I suffer a little discomfort when a finger or penis penetrates my ass but this just means that there has not been enough foreplay and within minutes I have loosened up and there is only joy. I would love to do it more often but because of the amount of foreplay involved for me to relax it is generally between 1-2 times per month.  Certainly it would be more but being time poor and having a family sometimes there is just not enough time.

Womens Bottom Blue Yellow

If you don’t care for a finger in your rear end or prostate massager, you probably won’t care for anal sex. If that a little dildo doesn’t feel great, simply don’t even attempt anal as if you are not relaxed with a toy or finger you certainly will not enjoy a thrusting penis. Truly, that is OK!   If it doesn’t feel great, don’t do it.  Why do something you do not enjoy.

Maybe try another time and give anal a second chance  just in case it was because because you were uptight the first time, remember it is all about relaxing – if you tighten up you will not enjoy it.  That ought to be the first observation of all sex: Do what feels great. If it doesn’t feel great, don’t do that! Not for anybody or for any reason.

I’ve only had anal sex wtht with my spouse, and we’d been married for quite a few years before we attempted – so were both comfortable with each other and sex.  We discussed it before-hand and I would say that I would not have any desire to attempt it with somebody I didn’t totally trust. If you instruct them to stop, and they don’t, you could injure yourself or tear something.

Even though now we are comfortable doing anal together and sometimes it is even spontaneous we communicated a great deal before we tried it the first time.  And when trying it for the first time I was very vocal in telling him what was comfortable and what was not.  How deep to go in, the speed and strength of the thrusts.  We were lucky and I enjoyed it from the first time and his penis size was perfect for me – however you must take into consideration your partners penis size as well.

Use lots of lube. As much as you think you need and after that even more. I just like water-based brands despite the fact that I am told silicone ones now are accessible particularly for anal sex that do not get absorbed by the anus so last longer. I also spread a towel on the bed so there are no lubricant stains and even though we have been married for a long time, most times I get him to wear a condom so there is no chance of him getting an infection.   We have been lucky and never has any accidents but if we did the condom would also stop any poop going onto his penis or into his urethra.

Here’s the greatest, most valuable guidance: Go moderately. It’’s best if the lady can specifically do the pushing from the spoon position backing up onto the erect penis. Also lady on top, dropping down works just as well.  Something else that works pleasantly is lying on the side of the bed, ass propped up on a cushion. At that point you can lift your legs over his shoulders. Make it truly attractive by having him go excruciatingly slowly as he enters you. Like centimeter by centimeter.

The more into it you are before you attempt it, the more probable you are to orgasm amid — much the same as vaginal sex. So once you know you like and are turned on already by anal sex rather than doing it just because your partner wants you too. That is the biggest reason for ladies abhorring anal sex:

“They’re doing it for the wrong reasons.”

What does anal sex feels like?

More ladies are having butt sex and why it associates to more and higher intensity female orgasms. Since 1992, the rate of ladies 20-24 years of age who say they’ve attempted butt sex has multiplied to 40 percent. The rate of ladies 20-39 years of age who say they’ve had it the previous year has multiplied to more than 20 percent. Also, 94 percent of ladies who indulged in anal sex toys in their last experience said they came to climax a higher and more of them was accounted for by ladies who had vaginal intercourse or oral sex.

It now appears that with anal sex by all accounts there are ladies who love it more and will orgasm more than with traditional sex methods. These ladies are insisting that they’re into it for their own particular delight as opposed to what their partner wants. What’s more, they aren’t the only one. Set out below are numerous true posts from women describing why they like anal sex and achieve anal orgasm:

 

Hand Clenching

Recently the adult smart community blog sent out an invitation for ladies that have tried anal sex and have an anal orgasm to share how it made them feel.  Set out below are some real life anal sex stories –

‘I feel vulnerable, as if I am inviting someone into a taboo space. Partners in a sexual secret. Everything about this anal orgasm pushes your limits. It feels naughty which boosts arousal an makes the whole experience surreal.’

‘Ass play orgasms are the most highly connected with fantasy and are the most intimate and are the epitome of arousal. It is not where you start. You need to be ready to pop. Happen when I am at my highest level of arousal. They are the most satisfying and convulsive by far.’

‘The only way I can have an anal orgasm is with a very gentle entry of a strap on dildo and, once in and relaxed, I want it hard and fast. With very hard, very fast thrusting I can have a massive, body-convulsing orgasm. I need a trustworthy partner and this type of stimulation is so intense that it can’t last too long.’

‘My ex and I used to play that way a lot and I can say the more lube the better. An anal orgasm is awesome. We had a lot of toys but my favorite thing was her to rim me then use her fingers.’

‘Women that say it hurts aren’t taking the time to concentrate on relaxing their sphincter muscle properly. if you have a patient man that will not just ram it in and take the time to lube you and him up properly while stimulating her vagina and anus before insertion. Most anal sex problems fall on the female’s phobia/stress of doing it, if this is done properly size will not matter and will be pleasurable for both parties. Once that happens the anus will be more accepting of the penis next time.’

‘It doesn’t hurt if the guy knows what he is doing and does a lot of research beforehand. My boyfriend and I researched it for at least a few months before we did it.Use lots and lots of lube, I would even recommend using special anal penetration lube the first few times. The best kind are the ones that numb that area just a little bit, so it isn’t so painful. Another good tip, is not to just sit there in fear of what is happening.. Try using a small vibrator on your clitoris to keep your mind off of it. It helps.’

‘Yes, you will possibly be aware or scared because you haven’t try it yet. Some says that When you first had anal sex it hurt a lot and you will cry a little, but if you never stopped from trying it again. You will have had the most fantastic orgasms in your life.’

‘My advice, try it once, then you will know if you like it or not. Only try it within a trusting relationship, use lots of lube, buy the lube from Gay websites, it’s designed for that, do not make anal sex the norm, as it will hurt if you have anal sex 2/3 times a fortnight. Just be open and say no when you want to, but give it a go at least once.’

Hopefully this will give an indication to you of what female anal orgasms are all about and whether you want to try to experience one.

Save