14 Secrets Behind Why Guy’s Buy You Drinks

A guy buying drinks

Is it a thoughtful gesture or a golden ticket to his bed?

The age old question is:

“What does it mean when a guy buys you a drink in a bar?”

I have always wondered what the exact motive is other than the standard answer of “being a gentleman” because we all know most have a hidden agenda, there is however always an exception to the rule, but mostly just the rule.

Basically to put it bluntly any man who is offering to buy you a drink or actually is buying you a drink wants something. That something depends on the guy and the situation but by accepting that drink you are unofficially accepting the idea of entering into his request. Now that request could be a general conversation, or it could be that golden ticket to take you home.  Nothing in life is free, and expectations are always bought up in one way or another.

From working in a bar, and being in that “bar lifestyle” I have been witness to many amusing events as to reactions and end results of guys buying girls drinks.

And let me tell you there is no age limit on this…

From the information I have researched and also from what I have asked my male friends the agenda seems to be indirectly the same. Maybe this is because unlike men, women read deeply into things, and over think situations and it’s not always, as it seems.

Most guys first response when you ask is usually just for conversation or to be a nice guy, but is that just what you want to hear or what they actually want?

Being a female myself I have been witness too and experienced myself the magnitude in which guys offer to buy drinks for girls. I have never entered into this maybe because of all that I have witnessed or maybe because I wasn’t interested in what they were offering, who knows. What I do know is that I have in fact bought guys drinks if they promise to leave me alone for the rest of the night… it works mostly…

So here we get down to the nitty gritty, if one drink means one conversation what does two drinks mean? And so on? When you allow a guy to buy you a drink the polite thing to do is to let them speak to you and have a general conversation while drinking said drink. If you are “one of those girls” you will take the drink off the bar as soon as it’s placed and disappear like a ninja with drink in hand! You then spend the rest of the night ducking from the poor lost soul who purchased that drink for you.

Homer Simpson going into a bush
Image: Simpson Meme

If a man buys you a second drink, you are basically telling him you enjoy his company enough to stick around for another in-depth chat but when does this turn in to a golden ticket to his bed? This debate is never ending and I guess it depends on the person and how much “liquid courage” has been consumed from both parties prior to this investment.

Because men and women are made different there is some obvious differences in thoughts as to what buying a drink means. One blogger by the name of Big_Knows_Best surveyed 20 guys in a local bar and documented their responses, the responses are beyond hilarious.

From the start of the night to the end there is a major shift in responses for added humour she has also added in her own commentary.

Here are a few just for your enjoyment:

“Conversation”

This was the most common answer at the beginning of the night. Cool, man. You’re a great guy or whatever. Boring. I’ll check back with you after a few more shots. Maybe he will use a pick-up line that will work!

“Sex”

Really? For just one drink? I guess this works on the girls whose drinks aren’t usually purchased for them. Best of luck in your safari for girls with low self-esteem, sir.

Conversation that will lead to sex

Now, we are getting somewhere.

“When you buy a shot, you’re trying to close the deal. If you buy a beer you’re just trying to extend the conversation”

A method. I like it

“One drink? Conversation. Two? Get a little personal. Three? I better be walking out the door with you”

Basic concept of investment and return. I see you. What about four?

“One drink, like 5 minutes of your time. Two drinks, front door. Three drinks, back door”

Well, that escalated quickly.

“For her to drink it”

*Eye roll* You’re useless.

“At least a dance floor make out and finger bang”

Oh yeah, at LEAST a public finger bang. I see how a $3 beverage warrants that.

“I’ll buy you a drink and show you!”

Clever, Casanova.

But seriously what does it mean! I have a few options for you:

  1. He thinks you can’t afford your own drink, so he wants to be nice! It’s an expensive world out there!
  2. He wants to show you he is a nice guy, and maybe strike up a conversation with you.
  3. He is letting you know he is interested!
  4. He thinks you’re stunning! And he is just showing you some appreciation.
  5. He is hoping you will go home with him to privately show off your sexy lingerie that’s underneath! Well hello mister sleazy!

Now apart from accepting the drink there is also another side to this!

What do you do when you don’t want the drink? Awkward!

Tv Show Drinking Meme
Image: Funny Drink Meme

This is a completely viable option; I found most guys don’t take “No thank you” as an option so I had to get a little creative. Buying that guy a drink instead and asking him to promise to leave you alone for the rest of the night usually works. Not because he took the bribe, but because you basically embarrassed him and his masculinity – you know these days you have just to keep them on their toes!

But no joke it’s easy! By saying no thank you, or something along the lines of “I have already had enough tonight, but thanks” or “I already have a drink, but thanks” work perfectly fine too.

On a safety note as a general rule you shouldn’t really accept drinks from strangers, basically from a young age we are taught to not take candy from a stranger… I feel the same rule applies!

Happy drinking!

Morgan x

Author: Morgan is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres

 

 

 

 

20 Dating Tricks You Wish You Knew

Dating troubles

Whether you are new to the dating world or hopping back into the dating pool for the…? time, the water is always cold and cloudy to start with. It takes a bit of time to find your feet but sure enough before long you’ll be off and running.

It doesn’t matter if the date is with someone you’ve met online that you have been chatting with for months or a blind date set up by a mutual friend. Going on dates can be a tad overwhelming. The whole premise of dating is to be vulnerable and let someone get close to you, this alone is enough to make someone apprehensive for whatever reason. On top of the emotional factors, there is always physical risks and I’m not just referring to a potential assault; but also transportation etc.

Over the years from personal experience as well as countless hours being a shoulder for “girl” friends, mates or the random drunk crying person at the end of a night out. Through all of these experience and conversations, I have compiled a few tips that I think can help to make the dating experience smarter and safer.

These tips are in no particular order and should be taken at face value. These have worked for me and for others, please use them as you will, change and adapt as you go. No two people go through the dating world on the same path. Find out what works for you and don’t be ashamed of it.

I hope you find some use in the tips below, just remember to date safe and smart!

1. There’s more to life and happiness than a relationship!

It’s great to want a relationship but obsession is not a good look on anyone.

2. You gotta like single you!

If you’re unhappy with yourself and your lifestyle, how is someone else supposed to want to spend time with you, little own make you feel better about yourself?

3. Date yourself a bit!

If the whole idea of planning a date seems overwhelming, take yourself out a few times before jumping into the dating pool. Find out what you like to do, know your limits.

4. Dating isn’t about proving your worth to someone! (You already are worth it!)

It’s about finding someone you can be comfortably yourself with. Someone you can spend ridiculous amounts of time with doing NOTHING!

5. Stop worrying about being “rejected” for being “too fat”, “too short” or whatever!

You may have had to reject them later on for having not seen Pretty Woman or the Latest DC movie. Everyone has their own “fit” of personality traits in a relationship they would like their lover to have.

6. When someone says “I’m too damaged” or “I have too much baggage”, believe them!

Forget low self-esteem and self-deprecation. This person does not need you to pick them up and put their pieces back together.

7. First dates are not interviews for marriage (Save that till you meet their mother)

While first impressions count for a lot, give these things time, that’s what getting to know someone is about.

8. Make the first few dates public and use separate transportation.

This reassures a sense of independence and safety for both parties.

9. Turn off your phone!

How do you expect to open up to someone or for someone to open up to you when there is a glowing screen between you?

Man waiting for his date
Image: Waiting For Date

10. Avoid the “ex” conversations.

An ex is in the past, leave it there.

11. Action dates are best to start with!

Most people already sit at a desk from 9-5, try planning dates that get you up and out. Move around and try different things. This is a sure way to instigate good conversation.

12. Don’t be afraid to google!

It’s 2017 almost 2018… if you’re about to go on a date with someone you’ve never met and share no mutual contacts… try giving them a google search, it might save yourself an awkward bombshell.

13. Limit the boozy beverages.

One before to calm the nerves, one to start the meal and get the conversation going… And see how you feel from there. You should always be in complete control of yourself.

14. Eye gazing tells you a lot.

Researchers have found that when someone is romantically “into” another person their gaze tends to land on and around the face. When the feelings are more sexual their eyes wander around the other person’s body.

15. $20

Always have $20 tucked away. $20 may not get you home, but it will get you $20 closer to home!

16. Say what you mean and mean what you say!

Don’t say you’re going to call unless you really intend to call!

17. Don’t be afraid of the second date!

Unless the first date was a nightmare give the second one a go, perhaps you’ll both be more like yourselves?

18. Consider pulling someone out of the “Friend Zone”.

Friends are friends, but perhaps there is a certain person you just haven’t looked at in the right light. I mean they’re in your life for a reason?

19. No guilt for moving on!

If you don’t feel any sort of something from date one 2 or even 12, know it’s ok to move on. Not everyone is going to be a fit.

20. No games!

Forget the 3 days or 48 hours no call rules or whatever you’ve heard. Be yourself, call or text when YOU feel appropriate. (Just remember obsession doesn’t look good on anyone!). Unless they are adult games you would like to play!

Author: Patrick Kriz- BA Psychology Human Sexuality