It’s All About The BDSM Collars

bdsm collar

With the rise in popularity in BDSM and wearable kink gear let’s talk about collars.

 

Collars are used for a variety of reasons in BDSM and play and it’s important to know the different meanings surrounding them. It is not unusual to pass a coworker who is wearing a subtle and discreet collar everyday and you might never know.

 

Collars aren’t exclusively used as a form of restraint, punishment or degradation.

 

Collars of consideration:

 

Often used for new relationships, a form of ownership, think of it like a stepping stone to a permanent collar between a dom/sub, master/slave etc. The training collar is as much for both parties to decide if this is the dynamic that they would each like to pursue.

 

Training Collar:

 

These collars are worn when in a dynamic when a sub or slave is being trained in the dynamic, whilst still a form and a sign of ownership and is up to the Dom/Master when the training is complete.

 

Protection Collar

 

A collar in any variant is a form of protection. A collared person is under protection of someone and etiquette should be followed accordingly. This affords the wearer the ability to be left alone by single dominants unless they have the permission of the collar’s owner to approach. This is a responsibility of the dominant or whoever is in charge of the collar is significant and should also not be taken lightly. We will go into this further down.

 

Play Collars

 

There are two ways that a play collar can be used.In terms of dynamic, this is the most relaxed form of dynamic collars, but still not simply a collar for being restrained. Play collars are collars where dynamics are enforced and utilised during kinky scenes as soon as the collar is placed around the submissive’s neck.They are helpful to prepare the mindset for the scene that is about to come. When the collar is on, the wearer is the submissive, they are in the space of a submissive and respond to the person who placed it on them as such and respect them accordingly. At the end of the play session, which doesn’t necessarily need to be sexual, and the collar comes off, this is the sign that the dynamic has finished and the rules that applied for while the collar was on, are now complete. This form of training, or boundaries can be good for people who need that added guidance, comfort, or security. Lt me circle back for a second in case anyone was confused when I said play didn’t need to be sexual. Play with a collar could be anything from sex, to impact, or or service such as waiting on a person, bringing them food or acts of service. But even, play could be going out on a date and following certain protocols and rules. The limits are endless. It is whatever you and your play partner design, but they are your rules.

 

Other play collars are actual “play” collars. The type that are used during play for playful reasons, for restraint, for tying up and leading around, for degradation and submission or pet play. These can cross over into any of the other types of collar wearing and sometimes also be a stand alone. You can like being choked or led around on a collar without being a submissive.

 

24/7 collars

 

This brings me to our permanent collars. Our 24/7 collars that are worn all of the time. These are special collars indeed and can carry many different meanings to individual dynamics. For some, a permanent collar is the equivalent of an engagement ring or a wedding ring. For some, it is ownership. What it boils down to, is that it is a promise between two people that they take each other to be trusting of each other as a Dominant and a submissive and to respect each other as thus and to follow the rules of their relationship. Again, whatever that entails depending on their unique relationship.

Some dynamics might have contracts written up. Some may have collaring ceremonies and invite friends and family to witness placing the collar around the submissive’s neck. A permanent collar cannot be placed without both parties deciding and agreeing to it.

Because these collars are permanent, and never come off there are many different alternatives that people can pick these days. Nowadays many people choose to wear collars that appear closer to necklaces so that they are able to wear them to the office or out in public daily without being noticed. Some opt for the eternity collars that are fastened with an allen key. Others can get subtle BDSM collars custom fit to enjoy the best of both worlds.

 

Collar etiquette.

 

A few things to know about someone’s collar.

It is very disrespectful to touch a person’s collar without first gaining permission, and even then only if necessary.

If a person is collared it is always wise to speak to their “Dominant first” as a show of respect.

A person wearing a collar should not remove their collar without asking their “Dominant” first.

Wearing collars can also be very fashionable, so we understand that it may be hard to know if someone is wearing one as a fashion choice or a protocol, if in doubt, ask them, or someone at the event. If the person who is wearing it doesn’t answer, that’s ok, they might not be allowed to answer. Please do not think they are being rude and press them. Move on. If their Dominant approaches, apologise and explain. But we always suggest, asking the organiser of the event first when in doubt. They will be able to vet the situation better for you.

 

Collars are a beautiful and fun way to share connections and feelings within the BDSM scene. Collared individuals feel quite proud to be owned/collared by their dominants and see it as praise and an honour to be asked about their collars.

 

At Your Service,

 

Tiffany

OhZone  Adult Shop Sales Assistant, Educator and Proudly Collared.

The Psychology Behind Human Puppy Play

human puppy play

Puppy play is a sexual practice where human participants take on the role of dogs. Generally, this activity seeks the achievement of sexual satisfaction through submissive/dominant interactions, where an adult adopts the behavior and appearance of a pup and the second adult takes on the persona of a dominant master. While the activity is most specifically referred to a type of a sex game within a couple, there are also group activities with the participation of more pups and a handler, a single pup and multiple handlers, or just a pack of dogs. The practice evolved over the time from an intimate role play between two people to a community phenomenon that is said to foster social interaction and help people relax by escaping the daily responsibility of adult life. In some cases, puppy play does not involve any sexual activity.

What motivates people to engage in puppy play?

People engage in puppy play for several reasons. Studies conducted on puppy play enthusiasts revealed 5 aspects that motivate humans to participate in such an activity. These aspects include:

1. Sexual pleasure

Many people engage in puppy play for receiving sexual pleasure. While some participants associate puppy play with a prelude before physical intercourse, other consider it a direct source of sexual pleasure. The sexual pleasure is generated by the dominant or submissive role that the participant takes on during the scene. For pups, being physically and emotionally obedient to a powerful handler can stimulate their sexual desire and make them feel wanted.

From the handler’s point of view, the fact of gaining full control over the body of the submissive element can be a determinant source of sexual arousal. Being on four legs, the pup exposes intimate parts that facilitate the development of a dominant sexuality for the handler. It can be the exposure of genitals that works as an invitation to the master to begin penetration. To increase the submissive sexuality and make the handler more aroused, many participants use plug-ins and other insertion devices along with straps around the waist and neck.

2. Relaxation

For many participants, puppy play is a source of relaxation. They deem this practice an efficient way to escape the daily responsibilities of adult life. By taking the role of a pup, people escape the adult inside them that comes along with stress and strains at work and personal life, and adopt instead a sort of childish exuberance where they are not burdened with duties and are free to do anything they want without being judged for doing something inappropriate for adults.

3. Playful physicality

Puppy play is not only a psychological element, but it also has to do with fighting your body inhibitions. The participants can engage in puppy-like activities that help them escape their own body and get a better sense of their physical appearance. Running on four legs around the house, rolling the ball with the nose, jumping for joy, spinning crazily in circles and playing rough with other pups as well as other playful activities allow you escape to another setting where, you do not have to behave in a way that it is socially acceptable for an adult.

4. Expressing self-hood

Another factor that motivates people to engage in puppy play is getting a better understanding of who they are and working on developing new personality traits. By playing dumb as a dog, people can see how far they can reach while escaping the boundaries of socially acceptable behavior, testing, in a way, their ability to do crazy stuff. For shy and reserved participants, this practice gives them the chance to learn being more confident and bold in their actions.

Those that take on the role of handler can develop their ability of taking care of others and being responsible for someone’s safety, as they have to keep an eye out for the pups, feed them, rub them and so on. This is especially recommended for selfish people who want to stop being so self-centered.

5. Promoting social interaction

Puppy play helps also create a sense of community, by providing positive interactions between participants. Joyful group activities with the ball and other toys as well as rough-and-tumble play with other dogs allow create strong friendship ties that will be later applied in real life after the scene is over.

The Ultimate Guide to Sensual Domination

sensual bdsm

If you’re like most people with a profile on a BDSM dating site, you probably find domination both intimidating and exciting, but when you really think about it, domination doesn’t have to be scary at all. It can be pain-free and pleasurable in more ways than you can possibly imagine if you and your partner are on the same page when it comes to experimenting in the bedroom. If whips and chains don’t do it for you, there is still one form of domination that you can practice to give your man an orgasm to remember without leaving your comfort zone, and that is sensual domination.

Sensual Domination Uncovered

Sensual domination focuses on pleasure and sensation rather than pain and punishment, and you can practice it if you’re interested in introducing some BDSM into your sex life or to break up a more hardcore session with your partner. Although sensual domination is a form of power exchange, it focuses on all the senses for full-blown arousal that ends in toe-curling orgasms.

Keep the Props Simple

In sensual domination, you take charge over your partner by using blindfolds, light bondage gear, ice cubes, fur, lingerie, and costumes. You can use an actual blindfold or you can roll up a t-shirt and put it over your partner’s eyes so he has no idea which part of his body you’re about to touch next. Rolled-up t-shirts can also be used to tie him up to the bedpost or you can invest in fur-lined cuffs to make the scene just a touch more sensual. Put an ice cube in your mouth and rub it against his skin, especially focusing on his nipples and genitals as the most receptive areas. Use fur to create a super soft sensation, and stimulate your man visually by dressing up in the sexiest lingerie or costumes that you can find.

Plan your scene in advance, and have all the items handy. If you plan to use cuffs, have an extra set of keys at hand just to be safe. Speaking of safety, you and your partner should have a safe word in case one of you gets uncomfortable. Using traffic lights or green, yellow, and red to mean ‘go’, ‘caution’, and ‘stop’ is a good idea, even if you don’t think you’ll be stepping into the danger zone where a safe word is required. It’s better to have one and not use it than to need one but not have it.

Pleasing Your Partner Senseless

Essentially, your role as the dominant partner is to use sensual domination and give pleasure to your submissive. You need to figure out what your partner wants and provide that, and you’ll actually discover how powerful and arousing it is to hold someone’s pleasure in your hands. Sensual domination is far more romantic than other forms of BDSM, and it can strengthen the bond between two people. Like other BDSM activities, sensual domination requires you to communicate your desires openly and focus on your partner’s needs, which can lead to a more fulfilling relationship altogether.

If sensual domination alone turns out to be too vanilla for you, you can pair pain and pleasure, and see how your partner reacts. As your partner is nearing an orgasm you can bite or pinch him to up the ante as he’ll have a much higher tolerance to pain. Also, keep in mind you should do some aftercare to remain grounded and check up on your partner to make sure you didn’t misinterpret some of his signals. He may not look physically or emotionally tired but a gentle hug or merely asking him what he thought is a good idea.

Switching Your Roles

When it comes to kink, some people like to stick to their role and always be either on the dominant side of things or on the submissive. Others don’t mind switching their roles and sometimes letting their partners dominate them while at other times they take full control over the situation. Such people are called switches and they know the perks of either side of the sensual domination coin. Switching up your roles can be incredibly exciting if you let your partner surprise you with what he’s come up or if you sneak up on him with a scene you’ve spent weeks planning.

Sensual domination can be a mind-blowing activity if you want to impress your new crush, get into dominance and submission with your long-term partner by using something less intense than full-blown BDSM, or it can be used as a striking power exchange between two people looking to have some fun. Whatever your personal reasons to try it, if you do it right chances are you’ll get your partner addicted to you sexually, plus you’ll never go back to having regular sex again!

For the best range of BDSM gear for sensual domination visit the Adult LIfestyle Center at Kogarah with the largest range of Bondage and Fetish gear in on location, Australia.

Introduction Wearing Bondage Gear

Plsu Size Bondage

Bondage was considered taboo a few years ago by mainstream society and was considered an act only for a limited number of bondage enthusiasts. Fetish on the other hand was something that was visible for many years in special events such as the Halloween and gay pride parades or fetish night clubs. There are thousands of people every day out there who like to use leather gear, wear clothing made of latex and use rubber clothing (rubberists). This can be considered a fashion but also an alternative lifestyle. What attracts them to bondage gear or fetish wear it is still not clear. Is the smell of the leather or the touch of latex? Could it be something that restraints a part of their body or is it something only in their mind?

BDSM Australia Bondage Restraints
How To Use Restraints BDSM Australia

Personally I believe it’s a combination of the above and more. Many people think leather is a symbol of dominance while others prefer fetish wear as a symbol their unique style.  So what do most people choose to wear? Dominants seem to prefer fetish wear such as latex body suits or tight black corsets. Most of the times dominants will not expose themselves too much with their fetish wear. They let the submissive imagination play its role. Dominants also like to use a lot of bondage gear such as restraints, hand cuffs, rope and other things. Usually they like to wear boots made of latex especially in sessions where the submissive get a turn on by the look of the shoes. Red and Black seem to be the ultimate colors in bondage play.

Another fetish wear that is favored by dominants is the corset. It seems that the look of a dominant wearing a corset with exposed breast and nipples is a huge turn one. There is something alluring to their waste that looks like a tall appealing glass. Fetish wear like rubber outfits when combined with bondage gear such as harnesses, play a key role on the feeling of being bound. A submissive encased in rubber will feel as restricted as it feels when he is tied up in a rope. This visual effect is also appealing to the dominant.

The only thing for sure is that bondage gear and fetish wear stimulates all the senses and make intimate sex a lot more appealing and erotic for the people who take part in it. Gay men especially choose harnesses as a favourite form of dress especially in those bear and leather bars. This bondage gear lets the submissive to be more open and sexy in a ‘dressed’ kind of way leaving most of the visual effect to imagination. The favorite harnesses are made out of rope or leather. They are wrapped and tone the curves of the submissive partner’s body. The smell of the leather restraints will turn on both of them and drive them crazy. The dominant will control the submissive partner and they will travel in fantasies of sexual eroticism and ultimate orgasm that only they know.

So now that you’re prepared to investigate a touch of S&M and subjugation in the bedroom, you have to stack up on fun and unusual toys. In case you’re unfamiliar to every one of this, begin with whips, vaginal balls, textured binds or rope, a blindfold and a tickler. Starting with lighter, fun loving toys empowers you and your lover to familiarize yourselves to them in the room and afterward proceed onward to more genuine bondage devices for you to choose. Simply explore different avenues regarding tying each other up and discovering your individual solace levels. Make sure you like being tied up or doing so could be overwhelming. What’s more, make sure to convey all that you are feeling and considering.

Not many people would surmise that punishing or restraining your sexual partner would reinforce your relationship, but yet it truly can. Ladies particularly are anxious about the possibility that that permitting their partner to tie them up and rule them will let go of whatever is left of their relationship, yet this is not valid by any stretch of the imagination. If S&M is done right, S&M and servitude will build the trust and confidence you have in each other and open areas in your sexual lifestyle you never thought existed.

The most imperative thing to talk about before you welcome S&M and subjugation into the room is limits. You both should be in agreement with regards to how far you’re willing to investigate the darker side of sex. If you need to tie your accomplice up however he or she just needs to explore different avenues regarding a tickler, it’s not going to work. As we said some S&M is about communication. It’s completely vital for both of you to trust and regard each other’s limits. Before you get it on, take a seat and have a genuine dialog about what you need out of S&M and how far you both need to run with it. You should both also decide on a safe word that when said, guarantees if things get excessively hot and overwhelming for one of you to handle, you can say the safe word and cool off.

If you want to learn more about bondage why not check out this quick bondage guide

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Gay Bondage Play

Man Wearing Jeans Bound

Bondage play is an exciting new trend that has been introduced into many couples’ bedroom lately. First things first as a beginner in BDSM, you need to make sure that bondage play is what you and your partner want so that it will be consensual and safe. That means, leave alcohol, drugs and experience a proper sober experience. When you are taking part into a new type of sex, be careful and use your mind. Always experiment before going into depth.

Man with Bondage
Photo: Beginner’s Gay Bondage Play – Japanese Rope Bondage

It is important to understand that all types of bondage play require high levels of trust. A person will only let you restrain them if they are sure you won’t hurt them, or attempt anything that is not mutually agreed upon when they are not able to defend themselves. A man will want to know that you won’t hurt him, both physically and psychologically. He will want to be sure that you’re not going to leave him tied up and naked on the bed, while you take pictures of him or leaving him alone in the room tied up while you leave the house. A man wants to know that what you both do is safe.

  1. Buy the basic sex toys: To begin playing around in the room, you are going to need some very hot apparatuses. Gay bondage means you have to have a few instruments of sensual delight close by to heighten both of your sexual experiences. For example, you’ll require a whip, a chain or ropes, a blindfold and a restraint kit. When you have a few instruments close by, you can begin testing. Through this experimentation, you will see whether you get a kick out of the chance to command or on the off chance that you get a kick out of the chance to be the one fixing to the bed, blindfolded and whipped.
  2. Agree on a safety word: Before you start tying your man up, you should discuss and set a safety word. Safety words allow you to feel safe. When your man feels uncomfortable or unsafe he can say the safety word instantly, informing you that things have gotten out of control and thus asking you to stop.
  3. Don’t abuse power: As the overwhelming one, you have to know how critical your part is in a gay servitude situation. On the off chance that you have somebody fixed to the bed, handcuffed and blindfolded, you have a great deal of force, so you need to be aware and not to manhandle that force. Essentially, you have the ability to unfasten somebody when that individual says the settled upon safe word, so you wouldn’t abuse your power by keeping them held down you would let them go straight away. Essentially, the accommodating one truly has no force in specific circumstances, so it is dependent upon you to make that individual to feel safe. With regards to gay subjugation sex, trust is inconceivably imperative.
  4. Use soft material: For beginners, don’t get in depth with advance bondage gear. I advise you to use a tie, a scarf, stockings, cuffs made of Velcro and some rope. After you both decide what it is you’d want to use, bring it in the bedroom in a seductive way. Maybe let your men wear a sexy tie and untie him and ask him to spread his arms on the bed posts while slowly tie him up. At the same time tease his nipples and slowly go down to his penis. Tell him in a slowly with a gentle voice that you are tying him up and you are going to make him crazy. Give him a stroke, and check with him if he goes with the flow. Don’t act like it is for your own pleasure, your man needs to know that you’re doing what you do for both of you.
  5. Keep some safety scissors next to you: If you want to impress your man, show him that you are the master of ropes. Get some bondage ropes and explore different knots on his body while stimulating his sensitive parts. Make sure you keep a pair of safety scissors next to you in case you get him tied up in a knot, one that you can’t untie.

You see, bondage is a great addition to your bedroom. If you start slowly and master the basics, you can improve your sex life. You will drive your man crazy and he will be coming for more.

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