Mutual Masturbation

By the time you realise things are starting to go dull in your sex life it can start to spiral downhill really fast. You tend to freak out and think that you’re doing something wrong, or worse, your partner is doing something wrong and could possibly be starting to lose interest. Though, one of the easiest things to incorporate into your bedroom antics is mutual masturbation, and it’s funnily enough the thing I find couples don’t tend to think of when trying to change things up in the bedroom. We’ve all had fantasies about it. Thinking about our partner whilst we’re masturbating and possibly even envisioning them masturbating in front of you whilst you are…. so why not actually do it?

Mutual Masturbation is a sexual activity that does not include sexual penetration and can also be referred to as outercourse. Outercourse means different things to different people but usually excludes all penetration including vaginal, anal and oral. Outercourse includes things like frottage, mutual masturbation, fingering (oneself) and kissing. Not only is mutual masturbation or outercourse extremely hot, it’s also a preferred sexual act for a lot of people for a number of different reasons. Hetero couples may choose to engage in outercourse for reasons such as preserving virginity, an alternative to PIV sex or even as a form of birth control. Mutual masturbation may be done in situations where the participants do not feel ready, physically able, socially at liberty, or willing to engage in any penetrative sex act, or a particular penetrative sex act, but still wish to engage in a mutual sexual activity to ultimately achieve orgasm. Queer couples may also partake in outercourse also for preserving virginity, with some gay males using it as a substitute for anal  sex. Folks with STI’s/STD’s may also choose to exclusively partake in outercourse or mutual masturbation so as to completely reduce the risk of exchanging bodily fluids.

Mutual Masturbation sometimes get’s overlooked, its such a simple technique which can help to enhance couple’s sexual skill sets. Mutual Masturbation can help couple’s get to understand their partner’s bodies, their turn on’s and get to know all the correct buttons that need to be pressed. It allows your partner to look and explore your body, after all they are attracted to you so I couldn’t think of anything more enticing to them to actually have the power to play with the part’s that they love the most. They can use Mutual Masturbation as away to visually get turned on and see how your body reacts to their touch.


Johann Nepomunk Geiger Painting
Artwork: Johann Nepomunk Geiger


Mutual Masturbation was even shown in artwork dating all the way back to the 1840’s, famously by an artist called Johann Nepomunk Geiger (an Austrian Artist) who was a Court Painter by trade, erotic oil painter by night. His picture, shown above, depicts a heterosexual couple who are stimulating one another at the same time – this still falls under the category of mutual masturbation and outercourse.

In 2016, however, almost every adult couple has their sex toys – whether gay, straight, queer, trans or somewhere inbetween. Couples will often use a vibrator or any other form of sex toy on the other before penetrative sex, but not many think to use their toys on each other simultaneously while the other watches. This one simple act, fantasy, desire, whatever you want to call it, could be the key to charging up your sex life.

Not only is Mutual Masturbation super sexy, it’s also a great way to find out what your partner enjoys. We all know what gets us off, where our sweet spots are and exactly where to place your WeVibe Tango to get you going – so sometimes the simple act of your partner watching you can act as not only a MASSIVE turn on, but a disguised tutorial! Mutual masturbation can form a connection that will take your sex life to new heights and I can guarantee you will feel closer than ever before.
So grab your Tango and your Lelo Mona 2, or stay traditional and use your hands to show your partner exactly how you like it.


About the author:  Chloe is a consultant at the Adult Lifestyle Centre, Kogarah.

One Reply to “Mutual Masturbation”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *