Ill openly admit I hate everyone equally, how can you not, people are horrid! However, I do love people watching, that is fascinating, there is something that resinates in everyone and that is the act of judging people from afar, it doesn’t always have to be malicious or nasty, sometimes it’s fascinating and intriguing. Basically, I would love to sit everyone down (not in my personal space) and hear about their life story, because the question I often ponder is the grass always greener? You never know how well people hide their heart ache, mood swings, anger, and life issues in general.
Enter into the world of dating, relationships, and marriage and you enter into a different universe, there is such a wide variety of combinations put together and almost all have some sort of bias or connotations put with them. I am a light haired, yellow eyed, extremely white lady from the heart of Whitesville in a cluster of suburbs fondly known as “the shire” where most of its residents will openly tell you people need a passport to enter into their fine suburbs. “crossing” the bridge was an adventure where a multicultural world thrived beyond the waters boarders of “the shire”. However, since dying my hair significantly darker more people comment about my nationality as not being “Australian” and guess a range of other Eastern European backgrounds. Even though I am of Dutch/English background since when did hair colour mean someone MUST be of a different race?
My various relationships have opened my eyes to what I was really searching for and it wasn’t until now that I have found it. I used to get so frustrated at not feeling as though I “fit in”, I kept wondering why no one ever felt right or why I would get frustrated at the situation I was in. it was until I met this person and his family that I felt I had finally met a match to my own family. I was searching for someone who was like my family who valued family time and the importance of family as much as I do. I have always explained my family as a “wog style” family basically a family that above all is family who eats together, who is close, who puts family first and holds all the values of a strong unit and team. Which is why to me family opinions of my partner or future partner is so important, and why basically to me unless my family likes my partner its make or break of the relationship.
What I have noticed is some people’s reactions to those who date out of their cookie cutter mold of race. Despite the looks some couples receive dating someone of a different race is just like dating any other human being. Typical behaviors such as learning each other’s quirks, being attracted to one another, learning about their past and building a life together are some pretty normal qualities of a relationship.
Stereotypes are a real thing, and what some people of a certain race do that give a bad name to the rest doesn’t mean they are all the same. People are individuals it is foolish to assume everyone from that part of the world is alike and they don’t have their own struggles.
Love doesn’t conquer all and there are huge pressures to date within your own race, especially from some families, and it is something you can’t change. Family opinions are fairly prevalent and can be frustrating when you’re not what the parents are hoping for.
There is so much to learn the world is a big open place with there are so many different traditions and that is something that fascinates me. Family time, foods that are common and staples, these are huge eye openers when you are dating someone not necessarily in your own cookie cutter race. Being with someone who has a different background to you means they have a whole history that you might not know about or understand, the fun part is learning about their countries history. How often can you show someone how much you care and how much you love them by learning their language or about their countries history and making them feel important and special.
Strong communication is so so important especially if the person you are with didn’t learn English as their first language, sometimes comments or phrases they are taught might take on a different meaning to us and you have to be aware that they aren’t being malicious or nasty it is actually just translation. “proper English” is a lot different to the “slang” that is typically used in Australia but explaining why certain words may offend you or why certain words may take on a different meaning aren’t understood unless you explain! Like any other relationship communication is key, understanding the root of the issue is key, cultural differences are a real thing, but nothing can me fixed, understood, or sorted unless we communicate them to our partner.
Interracial dating isn’t harder than any other relationship, however cultural differences are normally the main issues initially when starting out and does add an extra difficulty when neither person doesn’t want to budge, add on the looks you cop from outsiders or even friends and it can cause for some tense moments. All relationships need to me illuminating, full of compassion, understanding, and learning about someone else’s life and the things they love.
Morgan x
Meet Morgan, a young designer advocating equality and speaking out against violence. Her journey in the adult industry has been transformative.