Believe it or not, there was a time where “dating” was all about men trying to woo women they would marry shortly after. Nowadays, it can take many forms – from regular face-to-face dating and dating via apps to more kinky stuff like transgender dating.
These are more or less a norm today, but what happens when someone practices such activities for a while and suddenly decides to take a one-month break? Well, I wouldn’t know about everyone, but I know what happened to me when I quit dating apps for a month.
Withdrawal and Closing Up
Let’s get something straight – I didn’t decide to quit because my whole experience with dating apps was a complete failure. Moreover, I had a lot of fun over the course of 10 months of using them, I went on numerous dates and got close to having a steady relationship not once, but twice.
Still, I figured it out it was time to take a break partially because I had to focus on other things (job, studies) and partially because I wanted to have a small experiment with the whole situation. What came next wasn’t exactly what I expected, though.
The first wave of jitters appeared while I was uninstalling the apps from my phone. I had a total of four, but I only used two regularly. It felt like I was walking away from something I worked very hard on, even though these apps were supposed to only serve as something I was doing in my spare time. The feeling was quite different, surprisingly.
Then, I caught myself having itchy fingers while sitting alone at home in the evening. My hand was going for the phone and wanted to check one of the apps, but the amount of disappointment I felt once I remembered I deleted all the apps was stunning and a bit soul-crushing.
Relapsing, Caving in and Freedom
As it is with any addiction, going cold turkey on my dating app addiction led me to a relapse eventually. One day, I was walking down to the gym and I passed by a handsome guy who seemed like the man I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with at that moment.
Immediately, I went ahead and downloaded the app trying to find him, but once I realized I didn’t have any information on him besides the way he looked, I realized I succumbed to a serious crisis in a moment of weakness.
That was the one and only time I caved in.However, this was not the end of my troubles. What really shocked me was my inability to meet people in person, whether on a date or as acquaintances. I guess when you spend so much time on dating apps, you forget how to communicate with others in the offline world properly.
Finally, nearing the end of the month, the anxiety grip got looser, the pressure lifted up and I actually felt truly free in a very long time. There was no rush to find the perfect guy and the nervous feeling I would have when I had to send a message to someone for the first time was completely gone.
Bottom line, by one-month hiatus from dating apps taught me something important: online dating sure is useful and efficient, but it can become a very personal monster if you dive into it too deeply.
Stefan Simonovic is a popular content writer from first beat media.
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