17 Secret Gay Colour Code Meanings

Gay Colour Codes

The handkerchief colour code which is also known as the hanky code, bandana code, and flagging is a system used by the gay, androgynous and BDSM community which was developed in the 1970s. It is used to identify people looking for casual sex encounters. It can be used to identify whether the person is a top or a bottom, the ideal types of sexual experiences and fetishes they are interested in.

The handkerchief colour code is used worldwide but is popularly used in United States, Canada, Europe, Australia and South Africa. If you were to have a look at the Folsom Street Fair in San Francisco and the after parties that followed, you’d notice that the patrons may wear a variety of different colourful clothing items which use the handkerchief colour code.

The Gay Community’s History Of The Colour Code System

In 1855, after the Gold Rush in San Francisco men would go to square dances after work or on the weekends. They would dance with other men since there was a deficiency of women. The men who would take the female part would wear a red bandana and the men who took the male part would wear a blue bandana. They would place the bandana around the arm, attach it to their belt or place it in their back pocket of their pants.

In 1970 to 1971, the popularity of the colour code system took off in New York when a writer for the Village Voice kidded that rather than just wearing keys to show whether somebody was a top or a bottom, it would be more efficient for people to wear coloured hankies to report their specific sexual preferences.

Although the Handkerchief Colour Code was a main part of the society and culture in the 70s and 80s. Its popularity declined during the AIDS epidemic. In the 90s the colour codes became popular again but the items of clothing diversified from hankies to various other forms of coloured accessories.

Items Of Clothing That Use The Colour Coding System

Handkerchief Colour Code system is not just limited to handkerchiefs. It can be used with different types of day to day wear that can be worn discretely including:

  • Keys
  • Handkerchiefs
  • Bandanas
  • Belts
  • Wrist bands
  • Flags

What Area Of The Body Should I Wear The Handkerchief Colour Code?

Originally the system was limited to people in the gay, androgynous and BDSM community wearing keys on the left or right side of the body as a form of symbolism to tell another person whether they were a top or a bottom. Now, people can use the colour code system on different areas of the body to mean different things.

The Left Side Of The Body

Wearing a handkerchief on the left half of the body commonly demonstrates one is a top.

The Right Side Of The Body

Wearing a handkerchief on the right half of the body commonly demonstrates one is a bottom.

Other Areas Of The Body

Other clothing items included in the coding system can be worn on different areas of the body. For example, Bandanas may be worn in the front or back pocket. They can also be tied around the neck with the knot on the individuals preferred side. It can also just be a stylistic preference.

Gay colour code system
Image: Hanky Code

What Are The Colour Codes?

There is no definitive handkerchief colour code system as the meanings can change depending on the groups, community or geographic location. If you are confused about the colour code, you will need to check with the adult lifestyle event, venue, community or individual to understand what it means to them. Even though this is the case, there is an acceptance to which colours should be generally used for standard sexual preferences.

Standard Colour Codes

  • Yellow: Urolagnia, Urophilia, Undinism, Golden Showers and Watersports.
  • Brown: Coprophilia and Scatophilia.
  • Black: Heavy Sadomasochism.
  • Dark Blue: Anal Sex.
  • Light Blue: Oral Sex.
  • Orange: Up for Anything.
  • Grey: Bondage.
  • Red: Fisting.

Other Colour Codes In The BDSM Community That Vary In Meaning

  • Green: Sex workers and prostitutes.
  • White: Virgin or someone who is new to the scene. They may be looking for a lover but would like to take things slow.
  • White With Polka Dots: Looking for an orgy, hosting an orgy or enjoys orgies.
  • Silver Bells: Pet play and animal roleplay.
  • Blue: Mentor, guide, safe person or someone willing to help others.
  • Red With White Stripes: Enjoys grooming activities like shaving people or being shaved.
  • Leopard: Enjoys or has tattoos, body modification and/or body art.
  • Light Purple: Energy Play.
  • Purple: Enjoys being spanked or spanking.

Adult Products That Use The Colour Code System

Falcon Gay Codes
Image: Icon Brands Sex Toys

Icon Brands has designed an adult product named “Falcon Leather Code Bands” which uses the colour code system. The Falcon Leather Code Bands can be worn as day to day wear as they look incredibly discrete.  It can be worn on your wrist, ankle or even as a cock ring. So you can wear it publicly for all to see and when you find someone who matches your sexual preferences you use it to enhance your erection.

Stephen is a cis-gendered gay male who spends far too much time with his two cats and eating tim tams. A self-identified sex-positive advocate he cares deeply about gender equality, disabilities, sexual education and social issues. Opinionated and bold he isn’t afraid to speak his mind and say what others won’t. With a yearning for knowledge and experience in all things relating to sex, he is a prolific writer that has developed the content for a myriad of informative Sexual Health and Wellness websites.

Stephen’s articles and writings tends to focus on social issues, sexual education, queer issues and all things fetish and absurd. He comes qualified with the completion of a double Bachelor degree in Social Sciences and literature, and a Masters in Education.

Sexy Santa’s Special Edition – Gifts Just For Him!

Christmas sex toys for men

That’s right! Sexy Santa is back but this time I am recommending gifts just for him! I didn’t want anyone to feel left out and start complaining (I’ll hear enough of that from my family at Christmas!). So here is a cheat sheet for those who are maybe a little lost when it comes to buying the man in their life a gift.

Male Sex Toys

I think people are a quiet surprised when they come into an Oh! Zone Adult Lifestyle Centre and see the range of products that we carry for men. Over recent years male sex toys have been increasing in both availability and acceptance. Sex toys or acts that were thought of as taboo or “wrong” (I hate that word when it comes to sex) are now being seen for what they are, incredible ways to enhance your sex life. So come with Sexy Santa as I walk you through the options available and recommend some of my favourites.

Cock Rings

Ok so we will start with the most basic and widely known male sex toy, the cock ring. A cock ring can have two main functions; the first is that it can help a man maintain an erection. Using a simple silicone ring around the base of the penis can help restrict blood flood allowing the erection to last longer and look more impressive. The second function of a cock ring is to add pleasure for both the wearer and their partner. Cock rings that come with vibrating bullets, beads or a multitude of other attachments are for the purpose of enhancing your sexual experience.

Perfect Fit Stackit Cock Ring

This cock ring is a super simple but super stretchy, it is my favourite non vibrating cock ring. It is a SilaSkin ring that can be placed around the shaft or around the shaft and balls depending on your preference. Some people think it looks too small but trust me when I say it is super stretchy, I can and have fit one over my head before, if that’s too small, good for you.

Cock ring used to last longer in bed
Image: Perfect Fit Stackit Cock Ring

Colt Rechargeable Cock Ring

Colt is a very sturdy brand of sex toys, they are meant for men who like to play and their rechargeable cock ring doesn’t disappoint. Made of high quality silicone this vibrating cock ring can be used again and again and is a good choice if you want something a little more permanent than the semi-disposable ones that most people recognise.

Cock ring for men
Image: Colt Rechargeable Cock Ring


A masturbator is a relatively new type of sex toy for men, the idea of them is that instead of using your boring old hand when you masturbate you can use a beautiful masturbator that looks like a vagina, anus or mouth. Masturbators are becoming extremely popular with all different types of people and one would make a perfect gift for the man in your life.

Porn Hub Double Penetration Stroker: Pussy and Ass

So Porn Hub (the very popular adult website) has released a great range of sex toys for men and amongst the range is the Double Penetration Stroker. It is made from a high quality silicone and comes in a case which makes handling and hiding easier. I love this sex toy because it is almost like you are getting a two for one with a pussy at one end and if the mood strikes anal at the other end.

Men's masturbator that looks realistic
Image: Porn Hub Double Penetration Stroker Pussy and Ass

Joy-Lite Masturbator Range

I’m a huge fan of this well-made masturbator range and it is a range, Joy-Lite has a masturbator for everyone. They are queer inclusive and carry something for everyone, they only problem is picking just one.

Realistic masturbator
Image: Joy-Lite Masturbator Range

Prostate Sex Toys

A lot like masturbators, prostate sex toys are becoming one of the main male sex toys; finally men (of any and every sexuality) are beginning to discover the potential of their prostate! But before I give you my recommendations let me quickly explain what and where the prostate is.

The prostate is a gland, its main function is to produce the milky white substance that occurs when you ejaculate (not the sperm or the semen that is made in the testicles) this substance acts as protection for the sperm to help it reach its goal (an egg). However the prostate is also extremely sensitive and receptive to sensations like vibration and penetration. This means that when it is stimulated the prostate can create an incredible amount of pleasure.

Here’s the thing though, to get to the prostate you go through the anal cavity and this tends to be the unfortunate sticking point for many men, they don’t want to take anything up the butt (however most also don’t mind bugging their partners for that very same act!) and because of that fear they are locking off a whole world of pleasure to themselves.

With the right sex toy, lube and patience prostate play will become a game changer for your sex life.

Here is a little map for those wanting to find their way:

The location of the prostate
Image: Prostate

Fun Factory Duke

Fun Factory is a great brand out of Germany (a country that knows its sex toys) they make intelligently designed sex toys for both men and women. The Duke their male sex toy is no different, it can be used as both a prostate and perineum toy at the same time.

Prostate sex toy in blue
Image: Fun Factory Duke

Nu Sensuelle Homme Pro

While this sex toy may look a little strange, it knows what it is doing. This 10 function prostate sex toy also comes with a rolling ball massager tip that will work the prostate like never before.

P-spot massager
Buy Now | Sex Toys For Men

Well that’s all from Sexy Santa this week, come back next week for our final Sexy Santa for the Christmas season!

Until then, happy shopping.


Sexy Santa

Author: Jamie is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres

Sexpert is our resident full time sex blogger. Having successfully owned and managed a number of blogs relating to women’s lifestyle, she easily blended into her role as chief blogger of the Adultsmart Blog. She is in a long term relationship with her boyfriend. She also runs Good Girl Guide, a sexual lifestyle blog.

6 Thrilling Buck’s Party Ideas You Can Do At Home

Bucks Party at home

Okay, it’s the most important day of your life… Yes that’s right your bucks party! That’s why we have teamed up with the girls from Bad Bunny to deliver some awesome buck’s party ideas. Now these aren’t your typical ideas like paint balling or a pub crawl, no, these ideas are all about bringing the party to your crib! That’s right these are 6 awesome bucks party ideas you can do at home, enjoy.

Sumo Suits

This is the closest thing you will get to real WWE Smack Down… Sumo wrestling… well inflatable summo wrestling!! This is a great idea for any bucks party, especially those who don’t mind a bit of Rey Mysterio. There is 1 rule however and that is the Stag (man of honour) must sumo wrestle against every one of his boys at least once throughout the night. This not only gives you a chance to wale on the best man but also to prove once and for all who is truly the wrestling champion amongst you.

Sumo Suit at a bucks party
Image: Sumo Suit

Mechanical Bull

Saddle up cowboy because this is gonna be one hell of a ride… a bull ride that is…. well a mechanical bull ride? (You didn’t think we would recommend a real bull did you!) This spinning and twisting ride of terror is the perfect item for any soon to be married man at a bucks party. Test your strength and stamina, see who out of your mates is truly the Clint Eastwood of the gang. Use this bucking bull for hours of fun with drinking games. Of course, the main cowboy (the future groom) should get the first shot at taming this wild mechanical beast… especially when the settings are on super-fast.

Mechanical Bull at a bucks party
Image: Mechanical Bull

Jelly Wrestling

I love Aeroplane Jelly… Aeroplane Jelly for me… (Sorry for reminiscing) When looking for buck’s night ideas you can do at home look no further than jelly wrestling! This crowd favourite is always guaranteed to get you sticky all over. When organising the lady entertainment for your stag party you should ask for a performer (or 4) who will be willing to participate in the jelly wrestling events.

Luckily, our Bad Bunnies love jelly! We had a buck’s party where two strippers got into the jelly with the lucky buck and completely smashed him. It was one of the most brilliant things we have ever seen here at Bad Bunny. So if you are keen to get a little messy then Jelly Wrestling is the perfect idea to set up at your home bucks party, all you need is an inflatable pool and a Sh@#t tone of jelly… have fun.

Bubble Soccer

So your one mate thinks he is the Aussie Beckham… he thinks he should be playing for Manchester. Well bubble soccer is the perfect way to really see what he is made of… also it’s a ton of fun. Bubble Soccer is an awesome, action packed game for up to as many players as you want on each side. You’ll be bumping into each other at speed, most times the soccer ball will get completely ignored as you just try and crash into each other. Don’t worry for all your wusses out there playing bubble football is perfectly safe as you are fully in cased and protected… a bit like bubble boy.

Bubble Soccer ata bucks party
Image: Bubble Soccer

Axe Throwing

Are you ready to get your inner Viking on? Well there is only one true way to test your might and that’s by throwing rusty axes at blocks of wood. This is so simple to set up as it only requires a small axe and some blocks of wood. Place the targets a safe distance away. Let out a fierce scream like you’re auditioning for the role of Thor and let the fun begin. Now normally we would incorporate some kind of drinking game into any bucks activity (it is a buck’s night, what do you expect!) But in this case we thought we should maybe leave it, we don’t want any fingers going missing now do we? Instead we recommend keeping a points system and the one with the least at the end has to scull some sort of vile mix of drinks… whatever the punishment this game is a guaranteed good time.

Axe Throwing at a bucks party
Image: Axe Throwing

Naked Chief

If you are thinking of a nice meal to celebrate your buck’s night but don’t want to go to a restaurant then a topless or nude chief is exactly what you need. Basically it’s as simple as it sounds, you will have either a topless or nude chief cook up an amazing meal of your choice, plus you will get to see all the action as this sexy master chief prepares the meal, guaranteeing to have your mouths watering even before you are served the dish. Now this type of event also goes great with some topless waitresses to serve the food and drinks, giving you an experience that restaurants simply cannot.

We hope you have enjoyed our list of different buck’s party ideas that you can do from home. Keep a look out on our blog for more buck’s party related content. Be sure to also check out the bucks and bachelorette party items.

Adultsmart welcomes Guest Bloggers to submit 800 word articles with original content about topics relating to sexual lifestyle, health and wellness. If you would like to participate, send an email to rick.xsales@gmail.com with your ideas or an article that you wish to submit. If you publish multiple articles on Adultsmart’s Blog you will become an Adultsmart Expert.

Details of the guest blogger who has submitted this article are located above.

20 Dating Tricks You Wish You Knew

Dating troubles

Whether you are new to the dating world or hopping back into the dating pool for the…? time, the water is always cold and cloudy to start with. It takes a bit of time to find your feet but sure enough before long you’ll be off and running.
It doesn’t matter if the date is with someone you’ve met online that you have been chatting with for months or a blind date set up by a mutual friend. Going on dates can be a tad overwhelming. The whole premise of dating is to be vulnerable and let someone get close to you, this alone is enough to make someone apprehensive for whatever reason. On top of the emotional factors, there is always physical risks and I’m not just referring to a potential assault; but also transportation etc.

Over the years from personal experience as well as countless hours being a shoulder for “girl” friends, mates or the random drunk crying person at the end of a night out. Through all of these experience and conversations, I have compiled a few tips that I think can help to make the dating experience smarter and safer.

These tips are in no particular order and should be taken at face value. These have worked for me and for others, please use them as you will, change and adapt as you go. No two people go through the dating world on the same path. Find out what works for you and don’t be ashamed of it.

I hope you find some use in the tips below, just remember to date safe and smart!

1. There’s more to life and happiness than a relationship!

It’s great to want a relationship but obsession is not a good look on anyone.

2. You gotta like single you!

If you’re unhappy with yourself and your lifestyle, how is someone else supposed to want to spend time with you, little own make you feel better about yourself?

3. Date yourself a bit!

If the whole idea of planning a date seems overwhelming, take yourself out a few times before jumping into the dating pool. Find out what you like to do, know your limits.

4. Dating isn’t about proving your worth to someone! (You already are worth it!)

It’s about finding someone you can be comfortably yourself with. Someone you can spend ridiculous amounts of time with doing NOTHING!

5. Stop worrying about being “rejected” for being “too fat”, “too short” or whatever!

You may have had to reject them later on for having not seen Pretty Woman or the Latest DC movie. Everyone has their own “fit” of personality traits in a relationship they would like their lover to have.

6. When someone says “I’m too damaged” or “I have too much baggage”, believe them!

Forget low self-esteem and self-deprecation. This person does not need you to pick them up and put their pieces back together.

7. First dates are not interviews for marriage (Save that till you meet their mother)

While first impressions count for a lot, give these things time, that’s what getting to know someone is about.

8. Make the first few dates public and use separate transportation.

This reassures a sense of independence and safety for both parties.

9. Turn off your phone!

How do you expect to open up to someone or for someone to open up to you when there is a glowing screen between you?

Man waiting for his date
Image: Waiting For Date

10. Avoid the “ex” conversations.

An ex is in the past, leave it there.

11. Action dates are best to start with!

Most people already sit at a desk from 9-5, try planning dates that get you up and out. Move around and try different things. This is a sure way to instigate good conversation.

12. Don’t be afraid to google!

It’s 2017 almost 2018… if you’re about to go on a date with someone you’ve never met and share no mutual contacts… try giving them a google search, it might save yourself an awkward bombshell.

13. Limit the boozy beverages.

One before to calm the nerves, one to start the meal and get the conversation going… And see how you feel from there. You should always be in complete control of yourself.

14. Eye gazing tells you a lot.

Researchers have found that when someone is romantically “into” another person their gaze tends to land on and around the face. When the feelings are more sexual their eyes wander around the other person’s body.

15. $20

Always have $20 tucked away. $20 may not get you home, but it will get you $20 closer to home!

16. Say what you mean and mean what you say!

Don’t say you’re going to call unless you really intend to call!

17. Don’t be afraid of the second date!

Unless the first date was a nightmare give the second one a go, perhaps you’ll both be more like yourselves?

18. Consider pulling someone out of the “Friend Zone”.

Friends are friends, but perhaps there is a certain person you just haven’t looked at in the right light. I mean they’re in your life for a reason?

19. No guilt for moving on!

If you don’t feel any sort of something from date one 2 or even 12, know it’s ok to move on. Not everyone is going to be a fit.

20. No games!

Forget the 3 days or 48 hours no call rules or whatever you’ve heard. Be yourself, call or text when YOU feel appropriate. (Just remember obsession doesn’t look good on anyone!). Unless they are adult games you would like to play!

Author: Patrick Kriz- BA Psychology Human Sexuality

Patrick Kriz has a Bachelor Degree (Honours) in Psychology – Human Sexuality. Patrick is a wonderful man that has a wealth of knowledge and is happy to share this with those around him. He is articulate, educated and the provider or interesting and educational writings.

Having been a regular contributor to this blog for the past couple of months he has consented to add his profile to our ever expanding list of bloggers that provide us with the great content provided to you. We thank all our contributors and authors and a special thanks to Patrick whom we deem to be an expert on all things relating to sexual wellness and adult lifestyle with quality writings. Be sure to follow Patrick on Instagram.

VIP Interview With Angela Mohlfeld Head Of Communication From JOYDIVISION

Sex toy company display

JOYDIVISION is an award winning adult lifestyle company which was established in 1994. They have designed over 250 different products ranging from sex toys, sexual health aids, massage oils, swings and personal lubricants which are all manufactured with love in Germany. Their products are made in Germany so that they are able to maintain high levels of quality control.

JOYDIVISION’s design products are well thought out with careful detailing which always take into consideration the current adult lifestyle and environmental trends. Their products are made with a sex positive approach which supports the exploration of sexuality. JOYDIVISION have won countless awards including the Universal Design Award, Reddot Design Award, Deltra Award and the Erotixxx Award.

JOYDIVISION are well known for developing the worlds very first 100% all natural lubricant that sells worldwide and the soft-tampon which is worn by women during sexual intercourse. They have a strong focus towards making products out of Silikomed which is a type of hypoallergenic material that can be used with all different types of personal lubricants ranging from water-based and silicone.

What inspired the creation of JOYDIVISION?

Our CEO Oliver Redschlag is the head of the company and his inspirations have shaped JOYDIVISION. The German lubricant, adult toy and hygiene manufacturer, JOYDIVISION was established in 1994 by Oliver Redschlag. Like many start-ups, Oliver Redschlag worked from his garage, in his case designing and manufacturing Loveswings. Within weeks, he had revolutionized the market of Loveswings and overwhelming reviews were published in over 36 journals and magazines across the country.

By 1997 and now based in Hannover/Germany, JOYDIVISION developed and started shipping BIOglide – the first 100% all natural lubricant. This was followed a year later with the Soft-Tampon, the tampons without strings for hygienic intercourse during menstruation. JOYDIVISION are the only company to manufacture the string less Soft-Tampon which has allowed women to enjoy sports, spa & love anytime they want to, without a second thought.

A soft tampon for penetrative sex
Image: Soft Tampon

Tell me about your product range?

The extensive JOYDIVISION product range comprises more than 250 sensual erotic premium products, which are successfully sold in more than 60 countries around the world. In addition to lubricants, the products ranges from love toys, hygiene articles, massage, love swings and special products for sexual preparation. JOYDIVISION attaches great importance to the highest quality and production in Germany for all its products.

How many products has JOYDIVISION created?

JOYDIVISION has made a name for itself as an innovative inventor of the world’s first 100% natural lubricant (BIOglide) and the millionfold popular lubricant (AQUAglide).

Personal and medical lubricant
Buy Now | JOYDIVISION Sex Toy And Sexual Health Products

In 2011, JOYDIVISION introduced the world’s most discreet loveballs with the patent integrated loop and technology inside. Joyballs secret are comfortable to wear and quiet as a whisper and are an innovative adult product that has earned three awards including the reddot design award and the Delta Design award. Joyballs are made of skin-friendly, hypoallergenic and velvety-soft Silikomed® – making them dishwasher safe and usable with both water based and silicon based lubricants.

The latest invention is the XPANDER.

What materials are used in the creation of JOYDIVISION’s products? What quality are they? Are they body safe?

JOYDIVISION has always been very important for material and skin compatibility. JOYDIVISION has developed Silikomed®, for example. Silikomed® is an innovative and non-porous material of the highest medical quality, developed by us, as well as silicone. It is characterized by a very soft, velvety and skin caressing surface. In contrast to other materials, Silikomed® can be used with all lubricants, even with silicone-based lubricants. Silikomed® has been specially developed to meet the high quality demands of JOYDIVISION: medical quality, mucous membrane friendly, hypoallergenic, dermatologically and clinically tested.

Are all your products manufactured in Germany?

Yes, all our products are:

“Made with love in Germany“

JOYDIVISION was the first ever company to release a 100% natural lubricant named BIOglide. What are the benefits of having an all-natural personal lubricant?

BIOglide is a product that offers the consumer absolutely worry-free application.

In cooperation with the German BDIH (Association of Industrial Companies and Trading Firms for Pharmaceuticals), JOYDIVISION developed a new standard and seal of approval, “Natural Product – Standard approved by BDIH, specifically granted for selected medical devices meeting the requirements. After an extensive examination BIOglide is the first product allowed to carry the seal, guaranteeing the naturalness of a medical device.

Since 1995, JOYDIVISION has supported AIDS-Hilfe by UNICEF and Terre des Hommes, why is it important to support these organisations?

Social and environmental commitment has always been a top priority at JOYDIVISION. Since 1995, JOYDIVISION has been an official supporting member of the AIDS-HILFE, of UNICEF e. V. and TERRE DES HOMMES e. V. and is also involved in the creation of jobs and training places.

What are your best sellers?

Original AQUAglide has been creating trust for more than 15 years. The “AQUAglide” lubricant brand is known for its top quality made in Germany. The AQUAglide series has been extended to include AQUAglide sensitive. Due to the valuable and moisturizing hyaluronic acid, the sensitive gel not only provides optimum long-term gliding properties for intimate intercourse, but also develops caring properties on a natural basis. Without glycerine and parabens, the sensitive vaginal flora is gently protected and pampered with additional moisture. We recommend everyone to test the product once, because the skin sensation is sensational.

Our special threadless soft tampons are another top seller. Unlike conventional tampons, the soft tampons are not made of viscose or cotton, but of a special soft foam material that is compatible with mucous membranes. Soft tampons are not only suitable for all everyday activities, but also for discreet wearing in the sauna (no thread is visible) carrying it safely while swimming (reduces the risk of infection) hygienic intimate intercourse during the period of the rule (is not noticeable for the partners)

With the lifestyle product soft tampons, millions of women in many countries have already been able to enjoy their freedom.


Sexpert is our resident full time sex blogger. Having successfully owned and managed a number of blogs relating to women’s lifestyle, she easily blended into her role as chief blogger of the Adultsmart Blog. She is in a long term relationship with her boyfriend. She also runs Good Girl Guide, a sexual lifestyle blog.

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