A Very Bad Dragons Oral Serving

Anyone that knows me knows that I’m a nerd, that I love dick and am excited to get a Bad Dragons Oral Serving. It’s no surprise that I’ve had my eyes on Bad Dragon Sex Toys for a very long time. They’re a company that, from when I first noticed them several years ago, have always seemed to be spoken highly of.

They had a great reputation among my circle of friends, and when longingly looking at the products that they stocked, would both inspire an awe dropping look, combined with profound arousal. For whatever reason though, I kept putting it off and didn’t take the plunge.

Then I was asked if I wanted to do a review on a Bad Dragon product. Well, with the speed of light, my hand shot upwards, putting The Flash to shame.

So what is it about Bad Dragon?

They’re a company that has a solid base in the fantasy community. And this is a community that can amass a cult, like following on a lot of things out there. From the BD website, you can read that they were founded in the late 2000’s with a love of all things fantasy.  Through the understanding that there just weren’t a lot of fantasy themed adult toys out there, and that’s pretty much true to this day.

When you’re looking at dildos and sex toys there’s an overabundance of choice. Sex toys that mimic the look of human genitalia, but when it comes to something that looks a little less human, or something that stands out from the crowd – there’s a lot less.

There was a niche that wasn’t being filled and Bad Dragon was determined to fly in to the rescue. Unlike a lot of other companies out there, Bad Dragon not only offers something that sits outside of the box, but they also offer an extensive level of customisation. So when I was offered the chance to select one, I honestly did not know where to start.

Not only did they all look amazing, but then they had the options of size, colour, and then firmness!  I absolutely love this attention to detail. It’s not so much of a

‘pick a cock that looks like every other cock from the wall and take it home’

kind of moment. But from start to finish, it’s like you have a direct hand in the creation of this sex toy. That is something that very much reminds me of the cognitive thought processes of the ‘Ikea Effect’ – whereby individuals place a high value on things that they have partially created.

It’s an amazing marketing POV and fits right in this niche market they’re filling. Sure, the base design is something you pick – but from that moment of selecting the base design, you can take your dildo to the edges of your imagination and beyond as you customise it to your own tastes. It’s a shit load of fun.

Stressful as you try and get the perfect design, but immensely fun.

After searching endlessly on their website, I ended up selecting the Winston’s Tongue. It appealed to me with its smoothness, the detailing of the jaw, the curvature and the super-hot idea of a dragon tongue on my ass. My complete order was the tongue in Small, Medium Firmness and in blue signature. I wasn’t overly sure about the firmness, and this is one of the things about ordering a sex toy from an online website.

You’re just not always sure what to expect. So I just rolled with it.

Fast forward a week or so later, and the box arrived. I was stunned with what was inside. Not only had I been sent the dildo, but I’d also been sent some Dragon Cum Lube in White, Sex Toy Cleaner and a Key Ring. Talk about going the extra leg and really going all out and I was pleasantly surprised.

Bad Dragon’s Cum Lube

Now, before we get to the dildo, I want to talk about the Cum Lube. Because it’s just amazing and it certainly deserves a mention. Whilst I wasn’t expecting it – this is one super fun lubricant and right off the bat. I’ll admit it’s shot up to the top of my favourite personal lubricants. It’s hot, it’s sexy, it’s messy as all hell, but it’s just so fitting.

I was in the shower when I first tried it and the Dragon sex toy. It had streaks of it going left, right and just all over the place. Exactly what you’d expect if Spiderman ejaculated into your hand, a “sticky” wet mess, and what amazes me most, is that it’s water based. I’ve hated water-based lubricants and the only reason that I ever use it is for sex toys.

I hate the smell, the tackiness, and it’s generally just shit. This, however, is durable and, by the photos, it seems sticky and it is. But it’s not tacky. It’s slick, and stretchy and sinuous. I can’t say that I’ve ever had as much fun playing with lubricant as I did when I got my hands on this.

A wet lubricant, slick and fun. If you’re considering getting a Bad Dragon dildo because you think the fantasy element is hot, then you’re going to need this Dragon Cum Lube too. The two just go together like butter on hot toast.

What I Love About My Winston’s Tongue

Now… the tongue. I chose the tongue because it wasn’t a cock, and I was really looking for something different. This is pitched as an oral expert and a cunning linguist, and it was certainly something that I was intrigued by. I loved the look of it. The colour I chose looked amazing, and unlike a lot of the other variants – this one was smooth.

I went smooth because I admit; I wasn’t sure just how the silicone was going to be. Ribbing on the underside of the tongue looked like it was going to be fun. The few silicone sex toys I have, whilst some are super soft and squishy, others are hurtfully hard with prolonged use. When I got this in my hands, I was surprised at the flexibility of the sex toy, the softness and the way it felt.

Now don’t get me wrong, this tongue wasn’t a marshmallow, but nor was it a solid rock and it felt good. I just love the detailing on it, despite the simplicity of it. The top of the tongue has a muscle like groove in the middle which extends towards the tip before petering out. Running your fingers along this, leaving a trail of lubricant behind, and you can almost imagine that you’re stroking a tongue of some creature – it’s so cool. Even more so that when you reach the top of the tongue, that it just moves with you.

The Oral Tongue Has Ribbing On Both Sides

On the other side, the back of the tongue has ribbing on either side of the ‘muscle’. Subtle enough to not be over the top, but not so subtle, so as not to be felt. While the shaft is fairly standard, it’s the ‘housing’ of the shaft which really sets this apart in my world, for it’s a tongue coming out of a dragon’s mouth. From the flared nostrils of the dragon to the teeth on either side of the tongue – did I mention that this was hot?

Bad Dragons Oral Serving

The tongue is, in my opinion, perfectly shaped and curved. Faded blue to dark blue that I ordered simply doing its part in = making the sex toy look stunning. That tongue is quite thin, and very, very flexible. They’re dead right in the sense that this has been built with oral pleasures in mind.

During one session I lubed up this tongue with the Cum Lube, put the tip against my body and let it ‘lick’ my thighs and worked it slowly up. Between the flexibility of the tongue and the lubricant, it left a delightful strand of realistic looking cum that just sits against your skin – but it felt amazing. The way that the tip of the tongue is grooved like a muscle and the way it just ‘responds’ to a little pressure.

Well, this is fast becoming one of my most used and favourite sex toys.

Author: Stephen Smith – BA Of Social Sciences, M.Ed

A Taste Of Vergil’s Very Bad Dragon

Look, I don’t get the whole eggplant thing – emojis and all. When people started sending me eggplants with a question mark on Grindr, I was the boy that responded with –

“Nah, no salads for me thanks”.

I just didn’t get it, and to be honest, I still don’t. So when I was approached to review a Bad Dragon sex toy called the Vergil, which very much looked like an eggplant, I had mixed feelings.

My previous review, I was absolutely excited to get the chance to experience a Bad Dragon sex toy. I’d heard a lot about their company and their products. In fact, I’d been on their website to look longingly at their range. I’d heard nothing but good things about them.

Yet, the fact that it reminded me of an eggplant…  still confused me. I pride myself on my open-mindedness, though. Remembering all the things I’d heard about Bad Dragon from my fellow co-workers, and from my fellow fantasy freak friends who I play Dungeons and Dragons with, I was intrigued.

Bad Dragon’s Fantasy Dildos

Bad Dragon is a sex toy company that makes awesome looking dildos and sex toys that are absolutely out of this world. There’s nothing like them. A quick research on their products states that every single Bad Dragon sex toy is handmade from platinum cured silicone – the highest quality grade of silicone that you can get.

If you’re a fan of dragons, and all things fantasy related you will love them. Your ass will be munched on by a dragon’s tongue – like my co-workers – then Bad Dragon toys will happily lick your ass till kingdom comes. I was also kind of hoping for the prestige of having the ability for when someone sent me an eggplant on Grindr, that I’d be able to turn around and send them a photo of mine.

Saying, ‘Thanks, but I already have one’.

All this had crossed my mind before the product even arrived. So in my head I had built up this amazing fantasy of my new toy and was eager to wrap my legs around it.

Experimenting With Bad Dragon’s Vergil

Unfortunately, like all good packages, it arrived whilst I was at work. I was stuck imagining using it for the rest of the day. Undeterred, however, I tore off the clear bag that it came in and was lovingly holding it throughout the day. It was squishy. I loved the feeling that it held between my hands, and with each gentle squeeze, I’d stare longingly at it. Absolutely intrigued, I’ve got to say. I’ve held a lot of dicks and dildos in my lifetime, but I hadn’t felt anything like this.

Being told it was a body safe silicone blew me away. I’d felt silicone toys and whilst they were exceptional, they were often firm and squishy. My Bad Dragon was a squishy silicone. Initially, I’d been a bit deterred by the size, but given how much flex and squishiness was in this sex toy, I felt pretty confident that I’d be able to fit it.

Bad Dragon Fantasy Sex Toys

Bad Dragon is known for their fantasy sex toys, but they are also known for hole stretching. They also offer three different levels of firmness, from soft, medium, to firm. The soft, from the three density testers that they gave me – felt absolutely amazing. The firm disc was a little hard, but it was still softer than what I was accustomed to when it came to other silicone toys. And like goldilocks in the bear’s house, the medium density was just the perfect amount of squish with a shape holding ability.

It was cute. I’ll admit it.

The detail was simply amazing, and it didn’t seem like a run-of-the-mill kind of dildo that you’d get at your local dick store. There was something different about it. Unique. I know that the sex toy is handmade – but this whole unique idea made it that much more intimate.

It’s kind of like how every guy has a dick, but each dick (might be very very similar) but, they each have their own look and personality. Maybe I liked it because it reminded me of this analogy.

Right. Down to business. The Bad Dragon Review!

I stripped off. Lubed up and spread. One issue that I have with silicone sex toys is that when you go to lube them up, some of them can be quite grabby and have resistance. I’m not sure why – but I didn’t experience this issue with the Bad Dragon. Maybe it’s the type of silicone that they use, maybe my other ‘silicone’ toys just aren’t proper silicone – I’m not sure. What I am sure is that there was very little drag for this toy.

I was right to be worried about the size, as it did take some working to get in. Once it was in, though, the silicone did a wonderful job of remaining comfortable. There was enough firmness to keep it in, but not overly so that it was tearing me to pieces. This eggplant is quite filling – even though I received mine in one of the smaller sizes . Getting over that hump in the middle was a challenge, and I’m certainly grateful for the give in the silicone that the Vergil has.

The Bad Dragon Stimulates The P-Spot or G-Spot

There’s a delightful little pointed tip on the end of this one, which I learned was to stimulate the prostate (or G-spot). Whilst it wasn’t angled perfectly for me, I did notice it clawing its way across the walls. This added a little extra to this dildo than something that was purely straight. Sure, it might not have been just right for my body, but it’ll be sure to hit some people’s spots just right.

When I’m doing anal play – I always make sure that I’m clean and body ready. The small hole in the tip (reminiscent of the urethra of a dick) looks great, it adds that sensual touch that you might need. I can see that you will need to pay special attention here when cleaning. You can definitely tell that Bad Dragon go that touch extra to ensure that their dildos are absolutely perfect.

Whilst I might not be completely converted to the idea of eggplants, I do like my eggplant dildo. Having used and enjoyed it several times whilst writing this review. I love the fact that I don’t necessarily need to ensure that he’s hidden every time someone comes into my room. It now sits proudly on my shelf as one of my first reach to toys when I need some filling.

Thanks Bad Dragon!

Author: Stephen Smith – BA Of Social Sciences, M.Ed