We have physiotherapists to help us get our body back into shape after an injury. We have psychologists and counsellors to talk about any worries and concerns in our lives. We go to the doctor if something in our bodies is troubling us, with a great deal of attention placed on our physical health, mental health and well being. Our sexual health can be an area that is too often neglected, with sexual healing being a recently more open field focusing on the sexual health and well being of all individuals.
Why would someone see a sex therapist/sexual healer?
Our sexuality can be an area of our lives where much of our trauma, wounding and unhealthy patterns lurk in the shadows. These can come up in destructive ways that can but do not necessarily have to do with sex itself. We could be feeling stagnant in our creativity or suffering with body shame or we just keep on attracting “damaged” people to be in a relationship with. A sexual healer is someone who can facilitate and support us through a process of healing our negative conditioning, sexual wounds and traumas so that we can live a more fulfilling life.
Who needs to see a sexual healer?
Just to be clear, no one NEEDS to see any kind of healer, however, if you feel like some of the worries or issues in your life relate to sex, relationships or love, you can greatly benefit from this kind of therapeutic work. People who have a history of sexual abuse or trauma commonly seek out this kind of support due to the nature of their trauma, people who are having unfulfilling, abusive or unhealthy relationships may be drawn to work through their issues with a sex therapist and people who are desiring more pleasure and satisfaction in their sex lives can also benefit greatly from this work. Those suffering from any kind of sexual dysfunction such as low libido, premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, vaginismus, and dyspareunia as well as low body confidence or self-esteem can gain a great deal of assistance from a sexual healer or therapist.
What can happen in a session?
No two people are the same so no two sessions will be. Sexual healing sessions are tailor made to each individuals unique needs. They can involve counselling & therapy, working on establishing healthy boundaries & communication skills and bodywork (i.e. massage and touch). With a professional sexual healer or therapist, nothing will ever happen in a session that is not within your boundaries. I stress the importance of professional as it is vital to find someone who is competent and renowned for having integrity. This brings me to the next question…
How do I know who to go to?
Sexuality is such an intimate area of our lives, with care and attention necessary in order to find the person right for you. There are male and female therapists out there who offer some incredible services in Sydney and across Australia. Women who have sexual trauma involving men are sometimes reluctant to, yet can benefit greatly from working with a male practitioner. To have a safe representation of a man as you heal can be profoundly healing. The same applies for men who may have a traumatic history with women working with female practitioners. It may be a challenge to go into such intimate work with someone of the opposite gender yet it can be very powerful. What is important is you find someone who is trustworthy, respectful and competent. Read testimonials, do your research and ask around. This can be work that is extremely intimidating to start so be kind to yourself and understand it can take some time before you feel ready to dive in. The Sydney Tantric Massage website for those in the area is a great resource for professional practitioners, as well as the Association of Certified Sexological Bodyworkers Website (For Australia and worldwide practitioners). A good practitioner will answer any queries you may have prior to organizing a session – ask as many questions as you feel so that it is clear what it is that will be happening in the session.
The right to healthy expression of our sexuality is our birthright as human beings, with many in the world subjected to sexual abuse, discrimination, and suppression. From my experience, diving into healing my sexual traumas and reshifting my conditioning in regards to sex has changed every area of my life. My relationships have become deeper and more fulfilling, my body confidence has skyrocketed and in general, I feel more joy & pleasure throughout my days. I wholeheartedly believe that our sexual health deserves our care and attention just like any part of ourselves. Once we bring our sexual shadows into the light, we can show up in the world as a freer and more authentic version of ourselves.
Author: Stephanie Curtis – BA. Nursing., Grad. Dip. Sexology
Explore Stephanie Curtis’s profound insights! A caring sexologist, she delves into spirituality, tantra with professional, articulate, interesting articles.