A sex slave is just one particular role in the kink scene. Every person identifies to a one. Some people in the BDSM community identify with more roles than one. Not everyone who is a sub behaves in the same way. In fact, every sub is different, every masochist is different, and every slave is different, and so on.
What Exactly Is A Submissive?
A Submissive is a person, male or female, who enjoys submitting to a dominant partner. Submissives have personal rights and limits that the dominant partner must follow. They can voice their opinions respectfully and they have safe words. This limits what they will and will not do. Submissive people can be owned or free, according to what they want.
If they are owned they still have choices.
A Masochist is a person, male or female, who enjoys receiving pain. A little more like a free player, but can also be Submissive. They can also voice opinions, hard limits and rules. Safe words are also used and they can be with a permanent play partner or play with different partners whenever they like. If they wish to, they can be owned too.
Again, they also have choices.
What is a Sex Slave?
A Slave is a person, male or female, who once commits to their Master or Mistress. They give up all rights to that person. They have no say in anything, no safe words,unless their owner allows them to use one. Depending on what they have previously discussed, every move requires permission.
A slave has no rights and must obey his/her Master/Mistress.
When I started in the kink scene, I identified as a Submissive. I found being a submissive very challenging. When I first started exploring my submissive side, it definitely made me feel – empowered and excited, but also a little restless. I knew something was missing, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it.
As I pushed my boundaries and try new things, I wanted even more. That’s when I stumbled upon masochism and let me tell you, it was a wild ride. The rush of danger, the fear, the enjoyment of pain – it was a completely unique experience that helped me grow in ways I never thought possible.
I had a good time on my trip, but I felt like something was lacking. I had this idea in my head that scared me a bit, but I couldn’t shake it off. I wanted to be fully submissive, like a slave. When you’re playing this game, anything can happen, and you can’t really back out once you’re in it.
It Takes Courage To Relinquish Control To Your Master
I mulled over the thought for some time. It takes a lot of courage to put your entire body and life in the hands of My Master, but for me, it was all or nothing.
After investing a lot of time in searching for the right Master, I found one! This took lots of back and forth conversations between myself and other people. Lots of extensive trials and a lot of devotion. I decided I was ready to do this and was going to become a Slave.
It was a mutual decision between the master and the Slave. One that was not rushed and one that was discussed in great detail beforehand. Everything had to be very clear for both our sakes and for the sakes of our families.
I was very fortunate in finding an amazing Master.
Having a Master who genuinely cares and takes the time to evaluate every situation is a game-changer. It’s amazing how my Master spends hours brainstorming on what I need and how to deliver it in a respectful and nurturing way.
When I’m with my Master, I feel complete and fulfilled in a way that being a Submissive or a Masochist never did for me. It’s like being in a whole new state of mind that’s difficult to put into words. It’s all about discipline – following what the Master says without questioning it. With the right guidance, you can improve yourself and become a better version of yourself.
Your Master should always be there to offer support and advice.
Being a Slave is about pleasing him and making him proud. This is what makes me happy. In the Master/Slave lifestyle, the experience has been one of the strongest I have experienced so far. Probably because of the level of intensity and trust required. The levels seem to be much deeper and gratifying.
I think that I have finally found my peace at last.
Control Your Sex Slave With A Leash
XR Brands brings us this chain leash from their Tom of Finland series. XR Brands are the people who bring us some amazing lines that you may have heard of including; Master Series, CleanStream, STRICT, Strict Leather, Prostatic Play and of course Tom of Finland.
All six of these lines being available here at Adult Lifestyle Centres or on Adultsmart our online store.
About Tom Of Finland
Touko Valio Laaksonen, a Finnish artist known for his stylized highly masculinized homoerotic fetish art, and better known by his pseudonym Tom of Finland. He produced over 3500 illustrations in his 71 years of life. Most all of them featuring men wearing tight clothing, fetish gear or little to no clothing at all with exaggerated sexual features.
He has been called the “most influential creator of gay pornographic images” by cultural historian Joseph W. Slade. Having a huge impact on gay culture throughout the 20th century and continues to, to this day. The Tom of Finland Foundation and his artwork still inspiring, turning on, reassuring and unifying its viewers.
“Tom of Finland is one of the five most influential artists of the twentieth century. As an artist he was superb, as an influence he was transcendent.”- Harvey S. Shipley Mille
The Tom of Finland series has a lot to live up to. Luckily XR brands have created some wonderful and quality items in their Tom of Finland range. They include collars, leads, restraints, clamps, insertables and more.
Tom Of Finland Leash Packaging
The Tom of Finland Leash comes in wonderful packaging featuring Touko Valio Laaksonen’s artwork on the box that is metallic and reflective in places. It is so nice you may have the urge to preserve the packing itself. I considered doing this. But to my delight I discovered that inside as a bonus each product.
The Tom of Finland range includes a collectable, exclusive art print. A portion of proceeds going to the Tom of Finland Foundation, dedicated to protecting, preserving, and promoting erotic art.
Tom Of Finland Leash Design
Now for what’s inside the box!
The leash is a lovely gun metal grey colour of the chain is beautiful. Different to other leashes I’ve seen out there that tend to just come in either black or silver metal. I adore this colour and it really set this leash apart looking incredibly stylish with the black neoprene hand strap that is soft yet sturdily made.
There is a silver metal look plastic plate on the handle embossed with the Tom of Finland logo.
Inside Each Leash Is A Bonus Tom Of Finland Print
Neoprene is a synthetic rubber that resists degradation. More than natural or other synthetic rubbers. It is easy to clean if the need arises. Just use a warm wet cloth to wipe down the surface of the leash and its handle. With water only as neoprene is sensitive to household chemicals and urine.
So if golden showers are your thing, be careful to not be wearing any of the neoprene range. Neoprene is also vegan-friendly making the entire Tom of Finland matching collar, leash, ankle and wrist cuff set the perfect choice for those who wish to avoid purchasing or using animal products. Or if you simply don’t lioke leather or silicone. It is a excellent alternative.
The Tom of Finland gun metal chain leash is 42 inches (106.68cm) in total length, the chain without handle being 30 inches (76.2cm). This is a good length, in my opinion, for a leash intended for human use. When using my leash I never thought it was too long, which can be a pain. Having excess chain in the way. Or too short, which can cause unwanted tugging on the person who has it attached to their collar.
My Final Thoughts
This leash is an excellent addition to anyone into or considering collar and leash play, stylish. It is of high quality and with a rich history behind it. You will feel confident and in charge with its bold dark metallic grey glinting. You can you show off your submissive or as you’re being shown off.
Using the Tom Of Finland Leash is an incredible way to introduce dominance and submission into your sexual lifestyle.
Author: Erin is a consultant from Oh Zone Adult Lifestyle Centres
Enter Andrew Pullen BDSM world of Fet Lifestyle, BDSM, and expert Shibari insights. Explore his descriptive and educational articles at Adultsmart.